Tragic Beauty (Beauty & The Darkness #1)(59)

I get two rocks glasses from the cupboard and slip the rims between my fingers and carry them back, keeping my other arm tight against my body. My hand throbs, but like Shayne said, I have quite the pain threshold now.

He takes the bottle and fills both glasses, takes one to Red, and sits down.

I’m not sure what to do, since the other setting is gone now, and am about to walk back to the kitchen, when Shayne snaps his fingers while he takes a drink and points to the floor by the side of his chair.

I stare at the spot on the Navajo rug, feeling the heat sear my cheeks. If it was just Shayne…just the beast…

Slowly, I walk to his chair and sink to my knees, knowing Red’s watching.

The sadist has found another way to hurt.

It’s quiet now, except for the awkward clang of silverware as they both start eating. I’m holding my hand, looking down through the darkness in a blur, ignoring the pain in my knees, when a piece of chicken appears, hanging from Shayne’s fingers.

It dangles there, dripping with a bit of fat.

I stare at it, and keep staring, and staring, that lump in my throat growing, then I open my mouth and take the chicken.

When I swallow it down, it wants to come back up, but I won’t let it.

Shayne jerks his chair back, causing me to jump. “Almost forgot! We need some music.”

He walks out of the room and I know Red’s watching me now. I can feel it by the way he sits quietly, not even eating. Music breaks the silence, drifting from all around.

Shayne enters the room again. “The man in black!” he says. “Just like me.” He sits back down and they both start eating again. “You know who this is, right Red? Johnny Cash! Figured it’s appropriate, you know? He lost a brother, just like me. And boy, he had it bad for that June, didn’t he? His whole life, it was June, June, June. Just like me with my Ava.” He feeds me another piece of chicken. “Isn’t that right, baby?”

I nod, chewing slowly.

“Did you ever see that movie, Red? Walk the Line I think it was.”

“No.”

“Awww, you got to see it. Always been a Cash fan so I made sure I saw it. And it was a damn good movie. Damn good. June doesn’t make it easy for him, but he marries her in the end, and they live happily ever after. Just like me and my Ava are going to.”

Shayne leans over and puts his glass of bourbon to my lips and whispers, “Isn’t that right, baby?”

I want to seal my mouth shut, but instead, nod and take a sip.

And how it burns.

Shayne sets his glass down and pets my hair, then picks up his fork again. “So how’s the east pasture looking, Red? It’s been forever since I been out there. Think we should move the steers over yet?”

I tune out when they set in on ranch talk, just kneeling there, holding my hand, and taking whatever scraps Shayne feeds me, and sipping the bourbon when he sets the glass to my lips. I’ve never had alcohol before. Never wanted to touch it after I saw what it did to my father. I never want to touch it again. I can feel it working though. I can feel that fire burning inside me.

Shayne leans back in his chair and sighs. “That was so good, Ava. So fucking good. We haven’t had a meal like that in ages, have we, baby?”

I shake my head.

“What do you think, Red? Did you like it?”

He must’ve nodded, because Shayne adds, “You got to speak up, so she can hear. She can’t see you from where she’s at.”

“Was real good, Ava,” Red says, speaking up over the music. He sounds sincere again, but I don’t pay attention. I’m just waiting for this to be over so I can curl up in my corner again.

“Alright! Time for dessert,” Shayne says, slapping his stomach. “Apple pie, isn’t it? Is that what I smelled earlier?”

I nod and start to get up, clutching my arm to my side, when he yanks me by the ponytail and jerks me back down. “Did I say to get up? No, don’t think I did. We’ll take care of this, won’t we Red? Poor Ava’s hand’s all messed up. Guess I don’t know my own strength sometimes.” The chair jerks back and he stands. “Stay,” he says, then takes his plate away.

I sit there, staring at the rug, hearing the music above me, feeling the beast around me. He says something to Red about grabbing plates and forks, then he’s back, placing the pie on the table.

“Did you make this from scratch?” he asks. “Just for me?”

I nod.

“Damn, that was sweet of you. Hey, Red, why don’t you do the honors?”

A moment later, they’re eating again.

“Sorry, honey,” Shayne says to me. “Bit messy to feed you this. But don’t worry, you got dessert coming.”

Those words hang in the air, floating around like darts inside my mind, while they both keep eating.

A little bit later, Shayne leans back in his chair. “Don’t know about you, Red, but I’m stuffed.” He reaches out and pets my hair. “That was one good meal, Ava. Figured you knew how to cook, but you blew me away tonight. Guess it’s my turn to fix up something special for you now.”

The beast moves his chair back and I flinch, then he starts undoing his pants.

No. Please no.

Not here.

Not with…

“Hey, Shayne,” Red says. “Maybe I should be going.”