Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything(89)
It caused me pain when people would e-mail me or call me for help. They would have worthy projects, and they’d ask: “How can I learn more about your work?” I’d lamely reply: “Read my Twitter posts carefully and search for some of my videos online.” Ultimately, I didn’t have an answer. And I felt pretty bad about that. At the time, there wasn’t anything I could offer that brought together the models and methods of Behavior Design. Something that the student in Peru could use to design a better recycling service. Something that would help the county health worker design an effective immunization program. Something families could use to make their lives better. Something like a book.
My airplane dream helped me realize that in the same way Tiny Habits had helped my sister it could help everyone’s sister, brother, mother, father, son, and daughter. I knew these insights could help anyone feeling defeated by what life throws at them. Anyone mired in shame and self-criticism. Anyone who sees the person they want to be and the life they want to live but doesn’t know how to get there. Anyone who doubts that meaningful change is possible in the first place.
If I had given up Tiny Habits all those years ago, and if I hadn’t been resolved to help my sister, I might have missed out on a huge realization: My work at Stanford and with industry leaders is important, but that’s not what’s going to change the world.
You are.
I don’t mean that in a kumbaya, hand-holding kind of way. I mean that in a straight-up, these-are-the-facts-Jack kind of way.
By now you know the habits you create using the Tiny Habits method are far from tiny—they are mighty.
Habits may be the smallest units of transformation, but they’re also the most fundamental. They are the first concentric circles of change that will spiral out. Think about it. One person starts one habit that builds to two habits that builds to three habits that changes an identity that inspires a loved one who influences their peer group and changes their mindset, which spreads like wildfire and disrupts a culture of helplessness, empowering everyone and slowly changing the world. By starting small with yourself and your family, you initiate a natural proc--ess that can create a tidal wave of change.
When I’m really dreaming big (and that’s quite often), I think about how Behavior Design can play a role in creating the large-scale changes the world needs by reversing the spiral of failure that is so pervasive today. What if accurate models of behavior and effective methods for change were common knowledge and common practice? The potential for change would be enormous. Young kids could learn about Shine and apply it throughout their lives. Healthcare workers all over the world could learn to help patients succeed with healthy habits and use those same concepts to help themselves manage stress more effectively. Monday-morning meetings at companies could be more productive by framing each business challenge in terms of behavior change. Innovators could use Behavior Design to create products that help people transform into their best selves. Policy makers and civil servants could more easily translate abstract problems into specific behaviors—then empower their communities to create and implement the solutions.
This vision of the future may be a few years away, but the good news is that we can start cultivating a culture of change right now. One of the fastest ways to set off this chain reaction is for you to introduce people to the Behavior Design ways of thinking and doing. This is something you can do tonight at dinner—talk to your friends and family about what you’ve learned in this book. A shared understanding of change is the foundation for collective transformation. When you frame a problem from an accurate common perspective, you can more quickly and successfully solve it. And Behavior Design excels here. When a work team learns my models, they gain a shared way of thinking about behavior and talking about change. When they learn these methods, they learn a shared way of designing for change on a concrete, practical level. Just as important, it makes them more efficient, more impactful, and it reduces conflict, which keeps them from wasting valuable time. With your help, everyone in your circle can reap the benefits of a shared perspective on how human behavior works and the ways you can design for change.
Here’s how you can help create a culture of change right now.
BY SHARING
Engage in conversations about change with the people around you. Share the most salient insights of the book—my maxims, for instance.
Help people do what they already want to do.
Help people feel successful.
To make it more personal, you can adapt the two maxims this way.
Help yourself do what you already want to do.
Help yourself feel successful.
Share what you’ve found most helpful about this book. Maybe you use the garden analogy about how habits work: that our collection of habits is an ever-shifting landscape we can nurture by design or ignore at our peril. And that we start a habit by planting a tiny seed in a good spot, then keep nurturing it. As the gardeners of our habits, we won’t be perfect. There will be trial and error—and that’s okay. Or perhaps you share the analogy of untangling bad habits like a big knot. This simple image sets the right expectations of how to get rid of a habit, and it also is powerful for helping people let go of shame and self-criticism. These ideas are easy to share, and they open people up to thinking about change and habits in a new, accurate, and helpful way.