The Wild Heir(98)

“It’s you. I have money.”

“Listen, Heidi. I’m sorry…”

“Are you telling me that the Crown Prince won’t support his child? Is that the kind of father you want to be? The world is going to judge you on this, but you should be judging yourself. This child is going to grow up without a father’s love.”

Oh my god. I’m going to be sick.

This is actually happening.

He’s going to be a father, a father of someone else’s baby.

I can’t handle this.

“Heidi, have some compassion,” Magnus says, his voice barely a whisper. He’s losing the fight and he knows it.

I know it.

Oh god.

“You have some compassion for me,” Heidi says. “I’ll let you keep these files just in case you don’t believe me. Trust me, I have more than enough copies at home, you know, in case my father or the press wants to see. Perhaps your father, hmmm?”

“Look,” Magnus says, gasping for air as he runs his hand through his hair, tugging on the ends in frustration. “Let’s just…I need to process all of this. So does Ella. Give us a few days and then we can figure something out.”

Heidi crosses her arms and looks between the two of us, smiling at our stunned and staggered expressions. Smiling because she’s winning.

“Okay. I’ll be back. But just so you know, there isn’t much to figure out, Magnus. Everything going forward is all about you and me. It’s that simple.”

Then she turns around and flounces out of the door and down the stairs.

Magnus barely has enough strength to close the door behind her and collapses against it, staring at the tiled floor in a daze. “This isn’t happening,” he says. “This can’t be happening to us. Not now. Fuck, not now!” He yells and pounds his fist against the door.

I should calm him down but I’m equally as mad, and as the seconds go by I find myself growing more mad at him.

“Say something,” Magnus says, glancing at me through his hair in his eyes. “Please. Ella. Say something.”

My mouth opens, trying to find words. Heat builds behind my eyes. “I can’t believe this.”

“I know…”

“I can’t believe you.”

He glances at me sharply. “What? Me?”

“Why did you have to sleep with her of all people? Aren’t you picky at all? Don’t you have standards?”

He frowns, incredulous. “What does that have to do with it?”

“Because you slept with her and you probably knew she was bad news. Now she’s here, trying to ruin our lives. Oh my god, Magnus. We’re newlyweds. We just…this isn’t fair. I didn’t…I can’t do this,” I tell him, doing everything I can to hold back the tears. “No, I can’t handle this, not right now.”

“Ella, please. Don’t do anything.”

“I need to think. I need to…Magnus. Don’t you know what position this puts me in?”

“Don’t you know what position it puts me in?”

“Yes. As a father. Because you reap what you sow,” I say bitterly, practically spitting out the words.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. You fucked her, over and over again, not caring that she was nuts. You make this god damn sex tape. You do all these things because you don’t have a fucking brain, because you’re reckless, you’re irresponsible, you’re selfish.” I know what I’m saying hurts him, but I can’t stop, the frustration and fear is too strong. “It’s your inability to think about any consequences that got us into this mess!”

He stares at me like I just slapped him in the face. His nostrils flare as he inhales. “Fuck. You.”

“It’s the truth, Magnus. If you had just given it a moment’s thought, this never would have happened.”

“If I hadn’t fucked up and gotten myself in this mess, you wouldn’t be here!”

“Yeah, well maybe that would have been for the best.”

He blinks at me in awe. “What are you saying?”

I need to stop talking. I need to get a hold of myself. I’m hurt, and confused, and I’m scared. So scared of where this is going, so scared that in the end I’ll be tossed aside. It doesn’t matter that we’re married, he could still discard me, he could still end up with her.

I press my lips together, afraid to say something I’ll regret, but instead I start shaking and quivering inside like a volcano ready to blow.

“What are you saying?” he asks again. “Don’t tell me you’re considering those clauses. Don’t tell me that’s how you’re going to handle it. Turn into a little girl and run away.”

“I am not a little girl! I’m your wife and you’re having a baby with another woman. How the fuck do you think I feel? How do you think I’m supposed to act?”

“It’s not a choice, Ella! I’m stuck with this fucking problem too. What do you want me to do? Turn my back on a child that’s mine? Cast her out when I’m also responsible for what happened?”

Yes. That’s exactly what I want to happen.

And I hate to say it, I hate to be that person.

It would be better if we could pretend that Heidi didn’t exist, that there was no child on the way.