The Therapist(54)



‘That’s great,’ I say casually. But I’m on high alert after what I overheard yesterday. ‘It’s always good to get things out in the open, otherwise misunderstandings can build up.’

She nods slowly. ‘I’m glad I’ve seen you because I feel guilty about bad-mouthing him yesterday, when you came over for coffee, especially as you’ll be seeing him tonight. He’s not all bad – he’s a brilliant father – but we’re very different people, something I didn’t realise at first.’

‘I guess we all try to fit the ideal of the person we want to impress,’ I say, thinking back to what she said about Connor pretending, when they first met, to enjoy the same things as her.

‘That’s exactly what he said. He said he fell madly in love with me and tried to be the perfect man for me. He couldn’t keep it up, that’s all.’ She picks up her fork and breaks off a piece of the chocolate cake. ‘It’s not just that, though,’ she says, pausing with her fork halfway to her mouth. ‘I’ve always suspected that he had an affair with Nina but I never dared ask him because I was afraid of what he would say, of what I might find out. Now, I wish I’d asked him ages ago and saved myself a lot of anguish.’ She lifts her fork the rest of the way. ‘This is delicious. Try it.’

‘So he didn’t have an affair with Nina?’ I ask, attacking my cake.

‘No. But he wanted to.’

‘Oh.’ I put my fork down. ‘How do you feel about that?’

‘Surprisingly fine, because it’s cleared up something that’s been eating away at me for a long time.’ She turns her plate and makes a start on the coffee cake. ‘A few months before she died, Nina began distancing herself from me,’ she says, telling me what I already know from Eve. ‘I thought I’d annoyed her by asking her to refer me to her therapist. She had been helping me sift through my emotions – as a friend, not a therapist – and I felt that I needed the professional help she couldn’t give me. I was worried she’d taken offence, especially when she never came back with a name.’

‘I had therapy after my sister and parents died and I don’t know if I’d have made it through without it. But – Nina saw a therapist?’

‘Yes, a lot of therapists do. Some because they feel they need it, some because they believe the experience of being in therapy makes them a better therapist. I think for Nina it was a mixture of both.’ She stabs at her cake. ‘Anyway, the reason she no longer wanted to see me was nothing to do with her being annoyed with me, but because of Connor. He used to take his whiskies over for her to taste and I was fine about it, I hate whisky so I was glad he had someone who shared his passion. But one night, he tried to kiss her. She pushed him away but the trouble with Connor is that he can’t take no for an answer. When he insisted, she threatened to tell me. He begged her not to and, in the end, she agreed not to say anything. But she did a complete character assassination on him, said she despised him for even thinking he could cheat on me.’

‘And he took it? The character assassination?’

She looks at me appraisingly. ‘I know what you’re thinking. You’re wondering if maybe he was angry with her for what she said, and killed her.’

‘No, I wasn’t thinking that at all,’ I say, my cheeks hot, and not just because I’m worried about someone overhearing our conversation, despite the distance between the tables. It’s the way she said it so matter-of-factly that shocked me. Also, I can’t ignore the possibility – because Lorna’s words are never far from my mind – that this is another conversation that has been staged. ‘I was thinking that you’re amazing for not minding that he kissed Nina.’

She pushes her empty plate to one side and sits back in her chair. ‘I do mind, of course I do. But the relief of knowing that Nina only dropped me because she felt awkward around me somehow means more than knowing that Connor kissed her.’ She fixes me with her green eyes. ‘Can you understand that, Alice?’

I nod slowly. I can, because Leo lying to me, and about me, has affected me just as much, if not more, than the thought of Nina being murdered in our bedroom.

‘And Connor told you all this?’ I try not to sound sceptical.

‘Yes.’

‘Well, it’s great that you’ve worked it out between you,’ I say.

She nods happily. ‘We’ve agreed to start over, put it all behind us.’ She looks at my slice of coffee cake. ‘Aren’t you going to eat that?’

I laugh and push my plate towards her. ‘Go ahead,’ I tell her. ‘I need to get going, anyway.’





Twenty-Seven


Leo phones me when I’m on my way home but by the time I’ve shifted my bags into one hand, tucked the flowers under my arm, and taken my mobile from my pocket, his call has gone through to voicemail. I listen to his message and feel relieved when he says that Ginny and Mark have invited him for the weekend, because I’ve been feeling guilty about him being alone. My phone rings again and I smile when I see that it’s Ginny.

I put my bags between my feet while I talk to her. ‘Yes, I know, Leo is spending the weekend with you,’ I say, because I know she’ll feel that she has to tell me.

‘That is alright, isn’t it?’ she asks anxiously. ‘Mark said we should invite him.’

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