The Ruthless Gentleman(37)

He let out a breath and I released his arm. “I’d never thought of it like that, but you might be right. He came back different. Which of course he was bound to because war changes you but also he just didn’t need me as much. Maybe that was his plan.”

Hayden sounded like he wanted to be needed by his brother. Would I miss it if I didn’t have Michael relying on me?

The fireworks continued and we watched, commenting every now and then on how beautiful they were, our confessions to each other settling like foundations of a building.

“I was angry with you for not leaving the boat this evening,” Hayden said out of nowhere. “You deserved a break. When I gave the crew the night off—I meant for you to go with them.”

“It’s my job to be here. You’re meant to be on vacation. If anyone deserves a break, it’s you. You’ve not stopped since you came aboard.” I wasn’t sure he was going to make it a full eight weeks. He was barely sleeping and working through the night every night.

“But that’s my choice. I’m trying to save my business.”

“And yachting is my business. You take your career seriously and so do I. I’m not leaving my guest without a stewardess on board. What if you needed something?”

“Is that the only reason you stayed?” he asked.

I’d never been a good liar, but with Hayden I found myself revealing parts of me I’d kept completely secret. “I don’t know,” I replied. It was only half the reason. I could hardly confess the rest.

He paused. “You’re beautiful,” he said, and my heart thundered in my chest.

“Because I care about my job?” I teased, trying to lighten the moment.

“Exactly.” He narrowed his eyes and the air all around me pressed against my skin, making me aware of every part exposed to the warm breeze.

He turned his entire body toward me. “I want to kiss you.” My heartbeat got louder, mixing with the booms of the fireworks. I could make a joke and move away; it was what I would do if any other guest made a pass at me. I could excuse myself. I could run.

But I didn’t. I didn’t want to avoid anything. So I stayed, looking at him, my gaze flickering to the faded sky. “I can’t kiss a guest,” I whispered. I’d never wanted to before. Never even been tempted. I’d assumed that would always be the case, that I’d always care about my job above any fleeting moment of . . . whatever this was. But right then, it felt like a choice between my job and my soul. Like I fundamentally needed this deep down inside. Needed him. Maybe it was what my dad had said about having something for myself. Maybe it was just that I’d gone so long without a man touching me, but I didn’t think so. It was Hayden Wolf and the way he kept constantly blowing my expectations of him out of the water, his lack of entourage, his moments of humor and his dedication to his business despite the fact that he probably didn’t have to work again given his obvious wealth. It was the way he’d given the crew the night off when there was no reason to. He was a good man. A man so beautiful I caught my breath every time I saw him, and a man I wanted to kiss.

“But you want me to kiss you,” he said, plucking my glass from my tightened fingers and placing it on the table behind him alongside his.

I couldn’t argue—I wasn’t a liar.

“The blush across your cheek . . .”

He stood right in front of me, so close I could feel the heat rolling off his body. He reached behind me and pulled my hair free from the tie, slowly, deliberately as if he was savoring some kind of transformation. “The way your nipples tighten when I’m close. The way your pussy is aching right now . . . it all tells me how much you want me to kiss you.”

I pulled my bottom lip into my mouth and glanced at my feet. I couldn’t move, couldn’t contradict the dirty things he was saying. I wasn’t sure if it was because he was right, or because his words were just so damn filthy, but I couldn’t remember ever being so turned on by a man who’d barely touched me.

His thumb swept across my bottom lip, coaxing it free of my teeth, then

he tilted my head up to face him. He stared into my eyes intently as if he were communicating, telling me he’d stop if that was what I wanted.

But I didn’t.

I wanted to forget he was a guest and I was a stewardess.

I wanted to forget I was putting my job on the line at that precise moment.

I wanted him to kiss me.

He stepped forward, his thighs scraping against my hips as he cupped my face in his hands, sweeping his thumbs across my cheekbones.

I sank against his body, needing more of him, desperate for his lips on mine. He sighed and closed his eyelids lazily before pressing his lips to mine. My skin began to buzz. I wasn’t sure if it were in warning or pleasure, but either way, I didn’t care. I was right where I wanted to be, selfishly enjoying the man in front of me. He snaked his arm around me, pressing his huge palm into the small of my back, pulling me against him.

I opened my mouth with a groan and he slipped his tongue into my mouth. He tasted masculine, like heat and earth, as if he was the center of everything, and at that moment he was. He was solid. I could trust him. He’d look after me and protect me and a long-buried part of myself burst into relief. My knees buckled, but he kept me upright. His arms felt as if they were exactly where they were meant to be—around me.