The Night Tiger(125)

* * *



The next few days were quiet. My mother and stepfather were surprisingly subdued about the whole affair. The hospital had already notified them in the blandest of terms: an unfortunate accident with a mentally disturbed individual. And of course, they would cover all medical fees and pay Shin’s salary for the rest of the summer, though he was excused from duties. Although my mother exclaimed over my cuts, she was relieved that my face wasn’t marked.

“A girl’s face is so important,” she said as she helped change the dressing on my side. “Imagine how upset Robert would be!”

“What does Robert have to do with this?”

I shouldn’t have said that. Her face fell and that timid look appeared. “You’re still friends, aren’t you?”

“As much as we ever were.” Which wasn’t much, but I didn’t have the heart to say so. I looked down, suddenly anxious. “Did you manage to make this month’s payment?”

I hadn’t given her quite enough money to cover the loan, but to my surprise, she said, “You mustn’t worry about that anymore. Your stepfather paid it.”

“All of it?”

She hesitated. “No. Shin gave me some money to help pay it down.” I understood, without her saying a word, that it must have been terrifying to confess even that reduced amount to my stepfather.

“Was he furious?” I stared at her arms, her narrow wrists. She was wearing loose sleeves; I couldn’t tell if there was anything amiss.

“He had a right to be.”

“And? Did he do anything else?” Fury and despair were rising in me, choking my throat.

My mother looked down at the floor. I realized this was deeply humiliating for her. “I begged him. I cried so hard that I fainted.” At my look of horror, she said quickly, “It was actually a good thing. It worried him, coming after the miscarriage. I suppose he realized it wasn’t worth it. And I’m fine.” A grimace. “He made me swear not to touch a mahjong tile again.”

Catching my anxious eye, my mother gave me a warning look. This time, it was none of my business. I supposed that the scare over my mother’s miscarriage might have softened my stepfather up. Made him realize that he might be widowed again. Still, it was a tremendous relief. That debt had been hanging like an anvil over our heads. My mother smiled weakly. “Perhaps I should have told him from the start. I’m sure Robert would be milder about things like that.”

“Mother, does it have to be Robert?”

She must have heard the sadness in my voice, because she stopped fiddling with my bandages and hugged me. “No, it doesn’t. As long as he makes you happy.”

“Really?” My spirits rose. Why had I ever doubted her?

“Does Shin approve?”

“Of who?”

“Of whomever it is you like.”

I couldn’t stop smiling. “Yes, he does.”





51

Batu Gajah

Thursday, July 2nd




Ren watches his master closely after Lydia’s departure. Does his stomach feel better after drinking the medicine? But William goes out to the veranda, tearing at his stiff collar as though he can’t breathe. He sits there, motionless, head in his hands as somewhere out in the dense jungle canopy, a bird sings. It’s a merbuk, a zebra dove whose soft haunting call echoes through the vast green space.

“Tuan, are you sick?”

William turns, face pale and beaded with sweat. He doesn’t look well, but he smiles briefly. “You’re a good boy, Ren. I’ve been thinking: would you like to go to school?”

Surprised by this good fortune, Ren can only blink and stammer. “Yes. But the housework—”

“You needn’t worry about that. We’ll be getting new servants anyway.”

Does this mean that Ren has lost his job? “Of course not,” says William, reading his worried look. “There’ll be some changes; it can’t be helped. But I’ll make sure you go to school. It’s the least I can do.” He makes a wry face.

Ren understands about guilt and bewilderment. Yi hasn’t come to his dreams anymore, not since the last time by the river. In fact, he can find no trace of his twin at all. That faint radio signal has ceased transmitting, or is it tuned to another station now, one that he can’t hear? Whatever it is, he thinks of Yi with love and sadness. One day, they will be together again.



* * *



Dismissed, Ren starts back to the kitchen. Then he turns. It’s not his place to ask, but he gathers up all his courage. “Tuan, are you marrying Miss Lydia?”

A tilt of the head. It’s hard to read his master’s expression. “You don’t like that idea?”

“She said her Chinese name was Li. Like yours.”

“Does it make us a good match, then?” There’s bitterness in William’s voice. Ren wonders what the rest of that long conversation was about, the one that ended with Lydia looking so pleased and his master so ashen.

“I don’t know,” says Ren honestly. He’s confused. Which one of them is the mysterious Li then? Or perhaps he’s been mistaken and neither of them is. Pressing his fingers into the numb white mark on his elbow only makes him dizzy, the air grows heavy and dark. He remembers the filmy cobwebs clinging to Lydia that made him recoil. “She’ll make things difficult for you, that lady.”