The Last Mrs. Parrish(18)

They finally pulled into Grand Central and poured out of the train into the crowded station. Amber stayed behind Daphne as she and the girls walked up the steps and into the main terminal. Her spirits lifted as she looked around at the magnificent architecture and thought again how much she loved New York.

Daphne stopped and gathered them together. “Okay, here’s what’s on our agenda. We’re going to start by looking at all the holiday window displays, then lunch at Alice’s Teacup, then American Girl Store, and finally ice-skating at Rockefeller Center.”

Kill me now, Amber thought.

*

Amber had to admit that the window displays were fabulous, each one more elaborate than the next. Even the little princess was bewitched and stopped her whining. When they arrived at Alice’s Teacup, Amber groaned inwardly at the long line, but apparently Daphne was well known there, and they were whisked right in. Lunch was fine, no major incidents, and Amber and Daphne actually got to have a conversation longer than five minutes.

While the girls took their time eating their French toast, Amber finished her ham and cheese croissant and sipped her tea.

“Thanks again for including me, Daphne. It’s so nice to be a part of a family day this time of year.”

“Thank you. You’re making the day so much more fun for me. When Jackson bailed out, I almost canceled.” She leaned in and whispered, “As you’ve seen, Bella can be a little bit of a handful. It’s great to have some help.”

Amber felt her back go up. Was that what she was? Help?

“Wasn’t the nanny available today?” she couldn’t resist asking.

Daphne didn’t seem to notice the jab. She shook her head absently. “I’d already given her the day off since we had planned this.” She smiled brightly at Amber and squeezed her hand. “I’m so glad you came with us. This is the kind of thing I’d be doing with my sister if she were alive. Now I have a special friend to enjoy it with.”

“That’s funny. When we were looking at the beautiful animations in the store windows, I imagined how much Charlene would have loved it. Christmas was her favorite time of year.” In fact, Amber’s childhood Christmases had been mean and disappointing. But if Charlene had existed, she might have liked Christmas.

“Julie loved Christmas too. I’ve never told this to anyone, but very late on Christmas Eve each year, I write a letter to Julie.”

“What do you tell her?” Amber asked.

“All that’s happened in the last year, you know, like those Christmas letters that people send out. But these letters are different. I tell her what’s in my heart and all about her nieces—how much she would have loved them and they her. It keeps me connected to her in a way I can’t explain.”

Amber felt a brief stab of sympathy that quickly turned to envy. She had never felt that kind of love and affection for anyone in her family. She wondered what that would be like. She didn’t know quite what to say.

“Can we go to American Girl now?” Bella was standing, pulling on her coat, and Amber was grateful for the intrusion.

They left the restaurant and grabbed a cab. Amber sat in front with the driver. The inside of the car smelled of old cheese, and she wanted to gag, but as soon as she rolled the window down, Queen Bella piped up from the backseat.

“I’m cold.”

Amber gritted her teeth and put it back up.

When they arrived at Forty-Ninth and Fifth, the line going into the store went all the way around the block.

“The line is so long,” Tallulah said. “Do we really have to wait?”

Bella stomped her foot. “I need a new dress for my Bella doll. Can’t you get us in ahead of them, Mommy? Like you did at the restaurant?”

Daphne shook her head. “Afraid not, sweetie.” She gave Tallulah a beseeching look. “I did promise her.”

Tallulah looked like she wanted to cry.

Amber had an inspiration. “Say, I noticed we passed a Barnes & Noble just a few blocks back. Why don’t I take Tallulah there, and you and Bella can meet us when you finish?”

Tallulah’s eyes lit up. “Can we, Mom? Please?”

“Are you sure, Amber?” Daphne asked.

Was she ever. “Of course. This way, they’re both happy.”

“Super. Thanks, Amber.”

As she and Tallulah began to walk away, Daphne called out. “Amber, please stay with her in the store.”

She bit back a sarcastic retort. Like she’d really let the kid wander in Manhattan on her own. “I won’t take my eyes off her.”

As they headed south on Fifth Avenue, Amber seized the opportunity to get to know Tallulah better.

“You’re not into American Girl dolls?”

“Not enough to stand in line for hours. I’d much rather look at books.”

“What kinds of things do you like?”

She shrugged. “Well, books. And I like to take pictures, but with old cameras and film.”

“Really? Why not digital?”

“The resolution is better, and I’ve found that . . .”

Amber tuned out the rest of her explanation. She didn’t care. All she needed to know was what she liked, not the three paragraphs of science behind it. Tallulah was like a little professor masquerading as a kid. Amber wondered if she had any friends at all.