The Half Sister(13)

As much as Kate tries to ignore it, it pains her that that is the natural default setting of their family dynamic. It had become even more so since Lauren had had children. Kate supposes that’s what happens when a woman’s daughter has her own babies; the two of them instinctively come together, as if it’s an exclusive club that only those who have borne a child can be members of. Kate caresses her stomach, as if hoping to find a bump there. She can’t help but feel disappointed when she doesn’t.

‘Yeah, I think you’re right,’ says Lauren. ‘I was going to pop round there once I’ve dropped Noah off at school.’

‘Okay, let me know how it goes, will you?’

‘Are you not going to talk to her yourself?’ her sister asks.

‘I will do later,’ says Kate. ‘But I’m at work all day, and anyway, I’m sure that now we’ve all had a chance to think about it, we know that what that woman said yesterday was just completely farcical.’

‘So, you don’t believe her?’ asks Lauren.

Kate feels her hackles rise, unable to believe that Lauren would even feel the need to ask.

‘Of course not!’ she exclaims. ‘Why, do you?’ There’s a delay at the other end, just a few seconds, but it’s enough to give Kate a clue as to what’s coming.

‘I . . . I just think we should listen to what she has to say,’ says Lauren hesitantly.

Now it’s Kate’s turn to go quiet, as she tries to make sense of what Lauren’s suggesting.

‘I just think we should hear her out,’ Lauren goes on. ‘You never know, she might have unequivocal proof.’

‘And this is how you’re going to approach it with Mum, are you?’ asks Kate eventually.

‘Well, I’ll play it by ear,’ says Lauren.

‘May I make a suggestion?’ says Kate, unable to keep the frustration from her voice.

‘Sure.’

‘This woman—’

‘Jess,’ cuts in Lauren.

‘This woman,’ repeats Kate, ignoring her, ‘turns up, out of nowhere, at our family home, claiming to be our father’s daughter.’

‘Yes,’ says Lauren.

‘And your immediate thought is that it might be true?’

‘Well, yes,’ says Lauren. ‘Isn’t it yours?’

‘No!’ exclaims Kate. ‘See, this right here is what I’m talking about. It wouldn’t occur to me to believe it, not for even a second, yet you, having had time to sleep on it, have decided that it’s a possibility. That’s the difference between you and me, Lauren. I trusted Dad with all my heart, and I will continue to do so until my dying day. No matter what that woman may say, or what you may think.’

‘Well, then I think you’re deluded,’ says Lauren, under her breath.

‘Just do yourself a favour,’ says Kate, forcing herself not to rise to the bait, ‘don’t ever let Mum know your true feelings. The man she loved and lived with for the past forty years has been suddenly taken away from her. We might think we know what that must feel like – he was our father after all – but I don’t think we can possibly imagine how it must feel to lose your life partner, the person you woke up to every morning, the person you shared your innermost thoughts with—’

‘But—’

‘She won’t thank you for it,’ says Kate. ‘And she might never forgive you for it either.’

‘So, you think we should lie to her,’ says Lauren. ‘Just to keep her memory of Dad preserved.’

‘I won’t need to lie,’ says Kate abruptly. ‘Because the father I remember is the father I had. Nothing you or anyone else says will ever change that.’

‘We can’t just ignore what Jess is saying. If what she’s saying is true, it might just make the pain of losing Dad that little easier to bear.’

‘You’re willing to believe her because you think it’ll somehow ease our grief?’ Kate exclaims incredulously.

‘I just think that it might give us all some perspective, especially Mum, who’s not been herself since he’s been gone. If she realized that maybe he wasn’t the man she thought he was, she might not feel his loss so profoundly.’

‘Now who’s deluded?’ hisses Kate.

‘You never know,’ says Lauren. ‘Jess might even bring us closer.’

‘Over my dead body.’

‘Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that,’ says Lauren, before hanging up.





7


Lauren


Lauren was going to tell Kate that she’d seen Jess, but their conversation hadn’t gone the way she’d hoped. She doesn’t know why Kate is so adamant in shutting herself off to the possibility that their father might not have been all that they thought he was. She naively hopes that their mother isn’t going to be quite so opposed to the idea.

‘Hi, it’s only me,’ she calls out, at pains to sound normal as she lets herself into her parents’ semi-detached home. A familiar warmth immediately wraps itself around her, the smell of baking merging with the dulcet tones of BBC Radio 2’s Ken Bruce, as he quizzes a contestant on PopMaster. This is Lauren’s safe place, though she has to admit it doesn’t feel quite so dependable since her father’s been gone. It shouldn’t make a difference, not in the scheme of things, not when she hadn’t confided in him about what was going on with Simon. But still, if she was honest, she’d known that if it ever hit the fan, like really kicked off, her dad would have been the first in line to protect her.