The Golden Tower (Magisterium #5)(13)

This must have been what it felt like to be Constantine Madden.

The black fire shot from his fingers. It was as if he were Zeus; he could burn the whole world and it would be easy. With movements of his fingers, he guided the destructive fire, striking down other mages as they tried to run. Fire burst from the roofs of buildings. A stone clock tower was burning. He had no counterweight, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. Nothing mattered but power.



Call sat up, gasping. His hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat. It took him several long moments to remember who he was and where he was — in his own bed in the Magisterium.

He kicked the covers away, hoping the shock of cold air would wake him up and push him further from the dream. It had been horrible, in a wonderful sort of way …

Are you all right? Aaron sounded worried.

I think so, Call said. I mean, yeah. It was a nightmare, is all.

It was Constantine, Aaron said. His memories. It had to have been.

I’ve had weird dreams before, Call said. They don’t necessarily mean anything.

I’m sorry about before, Aaron said. Let me tell you what I found, okay? Then we can maybe figure out how to handle … kissing … while I’m still here.

Call sighed. “Probably by just not doing it,” he said glumly. At least in his bedroom he could talk out loud to Aaron without anyone thinking he’d lost his mind. “Okay, shoot.”

There’s something locked up in your head, Aaron said. I don’t know how to describe it, but being in here is like being in a big space with windows. I can look out of them and I’m looking out of your eyes. There are currents, emotions, that move past me, and your thoughts are like words in my mind. But when we weren’t talking, before, it was like I bumped up against a locked door. In the middle of the room. There’s something closed away inside it.

“Like a repressed memory?” Call said, puzzled.

I think it’s Constantine’s memories, said Aaron. I think someone shut them away in here so you wouldn’t have access to them.

“Why would anyone do that?”

I don’t know. Aaron sounded frustrated. Maybe when he jumped into your body, because you were a baby, your mind couldn’t handle all of the memories, so they got shut away.

It made a kind of sense. “Or maybe they would have made me realize I was an adult, trapped in a baby’s body. Maybe he thought that would make him go insane?”

I don’t know, but I think we should open them.

Call was up and out of the bed, shaking his head, though he knew Aaron couldn’t see him. “No. No!”

Why not?

“The whole time I was with Master Joseph, every time I was around Anastasia Tarquin, all they wanted was for me to remember being Constantine Madden, because they thought those memories would, I don’t know, overwrite my own. What if the memories make me stop being Call?”

Aaron was quiet for a long moment. I guess I figured they would just be memories and it would be like the way I am in your head. I’m still me, even if I hear your thoughts.

“But Constantine’s soul was my soul. Maybe they will feel like my memories. But even if they don’t, what if they’re really, really bad?” He was afraid, he realized, of more than just the possibility of turning into Constantine. He was afraid of facing all the terrible things that Constantine had really done. What if Call remembered every ugly, awful thing? What if he had to remember the death of his own mother?

I guess I didn’t think about any of that, Aaron said. But if you ever want to look at the memories, I’m here in your head, too. I will do everything I can to make sure that you stay you, okay?

Call felt like a coward. “Let me think about it.”

It was early, but he knew he wasn’t going to be able to get back to sleep. Instead, he got up, got his towel and his change of clothes, and headed to the bathing room, Havoc padding along behind him. He washed up quickly while Havoc popped soap bubbles with his tongue, sneezing and then growling at the bubbles.

After the bath, Call headed back into his room and was startled by Jasper, shirtless, doing stretches in the common area.

“What are you doing?” Call demanded.

“Limbering up for the day ahead,” Jasper said, as though Call were the weird one. “Getting into the right mental place for magic.”

“Ah,” Call said. “Sure.”

By the time he got back from walking Havoc, both of the girls were up, Gwenda with a purple silk cap over her twists, Tamara yawning as she took her toothpaste into the bathing area. The reality that Jasper and Gwenda were really Call’s new roommates and in his apprentice group was sinking in and he still wasn’t sure how he felt about it. On the plus side, at least they hadn’t walked in on him and Tamara kissing.

Call had just put down some kibble for Havoc when the door opened and Master Rufus came in. “Today, apprentices, we’re going to continue to learn about metal, from both a scientific and magical perspective. Call, you will be joining us after you meet with a member of the Assembly.”

“That doesn’t sound good,” Call said.

“This is an informal meeting and Mr. Rajavi has assured me that very little time will be taken away from your classes.” Master Rufus didn’t seem particularly concerned, which was reassuring. And Call knew Mr. Rajavi. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.