The Dating Plan(44)
Daisy turned as Liam’s brother walked into the room. Shorter than Liam by about two inches, with the same wide shoulders but on a stocky frame, Brendan was an older, more rugged version of his brother. Individually, his features were rough, but together, with his thick blond hair and the same intense blue eyes as Liam, he had a dangerous appeal.
Brendan’s gaze flicked from Daisy to Liam and his voice was pure disdain. “Christ, I can’t believe you are actually carrying out this charade. What total bullshit.”
“Bullshit,” Jaxon repeated, his eyes wide with delight. “Fecking bullshit.”
Brendan puffed out his chest. “See, even a child knows it’s a load of cr—”
“Brendan!” A slight, fair-haired woman ran out of the kitchen and scooped Jaxon up. “Not in front of Jaxon.”
“Is this true?” Fiona asked after a protesting Jaxon had been quickly carried upstairs.
“We are engaged.” Liam put his arm around Daisy’s shoulders. “I’ve known Daisy for almost twenty years, but it was Grandpa’s death that made me realize life is too short to waste.”
Damn, he was impressive. Daisy had never mastered the art of lying on cue. Deceit required imagination and improvisation and she leaned toward logic and planning.
“That is so true,” Roisin said. “The world is a lonely place full of lonely people. If you find someone you can connect with, someone who can take you out of yourself and bring you joy, you can’t let it go. My shaman felt that connection with me after we drank our ayahuasca brew.”
“I’m sure he did,” Fiona muttered. “A close and intimate connection.”
“Then why wasn’t she at the funeral?” Brendan challenged. “Or the wake? Why did you never bring her to meet any of us? You didn’t say anything until you found out Grandpa had given the distillery to me.”
“We were . . .” He trailed off and Daisy panicked, terrified he wouldn’t be able to wing this one. What could she say? What made sense? She wasn’t good with making things up. Maybe something close to the truth.
“He cheated on me.” She blurted out the words, her heart pounding so hard she could barely hear through the rush of blood in her ears.
Liam stared at her in shock. “You don’t have to—”
“With Madison. My old boss.” She’d put her foot in it now, might as well keep going with a story she knew.
“I had to quit the job I loved.” She felt both relief and dread when Liam didn’t interrupt, leaving her the center of attention. “We were on a break, but I brought him to the company picnic hoping to reconcile, and he hooked up with Madison.”
“Poor love.” Roisin patted her hand. “Men. Always thinking with their cocks.”
“Roisin! For feck sake,” Seamus said. “Watch your language. She’s just a wee girl.”
“She’s not that wee.” Roisin gave Daisy an appraising look. “She knows what a cock is or she wouldn’t be with our Liam. Isn’t that right?”
“Um . . .” Daisy’s brain had cock on repeat and she couldn’t form any words. She’d never heard the word cock uttered once in any Patel family gathering. Nor a single swear word. She’d never even had a conversation about sex with anyone in her family, except with Layla.
“Look at her face.” Fiona clucked her tongue like a mother hen. “She’s only here five minutes and you’re already on about cocks. Give her another drink before she faints dead away.”
“He’s a young man,” Seamus said. “You can’t blame him for wanting a bit of a rightie. It’s a hardship looking as good as Liam and me. The ladies are always wanting a piece of you. Some weekends I had so many, I wore myself out.”
“Jesus Christ.” Fitz groaned. “We’re going to scare the girl away. She’ll think we’re all crazy.”
“You know what’s crazy?” Roisin said. “An ayahuasca trip. That’s crazy. The first night I took the brew I saw myself floating in Ma’s womb. And then I had the purge. In a communal tent. I had to get on all fours because it was coming out both ends and I couldn’t reach the buckets. And the force. It was like a fire hose. I ripped a hole in the side of the tent and hit a tree ten yards away. Felt like pure acid. I couldn’t sit for a week.”
“Why are we talking about Aunt Roisin’s crazy ayahuasca trip?” Brendan raised his voice in frustration. “The bigger issue here is a fraudulent marriage.”
Fitz held up his hands palms forward. “It’s their relationship, their business. Just like your aunt’s psychedelic hallucinated shit is her business even though she has to bring it up in every conversation.”
“It was all over me,” Roisin continued. “I didn’t hallucinate that.”
“I thought you just said it was all over a tree ten yards out of the tent.” Fitz crossed his arms over his chest.
“That was the second time. The first time I hit the shaman.”
Fitz shook his head. “I’m not going to ask what he was doing behind you. Why can’t you just get an office job? I would be thrilled to hear stories about accounting errors or missing pens.”
“I’m going to get Daisy a drink.” Liam pulled Daisy toward the kitchen, although she wasn’t in a hurry to leave. His family took bluntness to a whole new level.