The Chain (The Secret of Spellshadow Manor #3)(90)

“Why did you not tell us who you were?” Natalie demanded. “Why did you keep such a secret from us?”

Alex heard the subtext in Natalie’s bitter words—why did you keep such a secret from me? He could see it in the glitter of her dark eyes, still rimmed with red from the tears she had shed over their beloved Gaze.

Helena looked crestfallen. “Believe me, I told no one about you. I haven’t breathed a word—not to my mother, not to anyone. I know you must find it hard to trust me, after learning who I am, but trust that I have been looking out for you all—all this time. It’s all I have wanted to do.” She stared down at her feet, scuffing the toe of her boot against the flagstones. The earnest note in her voice had returned, and it was hard not to believe her. Still, Alex could not suppress his suspicions about why she didn’t tell them who she was sooner, when she was someone of such importance. It seemed Natalie couldn’t suppress her doubts either.

“But why did you not tell us? If you had wanted us to trust you, you would have told us who you were,” she said, hurt bleeding into her words.

Helena looked up, her expression suddenly bold. “You honestly don’t see why? Any of you? I didn’t tell you because I wanted you to treat me like a normal, ordinary person. All my life people have tiptoed around me and wanted things from me. I just wanted you to know me—is that so hard to believe?” she said bitterly. “Besides, if I’d told you, you’d have run a mile! You’d never have spoken to me, let alone trusted me, if I’d told you the truth. I know you’d all like to believe you’re better than that, but the truth is… you aren’t. You know I’m right,” she sighed.

Alex could see the honesty in that, and he wanted to believe in her, but he was no longer certain he could trust anyone or anything but himself. It brought to mind Aamir’s words. A secret is no longer a secret, once it is shared. The only way to keep a plan private was to tell no one. It was a hard truth he was finally coming to terms with, for himself as much as for the others; the only way to keep everyone safe was to hide the truth from them.

One good thing to come out of so much negativity was the knowledge that the evening’s events seemed to have snapped the others out of their happy-go-lucky trance. Alex could see that the dazed expressions and easy smiles had gone, replaced with a keen intent to break free once more, their focus restored by Gaze’s death and the secrecy of their closest ally. Sabotage was the order of the day, and they were all ready to get going. He had waited days to have them all on board with as much enthusiasm as he had. He only wished they had come to it a different way, without anyone having to die.

“I suppose I’d better go,” said Helena miserably. “I know you don’t want to, after what has happened, but you should get back to your rooms before the guards do their rounds… Please don’t think too badly of me. I’m still here to help you.”

With that thought playing on their minds, Helena left, disappearing into the darkness. It was the opportunity Alex had been waiting for, as he gathered everyone together in a huddle. If what Gaze said was right, about his actions in the arena meaning they were in graver, more immediate danger then he had believed, then they were running out of time. They no longer had the luxury of ambling happily through life at Stillwater. If they ever wanted to get out, it had to be soon. Still, he wasn’t sure tonight was the night to discuss a plan of action—his mind was foggy with grief, and he suspected the others would be in a similar state. They needed time to decompress and gather their thoughts, with Jari alongside them. He only hoped it could wait until tomorrow.

“We need to work quickly,” whispered Alex. “We should meet tomorrow, once lessons are over, and come up with our plan of action.”

“What about Helena?” asked Natalie. She was obviously still reluctant to leave out her friend, even after what she had admitted.

Alex shrugged. “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. We may need her, but who knows how far we can trust her? Let’s keep her at arm’s length for now, and bring her in if and when we need to.”

The group nodded, satisfied with the idea.

“Shall I tell Jari?” asked Aamir. “I spoke to the medical mage today, who said they were going to discharge him tomorrow morning anyway. He’s supposed to be starting classes with you two.” He nodded toward Ellabell and Natalie.

“Yeah, get him to come along,” agreed Alex. “You should probably fill him in on what happened tonight,” he added with a grimace, knowing Jari wouldn’t take the news too well. At least the rest of them had had a chance to say goodbye.

Aamir sighed. “I’ll tell him.”

“Where should we meet? Is anywhere safe enough?” Ellabell asked.

“We should meet in the library. I’ve no idea if it’s safe, but it has the books we might need. Plus, it’s huge, so we can hopefully find somewhere away from prying eyes,” he replied, though he wasn’t sure such a place existed within the walls of Stillwater House. He’d started to feel the prickle of eyes upon him wherever he went these days.

Parting ways, Alex knew nobody would be sleeping well that night.





Chapter 36





The next day, the quintet assembled in the grand library, with its gold-flecked marble floors and trickling water features, pooling away, down the abyss in the center of the room. Other students eyed them cautiously, but most of the five were too distracted by the beauty of the place to notice. It was only Alex, who was already familiar with the alluring, airy space and its entire universe of books, who noticed the wary observation of those around.