The Anomaly(63)

“But that’s not fair,” Feather said.



I blinked. Hesitated. Realized I should keep talking.

“Actually, it is,” I said. “Because she’d asked me, several times. She’d asked what specific things had made me start to suspect. And I’d had to make some up, back-fitting things I’d only put together since it came out in the open. That first lie trapped me into others. There had been a lot of brutal honestly flying around. I’d asked for it. Demanded it. She’d provided, even when it made her look bad and feel terrible. And meanwhile I’d been lying to her face. It wasn’t even the fact that her best friend fed me the tip, though that was not ideal because suddenly that woman’s motivations were called into question and eventually there was a very loud phone conversation between Kristy and her. They’ve never spoken since.

“But that wasn’t the real thing, the bad thing. The bad thing was the lies. A small lie is just as much a lie as a big one. And like one of those smart dead guys said—it’s not the content of the particular lie you told me that’s the problem; it’s that I can’t believe you anymore. That’s what destroys everything. Suddenly, instead of being one of the closest couples I’d ever known, we were people who’d been prepared to lie to each other, time after time. We’d built separate worlds out of things that weren’t true, and were living in them alone—rather than inhabiting the real world together. That breaks a spell. Over the next few months we spiraled slowly in opposite directions. I tried to pull us back. She did, too. We really tried. But we were through.”

“It’s still not fair.”

“It is what it is, and what’s done is done. But my point is I get how corrosive lies become. I understand the need to be able to live with yourself, to not have something lurking back in the dark of your mind, stopping you from being at peace. Are you going to be able to live with that?”

“Nice try,” she said. “Yes, Nolan, I will. It is what it is, as you would say. It’s been nice talking, but I really am going to go now. I’ve got things to do.”

“What things?”

“They don’t concern you. So—did it help, sharing all that with me?”

“Not really.”

“That’s a shame. But I wouldn’t want Ken to think you’ve lost your touch, so here’s a little information in return. The paintings you saw are fifty thousand years old—so, yes, a long time before humans are conventionally agreed to have gotten to this continent—and they’re part of the jigsaw I know you’re smart enough to put together. Kincaid did. Well, Jordan was the brains on that part. He wrote a paper when he got back to Washington, and submitted to the Smithsonian right away. They buried it. Immediately, and very deep. We have that paper. We always knew what they’d found. It was only a matter of waiting until the time was right. And all we needed was the one thing they kept secret, the thing you were smart enough to work out—where this place actually was.

“And you’ve also got the building blocks to figure out what they figured out, but they’re not all in those rooms, and they’re not all in your head, either. There’s a big story here, Nolan—a huge story. An arc. Don’t let me down. I believe in you. You’re going to want to know, and you deserve to.”

“Just tell—”

“That’s it, babe. I’m done.”



I didn’t get up for a while. She’d gone, for real this time. I could tell, somehow.

I didn’t try to get anywhere with what she’d said. I wasn’t sure it meant anything and I was worn out, my head fuzzy and broken. I didn’t feel bad for having told her what I’d told her. It’s old news.

And I hadn’t told the whole truth, either.

Of course I had sex with Kristy’s friend that night. I really am that fucking dumb. It was a drunken mistake and I admitted it. It was what killed us in the end. You could argue that event B wouldn’t have happened without event A, which is true, but all that would prove is you’ve never been in a long-term relationship. Logic is never the issue and there is no court of appeal. And as Molly had said, it’s not like it’s big stuff. None of it’s big stuff. Unless you were there.

Unless it’s your stuff.



I think I fell asleep for a few minutes, or at least nodded into a half doze.

Then I heard something coming toward me in the darkness.

It wasn’t coming fast, but it wasn’t slow. It was approaching at its own pace. A soft padding sound, with little clicks that sounded like claws on rock.

I didn’t move.

There wasn’t anywhere I could go.

The sound got closer, and closer. Then it stopped.

The thing, whatever it was, felt as though it was only a yard or so from me now. There was a faint, visceral odor, like wet fur. A noise, like a sniff, then another.

A quiet, moist sound, like jaws opening.

I did my best to make my peace with God, the world, and everything and everybody within it.

Then I heard it trotting away.





Chapter

38



They arrived back in the main room soon after I did, the dim glow from their lights approaching out of the two tunnels. In the darkness it was like watching some creature’s face, in which one eye was getting bigger than the other. Then for a moment I was convinced it was instead a pair of cars on a highway in the fog. My desiccated brain was playing, exhaustedly coming up with interpretations of the scant information presented to it. Ken and Molly eventually emerged from their passage well ahead of the other two.