Surprise Me(38)

‘I love it. Love it,’ Dan repeats emphatically. ‘And now, my lady …’ He gives a little bow. ‘Your carriage awaits.’

Luckily the man on the phone at the Barbican Comedy Festival was really sympathetic and had another couple on standby, who were thrilled to get the Tim Wender tickets. (I bet they were.) The second cab wasn’t so thrilled to be cancelled, but it’s a firm we use a lot, so at least they let us off the fare.

On the plus side, Dan’s enthusiasm is infectious, and as we travel along in the cab that he booked, I’m really starting to feel excited. He has something major to spring on me, I know it.

Although weirdly, we’re not heading into town, which is what I would have expected. We’re heading to an unfamiliar part of Clapham. What goes on here?

The car pulls up outside a small restaurant in a side street. It’s called Munch, and I peer out doubtfully. Munch? Should I have heard of that? Is it one of these amazing tiny places where you sit on an uncomfortable bench but the food is award-winning?

‘So.’ As Dan turns to me, he looks all shiny-faced with anticipation. ‘You wanted to be surprised, right?’

‘Yes,’ I say, laughing at his expression. ‘Yes!’

OK, I’m properly excited now. What’s this all about? What?

Our driver opens the door and Dan gestures for me to get out. As he’s paying the cab driver, I scan the menu board on the pavement and see that it’s a vegan restaurant. Interesting. Not what I would have expected. Unless— ‘Oh my God.’ I turn to Dan in sudden alarm. ‘Are you turning vegan? Is that your surprise? I mean, if so, great!’ I hastily add. ‘Well done!’

Dan laughs. ‘No, I’m not turning vegan.’

‘Oh, right. So … you just felt like being healthy?’

‘Not that either.’

Dan ushers me to the entrance, and I push open the door. It’s one of those earthy, worthy places, I can see at once. Lots of terracotta. Wooden ceiling fans. A ‘Pick your own Mint Tea’ planter. (Actually, that’s quite fun. Maybe I’ll steal that idea for dinner parties.) ‘Wow!’ I say. ‘This is—’

‘Oh, this isn’t the surprise.’ Dan cuts me off, almost bursting with pride. ‘That’s the surprise.’

He points at a far corner table, and I follow his gaze. There’s a girl sitting there. A girl with long brown hair and really skinny legs encased in black jeans. Who is it? Do I know her? I think I recognize her— Oh my God, of course. It’s that girl from uni. She did … chemistry? Biochemistry? What’s her name again?

Suddenly I realize Dan is waiting for a reaction from me. And not just any old reaction.

‘No … way!’ I say, mustering all my energy. ‘Dan! You didn’t!’

‘I did!’ Dan beams at me, as though he’s presenting me with all my dreams at once.

My mind is working frantically. What the hell is going on? Why is some random person from uni sitting at our lunch table? And how do I find out her name?

‘So!’ I say as we give our jackets to a girl with about sixteen earrings in her right ear. ‘Amazing! How did you – what—’

‘How many times have you said to me you wish you’d kept in touch with Claire?’ Dan is pink-faced with delight. ‘So you know what I thought? I thought: Let’s make it happen.’

Claire. She’s called Claire. Of course she is. But this is nuts! I’ve never even thought about Claire since university. What on earth— Oh my God, Claire.

He’s talking about Claire from the art course.

Somehow, I manage to keep smiling as a waitress leads us towards the corner table. There was this girl called Claire whom I met on an art course, years ago. She was really great, with a brilliant sense of humour, and we had a few lunches but then our friendship fizzled out. She’s the one I’ve been talking about.

Not this Claire.

Fuck, fuck …

As we reach the table, my face feels stiff. What am I going to do? ‘We meet at last!’ Dan greets Claire like an old friend. ‘Thank you so much for going along with all my cloak-and-dagger plans …’

‘No problem,’ says Claire in a flat voice. She always had a flat way about her, Claire. ‘Hi, Sylvie.’ She pushes back her chair and stands up, taller than me and make-up free. ‘Long time.’

I glance at Dan. He’s watching the pair of us fondly, as though expecting us to fall into each other’s arms like that YouTube video of the pet lion seeing its owners again.

‘Claire!’ I exclaim in the most emotional voice I can drum up. ‘This is … It’s been too long!’ I hug her bony, resistant body. ‘I just … Here you are! I don’t know what to say!’

‘Well.’ Claire shrugs. ‘Uni was a long time ago.’

‘There should be a bottle of fizz on the table,’ says Dan fretfully. ‘I’ll just go and sort that out … Claire chose the restaurant,’ he adds to me. ‘Isn’t it great?’

‘Fab!’ I say, and take a seat on a really uncomfortable painted wooden chair.

‘So, this was a surprise,’ says Claire impassively.

‘Yes! So, what exactly happened?’ I try to sound casual. ‘How did this all get arranged?’