Side Trip(74)

“But what if—”

Dylan gently pressed a finger to her lips. “No what-ifs.” He rolled with her to her back and kissed her neck, skimmed his tongue around her nipple, drew the bud into his mouth. He nudged her legs apart and she let him work his way inside. He lifted his head and looked down at her face. “I chose to ask you for a ride. You chose to let me come with you. I chose to be your friend, Joy, and this”—he pushed deeper—“I choose you. And you choose . . . ?”

“I choose you.”





CHAPTER 26





AFTER


Joy

Joy hears Mark come in through the front door of their town house, home from the gym. He drops his workout bag by the door and keys on the table in the entryway. She glances at the oven clock. It’s after five in the evening. He’s been at the gym since two and, aside from a short break to watch the news, she’s been at the kitchen table working on her laptop since one. She should pull herself away, turn off the TV she left on in the front parlor, and start dinner. But the product spreadsheet she’s configuring for Surfari Soaps & Salves, the online organic skin care boutique she hopes to launch in a couple of months, is almost done. She’s been mixing formulas, testing products, and working part-time as a property manager at Larson Brokers, Mark’s family’s company, in the interim. She just needs a few more minutes on this spreadsheet; then she’s that much closer to seeing Surfari become a reality.

“I’m almost done here, then I’ll get dinner started,” she says, elated with her progress. She hasn’t felt this excited about her achievements since her competitive surfing days.

She briefly looks up from her screen when Mark enters the kitchen and takes in his appearance. “Were you at the gym this whole time?” Usually he showers there before he leaves, but he’s still wearing his workout clothes. His hair sticks up from running his fingers through it. The back of his neck is red and she wonders if he’s been rubbing the area, trying to work out the knots. He carries his stress in his shoulders and neck, and the past few months have been wearing. His family’s company has been trying to close a large deal. Lost in her own plans, she hasn’t been present to support him the way he needs.

He pulls out a chair beside her and sits down. He leans forward and, elbow on thigh, shoves his hand into his crusty hair. He looks at her and sighs, lets his hand drop.

She leans away from her laptop and frowns. He looks exhausted. “Everything all right?”

He doesn’t answer. Stretching out a leg, he gets his phone from the side pocket of his shorts. He cradles the device in his hands and slowly flips it end over end.

She angles her chair to face him. “Did something happen at the gym? Are you hurt?” Her gaze roams his body, searching for an injury.

“How would you describe our marriage?” He doesn’t look at her. His attention is on the phone. Over and over it goes.

“We’ve had our rough patches, but I think we’re doing okay, don’t you?”

“I thought so.”

“But . . . ?” she prompts when he doesn’t say anything further. “Mark, what’s going on?” He woke her with kisses, they made love, and then they had coffee and read the paper in bed. They went to brunch around eleven, and after, Mark went to the gym. Aside from the stress of the deal he’s trying to finalize, he seemed fine when he left. Did she miss something?

Mark finally lifts his eyes to hers. His are full of hurt. “Do you want children?”

The hair on her nape rises. She picks up the pen beside her hand, clicks it twice, sets it back down. “I do, but now probably isn’t the best time to start trying again.” She gestures at her laptop. He agreed to wait after she’d implored for his support. Give her venture the chance to thrive because Joy had realized she couldn’t simultaneously handle the stress of starting a family and a new business. Mark was suggesting micronized progesterone supplements. He’d read articles, and pregnancy success after multiple miscarriages seemed promising. Joy wasn’t sure she wanted to go the route of hormonal therapy.

Mark tightly grips his phone. He looks away briefly before meeting her eyes again. “Do you want to have children with me?” The last two words come out as a harsh whisper as if he had to force them past his lips.

Shove them over a cliff is more like it.

Joy looks down at her keyboard, scared to answer. Mark had been right. Her venture would take precedence over family planning and Joy can’t deny that she intentionally let it. But that doesn’t explain why he’s looking at her as though she’s betrayed him. She puts down the pen so that she doesn’t click it madly.

“I want kids, Joy. I want them with you. But . . .”

He opens his Facebook app and brings up her profile. He slides the phone across the table. She peers at the screen and her stomach sours. Dead center is her relationship status. It’s complicated.

Her gaze darts to his face, her expression instantly apologetic.

She forgot to change her status back to married. And then just plain forgot. She hasn’t posted anything since that night out with Taryn. She hasn’t even looked at her profile in months, and avoided social media.

“I can explain—” she starts, feeling horrible that she could be that neglectful of his feelings and disrespectful of their marriage.