Shattered Mirror (Eve Duncan #23)(68)

“Don’t do that to me,” he said unsteadily. “I can’t lose you, too.”

“Not fair,” she murmured. “I know I’m not being fair. I should be stronger for you. But it’s Michael, Joe. I couldn’t stand that I—” She drew him down and held him tight. “But maybe we won’t have to do it. Just hold me for a moment and let me…” Hallucination? Survival in the only way left to her? Or Michael? Oh God, let it be Michael. “Just give me a little time, then we’ll talk…”





CHAPTER

12



“There’s such a thing as wanting something so desperately that you will it into being,” Joe said in a low voice as he stroked her hair. “I don’t know whether it’s mental or the real thing. But there’s no doubt you want Michael back so badly that you could refuse to accept reality and make up your own scenario.”

“I know that I could do that,” Eve said unsteadily. “But I’m hoping that I didn’t. It felt like Michael, Joe. You know that from the moment he was conceived, I could feel him, sense him. I could tell what he was thinking. Later, as he grew older, it faded away. But this was him, Joe. He was upset because I was hurting so badly, and he couldn’t get to me. He said I might have to come to him.” She paused. “I imagine you know what I thought he might mean.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“And he knew also. But he said, ‘No,’ and then, ‘Dad’s wrong.’”

“I want to believe that,” he said thickly. “Lord, I want to believe it.”

“I think I have to believe it,” she said unevenly. “I’m not certain I won’t turn catatonic again if I don’t. Michael wouldn’t like that.” She pushed him away and sat up. “So now I have to act like a coherent human being instead of an emotional wreck. If it’s true, there’s a chance that Michael might need us.” She brushed the hair away from her face. “How badly hurt am I?”

“Not bad. Severe bruising. Your cheek looks swollen and purple like a truck hit you. But the EMTs weren’t worried about your physical health.”

“No, they thought I was heading for a nervous breakdown.” She hoped they were wrong. If she had purpose, if she had a miracle, if she had a chance for Michael, they would be wrong. She was barefoot but she was dressed in an oversized blue man’s shirt and loose khaki pants, “What happened to my clothes?”

“The same thing that happened to mine. Blast. We were too close. But they scrounged a pair of pants and shirt for me, too, from one of the merchants in another shopping center.”

“Call Cara and tell her I need—” Her gaze flew to Joe’s face. “Cara?”

“She’s outside. She and Darcy and Jock got here about thirty minutes ago. I told her she couldn’t see you until after I told you.”

“I’ll have to see her right away. She loves Michael. She must be devastated.”

“Everyone loves Michael. But she has Jock and Darcy. She’s not alone.”

“But sometimes it seems that way, doesn’t it? One person goes away and it seems like the whole world is—” She stopped. “Okay, you go out and talk to them while I pull myself together.” She smiled. “Be sure to let them know what great delusions I’m having. It will save me from explaining, and I really don’t want to go through that craziness.”

“They’ll understand regardless, Eve.” He headed for the door. “Take your time before you decide to come out. What you’re going to see will make you want to turn around and run back inside.”

*

Joe was right, Eve thought sickly, as she opened the vehicle door and stepped outside. The formerly small, charming, square looked like a postnuclear disaster site. The shops were almost all totally leveled and on fire. The fire department had been called, and some of the fires had been put out on the end units, but the ones burning in the middle were still feeding each other.

Red and gold.

Red.

Red flame, eating away everything it touched.

Fifty dead. It had touched at least fifty, Joe had said.

TV cameras. Police. Yellow tapes encircling the entire square.

Her gaze was drawn toward the place where the Ice Cream Emporium had stood, but she could no longer tell where it had been. The raging fire had made everything along that stretch one huge flaming conglomeration.

“Eve!” Cara was running toward her, tears running down her cheeks. “I’m so sorry. Maybe if I’d seen that scrap of material sooner. Maybe if I’d—” She was in Eve’s arms, holding her close. “I should have been here for you. Maybe if I—”

“Shh, if you give me one more ‘maybe,’ I’ll be very upset with you.” She held her tight an instant longer, then stepped back. “We could all play that word game into infinity and it wouldn’t help. No one is to blame but Rory Norwalk.” She was still staring in horror at the scene before her. “And no one could ever forgive him for it.”

“For nothing.” Darcy was suddenly beside her, her gaze fixed on the inferno, her voice harsh with bitterness. “Like Sylvie. All those people died for nothing. It wasn’t only Michael, he wanted to show you how powerful he was, what he could do.”