See Me(98)

Though she invited him to brunch, Colin begged off with his apologies, citing a number of upcoming exams he had to study for before working another shift that evening. When she arrived at her parents’ home, she was pleased to learn that Smokey – the name her parents had chosen for the dog – now had his own rhinestone collar, bed, and various toys strewn throughout the living room, but he seemed most content when snuggled against her father. In the kitchen, Carmen couldn’t stop humming. For her part, Serena talked more about Steve than she ever had before. “Okay, maybe it’s getting a little serious,” she admitted, eventually submitting to her mother’s grilling.

At the table, it was Felix’s turn to ask about Steve, and all Maria could do was smile. Between her career, her family, and now Colin, things were on the way up. As they cleared the table, Maria realized again that she was no longer obsessing about the man in the baseball hat, partly because of everything else going on, but also because there’d been no sign of him lately.

She wanted to think he’d given up – that he’d finished rattling her cage. But as much as she’d enjoyed the temporary reprieve, she wasn’t yet ready to believe it was completely over.

Before a rainbow, after all, there’s usually a storm.





The weather was too cool to paddleboard, and since Colin was occupied, Maria spent the rest of the afternoon and evening trying to catch up on office work. With Lynn absent and Barney operating at less than full capacity, the fact that she’d be leaving in three weeks made her feel a bit guilty. Not guilty enough to change her mind, but enough to keep her at the MacBook until her documents became a blur and writing became pointless.

When she awoke the next morning, Maria found herself wondering about the coming week – how much worse the mood at the office was going to be – and whether anyone else had made the decision to leave. Most of the partners were as distracted as Barney and Ken, which meant work was probably backlogged in every department, and making new hires was going to be tough once word of the firm’s troubles leaked out. No doubt it already had.

For now, she resolved to make her own departure as painless for Barney as possible. Hitching her purse over her shoulder, she grabbed her briefcase and headed out the door, her eyes flashing to the doormat.

It took a moment to process what she was seeing before her breath caught in her throat.

A wilted rose, with petals turning black, along with a note.

You will know how it feels.

Almost like she was dreaming, her feet remained rooted to the doorstep, because she knew there would be more. On the railing near the steps was another rotting rose that drooped under the weight of another card. Willing her feet to move forward, she stepped over the flower on her doormat and moved closer to read:

Why did you hate her?

The parking lot outside her door was deserted, the sidewalk empty; no cars she didn’t recognize. Her mouth was dry as she locked the door behind her and lifted the rose from the mat. Grabbing the flower that had been threaded through the railing, she forced herself to walk down the steps, her eyes scanning her car.

As she’d feared, her tires had been slashed. On the windshield, an envelope was tucked beneath the wiper.

Later, she’d be amazed at how calmly she’d handled the discoveries, at the clarity of her thoughts. When she reached for the envelope, she thought about fingerprints and how best to read the letter without damaging any evidence and held the envelope at the creases. In that moment, she felt no panic; rather, she was overcome with a slow, sinking sensation, a recognition of inevitability. Somehow, some way, she’d known this was coming.

The letter, computer generated, was printed on a single sheet of unlined printer paper, the kind that could be purchased at any office supply store. The final line, however, had been handwritten in boxy, almost childlike lettering.

You don’t think I know what you did? You DON’T THINK I KNOW WHO WAS BEHIND ALL OF IT? You don’t THINK I can SEE INTO YOUR MIND and know what YOU DID! You have taken THE BLOOD OF THE INNOCENT

Your HEART IS FILLED WITH POISON and you are THE DESTROYER! You POISON and you WILL NOT GET AWAY WITH IT You will know how it feels, because I am IN CONTROL NOW

I am the living INNOCENT ONE

SEE ME just as I see you!



When she finished the letter, Maria read it a second time, feeling physically ill. The disintegrating rose was still on the windshield and she reached for it, grouping it with the others in a gruesome bouquet.

Turning away from her car, she started back toward her condo, her limbs heavy with dread. The signs, she realized, had been obvious, and she’d willfully ignored them. All at once, memories sparked like blinding visions before her: Gerald Laws being interviewed by the police, with his neatly parted hair and white teeth; Cassie Manning, her young face distorted with fear; Cassie’s father, Avery, frighteningly certain of Laws’s intentions and possessed of a burning intensity himself; Cassie’s mother, Eleanor, mousy and silent and above all, frightened. And finally Lester, the nail-chewing, nervous brother who’d sent her so many terrible notes after Cassie’s death.

Those awful notes, reflecting his gradually escalating anger. Like Laws’s letters to Cassie while he was in prison.

The first step in a pattern…

On the way up the stairs to her door, Maria’s cell phone rang. Serena. She ignored the call, needing to talk to Colin. She needed him to make her feel safe; here and now, she felt exposed. With shaking hands, she dialed him, wondering how soon he’d be able to make it to her place.