Second First Impressions(92)
I really enjoyed the recent release by your client, Greer Johnson’s It’s Not All About You, which further convinced me I’d be a good fit for your agency.
I am now seeking representation for my debut nonfiction self-help book, The Sasaki Method.
This is the survival guide tucked in your backpack when hacking through the Tinder jungle. It’s the book to give to a friend who’s been off the market for a while, stuck in their shell, Too Busy for This Nonsense, or in any way feeling like they’ve missed the boat. Written with the tone of “annoyingly upbeat, nosy little sister” (source: my older sister,Genevieve), The Sasaki Method asks the reader to commit to an eight-week program of introspective goal setting and practical exercises. Self-love is the primary goal, then opening up the individual to romantic love. Hetero relationships are not referred to as the “norm,” and the language and case studies are inclusive.
If any challenge is made to my credentials, I will only have to reference the number of successful true-love pairings I have orchestrated. I am a modern-day Emma Woodhouse. This is my gift and I want to share it.
In combination with the book will be an IOS app (currently in beta testing), and I have also recorded four podcast episodes. I believe this gives us options for establishing a stable marketing platform. I also have full synopsis prepared for two further books in this series: The Sasaki Meaning (identifying signals the Universe is sending you) and The Sasaki Redemption (how to redeem yourself in today’s cancel culture). I have identified an imprint at Bexley and Gamin that I believe would be an ideal home for my books. I’d love to talk more about this with you.
Please find attached a sample of The Sasaki Method, and I remain on standby to submit a full manuscript if you should request it.
Yours,
Melanie Sasaki
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FOREWORD
We all have a superpower, and mine is helping others find true love.
I’ve been this way as long as I can remember. Each of my Barbies was in a deeply committed relationship with a Ken doll— or another Barbie (I’ve always been an ally). I wasn’t dressing up as a bride; I was throwing petals on my friend. I didn’t have my own love affairs in high school, but instead was the one engineering promposals and connecting unrequited crushes.
Perhaps my belief in love comes from my father. He’s Japanese, and he has always told me folk stories about the red string of fate—the idea that you and another are tied together, finding your way back to each other. Sometimes the string ties two individuals together who have something to learn from each other. Other times, it’s true love. By day, I run activities programs for seniors, and they are less poetic about it: “There’s someone for everyone, ain’t there, dearie.” It’s true.
My sourpuss sister, Genevieve, had no hope of finding love until she finally engaged my services— and now she’s engaged to the equally sourpuss Mark. In time, they’ll birth some sour little kittens. I encouraged* (*borderline forced) my hairdresser Lin-Lin to ask out her deeply shy dog groomer, Margaret. I was their bridesmaid. At that same wedding, I found two sets of shy wallflowers, put them together on the dance floor, and now there are two new engagement rings on fingers.
I don’t mean to brag, but my skills are uncanny.
Despite all my undeniable successes, I never thought to write a book until the red string of fate led me to Ruthie Midona, the person whom I needed to teach me something: my approach needed some flexibility. She shuffled around like an elderly woman until I overhauled her entire way of seeing herself. She was a chronic list maker, and for her it made sense to be led through my program with a series of checklists and journaling prompts, which form the basis of the book you are holding. Love happens at unexpected moments, and we’d agreed Ruthie would not fall in love with the first man she saw.
Now Ruthie’s being smothered with kisses by a man who seemed completely wrong for her, and he’s the first man she laid eyes on. That red string never gets it wrong, and unlikely puzzle pieces always fit together. It gave me a new perspective that has contributed to this book in a fundamental way. Plan, but also go with it. I have to dedicate this book to Ruthie, because without her, I doubt I would have had the inspiration to organize all my various techniques, solutions, and worldviews into a formal document. She loves a procedure manual. Thank you, Ruthie, for being the first participant of the Sasaki Method. I await my call that you are engaged to that rascal Theodore, and I remind you that a lilac bridesmaid’s dress is what we agreed.
I’m sure you’re not yet convinced about why I am qualified to help you break out of your shell and find that special someone, and truthfully, I have no formal qualifications. I’m not a psychologist. I have had every job from A(utomotive Parts Cataloger) to Z(umba Studio Administrator). But trust me, this is my gift. All I ask is that you go with it wholeheartedly. Eight weeks with me will change your life. You will find the book organized into eight parts, as follows:
? TURN-ONS AND DEALBREAKERS
? ME, MYSELF, AND I
? MELANIE’S MAKEOVER MONTAGE
? FIRST DATE MIDPOINT
? COMFORTING YOUR REJECTED INNER CHILD
? WHAT’S COOKING GOOD-LOOKING
? I’M ALL I NEED—BUT YOU CAN JOIN ME IF YOU’RE RESPECTFUL AND SEXY
? GRADUATION DAY
I have the Midas touch, and I want to touch you.
(Okay, maybe I’ll revisit that phrasing in the editing process.)