Reckless Abandon(2)



Capri is a massive rock, shooting out from the Tyrrhenian Sea. Rocky caves around the island can be made out as the water crashes at the base. Up top, a cloud hides the peak of the mountain, making it seem as if heaven is just beyond the fog. Cascading down the slope is fresh green, hugging the landscape like a blanket.

As you get closer to the island, the definition and vibrant colors of homes and hotels peering up from the greenery becomes clearer. Shades of gold, red, and orange reflect off the rooftops. At the foreground, vendors and shops are bustling with activity. Tourists are buying souvenirs or trying to get a glimpse of Mt. Vesuvius, while others are walking to the various restaurants that line the marina.

Stepping off the boat, Leah and I had rolled our suitcases along the stone path of the dock and over to where my map said we could hail a taxi or take a bus to our hotel. Leah being Leah, hell bent on living life to the fullest, decided we should walk to our hotel, taking the narrow stairway paths that cut through the island. She said it would be “exciting” and would help us “stretch our legs.” She had no idea how many hundreds of stairs we would have to climb.

“Buses are for tourists. We are here to enjoy this magnificent island and the only way to do it is on foot!” Leah gives a loud huff at the end of her sentence, as she wraps two hands around the lever of her large suitcase and hoists it up.

“Switch bags with me,” I say. My bag is much smaller and easier to maneuver. I pack light. We’re spending a week in the exotic Mediterranean. How many pieces of clothing could you need?

Apparently for Leah, it’s a lot.

I extend my arm, then quickly pull it back, realizing the one I was offering wouldn’t be of any use.

“No, Emma, your hand.” She stops her progression and looks down at me. “You must be having enough trouble lifting your own. I wasn’t thinking. I shouldn’t—”

“It’s fine.” I cut her off, stretching out my right hand, a constant reminder of the worst year of my life and all the dreams that faded in one awful weekend.

A heart-wrenching breakup with the man I thought I was going to marry?

Check.

The devastating loss of a family member that left my soul aching so hard I found it hard to breathe?

Check. Check.

An accident that crushed my desires and everything I’d worked my entire life for, leaving me virtually numb?

Triple check.

Yes, it has been the worst year of my life and we’re only halfway through it. I’ve been so anesthetized and empty that my family pushed their own grieving aside to make sure I’m okay. All they want to do is talk, when it’s the last thing I need. That, and have them worry about me. They worry too much.

I shake off the thought and brush away Leah’s concerns. “It’s fine. I’m using my left hand. Keep going. This should be the last set of stairs and then our hotel is on the left.”

With a nod, Leah continues up, me following, until we reach a road. Sure enough, our hotel is just to the left. I have never been more excited to see a hotel in my life.

I love vacations, don’t get me wrong. But for the amount of travel and manual labor it just took to get us here, this better be the best vacation of my life. At least I hope it is. Leah gave up a lot for us to experience this together.

We enter the sliding glass doors of the Villa Marina Capri and a lovely receptionist who speaks perfect English greets us. She takes our passports to make copies, as per Italian custom, and when she returns them she escorts us to an outdoor waiting area while our room is readied.

I’m a bit unsure about leaving my bag. Ever since my luggage was stolen on a college trip to Cancún, I refuse to let other people handle my belongings. After Leah assures me this five-star resort is a far cry from that rum-soaked Mexican hotel, I concede, but only after making sure my purse, along with my money and valuables, is with me.

Leah just laughs at my one OCD trait and heads outside with me.

“Oh my God.” The words escape my mouth.

“Oh my God is right.” Leah repeats, sliding her sunglasses up her perfect button nose.

The two of us stand in awe, gawking over the incredible sight before us. If I thought the view coming into port was phenomenal, I was mistaken. This is the most incredible view I have ever seen in my life.

Standing about a third up the mountain, the island below us, and the sea beyond it, is the true answer of why God created the earth. So we can marvel at its beauty.

The afternoon sun is shining bright. The sky is a perfect shade of blue with a few stray clouds. The whiteness of them only illuminates the color of the sky. The rooftops below are a gorgeous copper color and the sea is all but breathtaking.

With a slight breeze in the air, Leah’s hair blows away from her cheek. Looking over at her, I see a look of melancholy on her face. A look so un-Leah, it makes my stomach drop.

“I knew this was a bad idea. I shouldn’t be here. Adam . . .” The words choke in my throat.

“Adam is the most amazing man in the world.” She finishes my sentence for me. It’s not what I was going to say, but she’s right. Leah’s fiancé, Adam Reingold, is by far the most caring, understanding, and perfect man in the world. He is the kind of guy you want your sister to marry. It’s exactly why I feel awful being the one standing here with her and not him.

Leah gives me this knowing look that she’s been giving me a lot lately, followed by a hug. “Stop it. We’re here and this is happening. This week is about you and me. We are going to have the most spectacular vacation of our lives and I don’t want you feeling bad for one second. You hear me?” She holds me tighter and I return her embrace.

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