Real Fake Love (Copper Valley Fireballs #2)(25)

I grab Henri’s free hand and growl at the pitcher.

“Meatballs or echidnas?” Francisco asks.

Henri’s brown eyebrows furrow. “For eating?”

All three of us stare dumbly at her, and she cracks up. “Wow, the looks on your faces. Guys. I know about the mascot contest. And I—”

Brooks’s door swings open, and Mackenzie pokes her head out. She’s holding Coco Puff, their rapidly-growing cavapoo puppy that Brooks got during spring training, and while Coco Puff barks and his collar shouts out an enthusiastic You’re a winner to me!, Brooks’s blonde fiancée eyeballs the hot mess that’s pretending to be my girlfriend.

And her cat.

She squints.

Henri beams. “Hi! You must be Mackenzie. Can I have a Fiery Forever button? The echidna looks super cool, and I can’t stop laughing at Glow’s campaign around his big fire butt, but let’s be real here. A team like the Fireballs deserves a dragon mascot.”

“I hate that firefly’s ass,” I mutter, but no one pays attention to me, because Henri is clearly the center of attention.

And for good reason.

Who the hell can smile that bright like she’s not wearing weird pajamas while meeting her fake boyfriend’s real friends for the first time?

I think my nuts are sweating.

This isn’t good. This isn’t good at all.

Mackenzie stays poker-faced, which is impressive. This is the same woman who’d go catatonic in the presence of Fireballs players six months ago, and look at her now, playing the tough chick with my fake girlfriend. “Are you kissing up to me?”

“I could if you want me to, but really, I do like the dragon best.” She shifts her cat and lowers her voice. “Even though I saw Luca’s poster of the duck in his closet. We’re a house divided.”

Mackenzie rounds on me with a gasp, and Henri giggles, which is better than the snorting.

“She’s lying,” I say quickly.

“Teasing,” Henri corrects. “Sweetie, we need to work on your trust issues, but that’s okay. We’ll get there.”

And now I look like I’m completely and totally whipped by a psycho wearing a sexy male vampire on her pajamas.

Maybe this is karma for trying to dodge The Eye.

“Is that Confucius?” Mackenzie nods to Henri’s shirt.

My fake girlfriend gets so excited her towel starts to tilt. “Yes! Ohmygosh, you know Confucius?”

Brooks sticks his head out of the apartment too, followed closely by Cooper, whose grin is half you want to sleep with me until he gets a load of the leaning tower of towel. “Man who go through turnstile… Whoa.” He shakes his head. “Rossi, dude, you’ve gotta get your girlfriend the official pajamas.”

“No, no.” Mackenzie beckons us into the apartment. “She can wear Confucius anytime. He’s hot.”

Henri blushes while we all troop inside. “I can’t believe you know Confucius!”

“He’s okay for a vampire,” Brooks grumbles.

“Ohmygosh, you’ve read Bite of the Wild?”

“Brooks’s brother-in-law runs this romance book club in New York. We join in on video chat whenever we can. Do you think there’ll be a book five? I can’t believe that cliffhanger in book four, but it’s been almost two years, and—”

Henri grimaces. “Yeah. That was after Kyle. He took a while to recover from, but I think I’m about ready to tackle For Whom the Vamp Bites.”

“No, no, it’s not out yet. Knox heard Nora Dawn was having some personal issues, but she’s putting out How to Train Your Vampire soon, which is good, because it’s been a while since she had a new book, even if it is a new series. And…who’s Kyle? I don’t remember a Kyle.”

Henri elbows me, and I realize I’m supposed to say something.

Like I’m supposed to know anything about her vampire novels.

Shit.

I’m going to have to read them.

Dammit.

She elbows me again, and my brain cells finally click together. “Henri’s Nora Dawn,” I announce.

She beams, which means I got it right.

Thank fuck.

But then she elbows me a third time.

Shit. Dammit. I have to do something boyfriend-ish.

Right.

Sell it. If I can’t sell it to these bozos, how am I going to sell it to Nonna?

I wrap an arm around her, and in the process I accidentally tip the towel tower.

It tilts to the right.

Her head goes with it.

I try to grab it and accidentally punch it instead, which makes her jerk sideways into Mackenzie’s wall of bobbleheads.

They all start clacking together—the ones not squished by the towel—and it startles her practically-dead cat, which yowls and leaps.

Right into Francisco’s jewels.

Mackenzie’s gasping. Like, she gasps, then we move, and she gasps again as we assault more of her bobbleheads.

Dogzilla the cat has suddenly realized it’s in clothing, and it doesn’t like it, and it’s chasing its tail while Coco Puff barks and tries to escape Mackenzie’s arms.

Every time Coco Puff barks, his collar yells.

I love you!

You’re the best!

Believe it and you can achieve it!