Rapid Falls(23)

Shafts of white light pierced the haze around me. My hands and legs felt leaden. I couldn’t escape; I was flailing. The water was colder than I had imagined during those nights in my sleepless bed, colder than I remembered. I could hear the shouts of people on the raft, but the layers of water that engulfed me distorted them so I couldn’t tell what direction the surface was. The current pulled me in deeper and my heartbeat stabbed my chest. It was happening again, but this time I was not in control. My hands tore at the water as if I could climb away from drowning. I was about to die.

Then a hand cut through the water. I felt the back of my life jacket lift suddenly, the strap between my legs digging in uncomfortably. In seconds I was back in the boat. I looked up at Rick as he gently released the handle at the back of my jacket. His other arm still held an oar, steering the boat through the heavy rapids. As I gasped and coughed, I felt the waves under the boat stop tossing. Once again the water was calm below us.

“Are you okay? I didn’t realize how low the water had gotten back there. That spot was much calmer last week.” Rick sounded worried. I wondered if a mistake like that could cost him his job. He had almost killed me.

I still couldn’t speak, so I nodded instead. My eyes felt like they were open too wide, and the warm sun was as bright as a harsh light upon waking. I blinked hard. Rick looked at me closely and his lips parted again to speak when Gwen, the intern with the desk beside mine, broke in. I turned toward her and was startled to see that she was also dripping.

“That was crazy, right?” Her voice was loud with unrestrained joy, her eyes shining with excitement. I was confused by her lack of terror.

“You went in the water too?” I said, finding my voice.

“Yeah! Rick pulled me out right before you. He said it happens all the time on this kind of trip. What a rush!” She leaned back and whooped. Everyone else joined in. I realized that no one else thought I had been in danger. I hadn’t even been the first to be rescued.

“You’re lucky. I’m sweating like crazy. Wouldn’t mind a little dunk myself.” Mayor Duncan leaned toward us with a laugh. “Need a hand getting back to your seat?”

I realized I was still in the middle of the raft. I shook my head and slid over to my side. “No, I’m great. What a fun trip!”

I tried to smile to make sure no one could tell how scared I really was. Nobody thought that anything had gone wrong. I gripped my oar again, turning to stare at the glassy surface of the river. I hadn’t nearly died. I had been fine all along, even if I couldn’t convince myself of it yet.

“You were laddering.” Rick’s voice was low. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to you first.”

“What?” My lungs felt raw.

“Even the best swimmers do it. People try to climb out of the water, like they are going up a ladder. It’s a natural response to shock. We use everything we have to get out. It’s so cold, especially when you don’t expect it. It must have triggered an instinctual response. I bet you’ve never felt anything like that before.”

I felt his hand on my arm, and I turned back to look into his eyes. They were so kind.

“No, nothing,” I lied.

“It’s okay to be scared of this river. We need to respect the water. I shouldn’t have been so careless. I’m sorry,” he said.

“It’s okay.” I didn’t want Rick to feel responsible for me, even as I hoped my reassurances wouldn’t make him move his hand off my arm. I liked the feeling of him touching me.

“Maybe I can make it up to you?” A light danced in his eyes, flickering through the worry.

“Maybe.” I grinned.

“I get off at five. Can I buy you a drink?”

I felt another rush of shame. He thought I was as old as he was.

“I’m only nineteen.”

He laughed as if that was no big deal. “How about a picnic dinner, then? I turned twenty-one a month ago. I can buy us a bottle of wine.”

“Sounds great.” We both laughed like I had told a joke. I turned back to the front of the raft and began rowing slowly. I looked around quickly to see if anyone had noticed our exchange. Everyone was chatting away except the mayor.

He looked at me and winked. “I’m glad you could come today, Cara.”

“Me too.” I said the words before I realized they were true. I felt purely happy for the first time since Jesse had died. Rick gave me that. It was why I married him.



When we pull into the underground parking lot of the resort, I sigh happily. I remember the hot tubs, cedar saunas, and diving pools from our first visit, when we spent hours dipping in and out of the water while servers brought drinks and food at our request.

“When was the last time we got a room alone?” he asks as he unlocks the door of our room. As soon as it closes behind us, he pulls me in for a kiss. He runs his hands down my body and makes a low groan. I press myself against him, peeling off his shirt as he pushes me against the wall. It doesn’t take long; we haven’t had sex in weeks, and he is ready for me even before I touch him. Afterward his breath is hot and fast on my neck.

“God, Cara. I’ve missed you.”

“Me too. Please, let’s not wait so long next time.”

“Deal.” He pulls away to face me and his eyes are full of love. “This was the best idea I’ve ever had.”