Queenie(42)
She pretended to be watching Fresh Prince, but actually tweeted: “Queenie is SO boring that spending time with her feels like this,” accompanied by a picture of a skeleton, from the official Daily Read Twitter account, which was the final straw. I took the laptop away and password-protected it when she was in the bathroom.
In an attempt to get her to stay still and not touch anything or critique me any further, I cooked her a pizza. As predicted, she finished it all. When it got to nine, I called Maggie, but her phone was off. I tried again at nine-thirty, still nothing. I gave Diana one of my favorite books to read, promising her that she’d love it, then arguing about why Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging was worth reading despite the confusing title. She started reading it while I stared at her, smiling encouragingly; satisfied when she started laughing, I checked my work e-mail.
On Tuesday, 11th December, Noman, Ted <[email protected]> wrote at 21:40:
I think you need to let yourself be happy. You’re waiting for some guy who should respect you enough to at least contact you. But look, I’m here telling you how I feel.
On Tuesday, 11th December, Jenkins, Queenie <[email protected]> wrote at 21:42:
Ted. I’m not quite sure what your motives are here. I’ve said before, we don’t really know each other. And as for “some guy,” my boyfriend will get in touch soon. Can you not see how this in itself is more drama than either of us needs?
On Tuesday, 11th December, Noman, Ted <[email protected]> wrote at 21:43:
I wouldn’t keep you waiting.
I looked over at Diana, and she’d fallen asleep with the book on her face. I should have realized from the silence. I tried Maggie one more time, but when she didn’t answer, I moved Diana so that she was under the quilt. This woke her, because when I turned the light off and got in next to her, she turned to me.
“Queenie. I need a headscarf,” she whispered. “I won’t be able to sleep properly without one.”
“Oh. Sorry for waking you up,” I said, reaching into my bedside table for my spare headscarf. “Here you go.”
I heard her tie it in the dark, then she was silent. I closed my eyes.
“What happened to your boyfriend?” Diana’s words cut through the darkness. I thought that if I stayed quiet, she’d think I’d fallen asleep. “The white boy,” she pressed on. “The one who wasn’t, like, handsome, but kinda cute in, like, a white bae kind of way.”
“Tom?” I yielded.
“Yeah. Where’s he gone?”
“We’re on a break,” I said firmly.
“So you’ve broken up?”
“Nope. A break, like, some time out,” I corrected her. “It’s what adults do.”
“Well, have some you time, I guess. Anyway, it’s like my mum says. Men will just drain you.” I was worried she’d recite Maggie’s speech from the hospital. “You need to be ready before you let them come into your life. Maybe you weren’t ready.”
Was she old enough to be talking like this?
Queenie
Tom, this is shit. I miss you. It’s been almost three months. Have you had enough time yet?
* * *
He replied the next afternoon.
Tom
I’m sorry
After work, I met Ted in the park.
chapter
TEN
On Thursday, 13th December, Noman, Ted <[email protected]> wrote at 17:21:
My mind is racing. x
On Thursday, 13th December, Jenkins, Queenie <[email protected]> wrote at 17:32:
Why? Calm down.
On Thursday, 13th December, Noman, Ted <[email protected]> wrote at 17:36:
I’m being paranoid about everything. x
On Thursday, 13th December, Jenkins, Queenie <[email protected]> wrote at 17:40:
Like what? Nobody saw us.
On Thursday, 13th December, Noman, Ted <[email protected]> wrote at 17:41:
What if they saw my hands up your skirt?? What if I’m put on some sort of register?
On Thursday, 13th December, Noman, Ted <[email protected]> wrote at 17:43:
Sorry, I’m just being stupid. I just can’t believe it happened, after everything. x
On Thursday, 13th December, Jenkins, Queenie <[email protected]> wrote at 17:50:
Don’t worry about it. We couldn’t have been more covert.
He was annoying me now. I had loads of stuff to finish.
On Thursday, 13th December, Noman, Ted <[email protected]> wrote at 17:55:
How are you feeling? x
On Thursday, 13th December, Jenkins, Queenie <[email protected]> wrote at 18:03:
Busy. Guilty.
Various stranger sex, fine. Catching feelings, not fine.
On the way back from work, I battled my way through Oxford Street and bought a present for Tom. Partly out of guilt, but mainly out of ritual. There were certain things I wouldn’t let slide, break or not. I’m trying to gear myself up to spending the “happy holidays” without him and his family for the first time in three years. At least I don’t have to choose his presents for his parents anymore. Or put up with casual family racism.