Prisoner of Night (The Black Dagger Brotherhood #16.5)(60)

“What did you tell Ahmare?”

“Nothing. She’s asleep.”

“You’re a coward then.”

“I didn’t ahvenge my mahmen, after all. And my father is likely dead somewhere under that mountain. I have no future—”

“Oh, cut the shit. Of course you have a future. It’s every time you look at that female. And she feels the same for you. God knows I’m no expert in romance, but come on. Even I see it.”

“Are you going to stop me? Is that why you’re blocking the door?”

There was a long silence. Then Nexi got out of his way, standing off to the side. “What do you want me to tell her?”

“I’ll be back. I’m just going for a walk to clear my head.”

“You sure about that?”

No. “Yes.”

“Fair enough. I’ll tell her you went for a walk. But FYI, I saw what losing you did to her once. I’d appreciate you not putting me or a decent female like that back in that place. It’s a shitty thing to do, and with both your parents dead now, it’s about damn time you start leading your own life. You don’t owe anybody anything—except that female you’re walking out on.”

As Nexi went past him to go back down to the basement, she gave him a quick, hard hug. “You don’t deserve all the pain you’ve had. A lot of it wasn’t anything to do with you and it is certainly nothing to fault yourself for. But this? Leaving now? You’re being your own enemy, creating your own prison, and after all the time you’ve been in dungeons created by other people, haven’t you had enough of that shit?”

Left alone, Duran stayed where he was, on the precipice . . . for a while. Then he unlocked the door and stepped out onto the stoop. The air was cool and cleaner at this altitude, the scent of the pines that grew all around the house thick in the night.

His feet started moving, his boots making no sound.

Because he didn’t want anyone to hear his departure.

Least of all his Ahmare.





38




AHMARE BOLTED UPRIGHT IN bed, heart hammering in her chest, breath sawing down her throat. Putting her hand up to her sternum, she looked around.

Duran was gone.

And not in-the-bathroom gone.

As in all-weapons-that-had-been-on-the-bureau gone.

Jumping from the bed, she nearly bolted naked out of their room, but managed at the last moment to pull on a robe that hung on the back of the door.

The house was quiet. The shutters still down. No one—

The scent of bacon drifted into her nose and she exhaled in relief. Telling herself not to be so paranoid, she forced herself to walk like a normal, sane person down to the kitchen . . . where she found Nexi facing the stove, cooking up some strips of heaven in a pan.

Ahmare tried not to rush to conclusions when Duran was nowhere to be found in the galley.

“I guess I slept in,” she said in what she hoped was a calm, conversational tone.

In her head, she was screaming, WHERE IS HE!

“Mattress okay for you then?” the Shadow murmured.

“Oh, yes. Thank you.”

When Nexi didn’t turn around, when she just poked at the sizzling maple-smoked bacon in the pan with a fork, the pain in Ahmare’s chest came back.

“When did he leave?” she asked baldly.

“Fifteen minutes ago. Twenty at the most.”

Ahmare stumbled over and took a stool. “He didn’t wake me.”

“I told him not to go.” The Shadow finally pivoted around, crossing her arms, that fork sticking out of her fist. “I told him he was an asshole. Look, he’s been through a lot. You can’t imagine what it was like in the colony with his father. What happened there. Even if he told you some of it, he didn’t tell you everything, and then there was Chalen. It’s too much to hold in one male’s head.” Nexi touched her temple. “Too much to hold in anyone’s head. He loves you. He just needs time. He doesn’t know who he is right now. He’ll be back, though.”

“How can you be sure?”

“He’s bonded with you,” the Shadow said wryly. “Or do you think that’s cologne he’s sprayed himself with?”

Ahmare thought about the compression of hours. And her sense that she had known these people her entire life when in fact that was only true about her brother downstairs.

“How is Ahlan?” she asked roughly.

“Great. I mean—he’s recovering. He’s asleep. I mean, I checked on him—”

“It’s okay.” Ahmare tried to smile through the agony in her heart. “I think I know where it’s going between the two of you. My brother can be a lot to deal with, but something tells me you can handle him.”

The Shadow smiled a little and turned back to the bacon, flipping the strips over one by one. “You better believe I can.”

Ahmare got off the stool, pushing it back under the counter. Then she cleared her throat and started to make some excuse about returning to her bedroom— “He’s going to be back.” Nexi looked over her shoulder. “But he has unfinished business, business that will never be finished. There’s a reason why people ahvenge their dead. It’s a brutal way of dealing with grief, but the shit works.”