People Like Us(77)
I was so determined.
And then his phone rang, and he pulled away.
I grabbed it from him, breathless. “What the fuck?” It was an untraceable campus number. All Bates landline numbers are untraceable for security reasons.
He reached for it. “Just let me answer.”
I sat up. “Why?”
“Because I was supposed to meet someone. You know I didn’t just randomly wander here looking for you. I’ll blow them off; just let me answer the phone.”
I pulled the Gatsby dress off the floor, feeling like an idiot. “While you’re with me?”
His eyes turned pleading. “It wasn’t like a date. She was freaked out and she wanted me to stop by and check on her.”
“Stunningly original.” The phone stopped ringing.
Spencer threw himself back against the seat. “Nothing’s ever good enough.”
I punched the side of the car. “You do not pick up the phone in the middle of a hookup. Ever.”
The phone started ringing again. It was the same scrambled campus number. I answered.
“Spencer? Please hurry. I’m locked out of—”
“Fuck off.” I hung up.
Spencer grabbed his phone, threw on his clothes, and stormed out of the car. I grabbed for the bottle of prosecco and realized that I must have left it outside when we moved things into the car. But when I went back to the path to look for it, I couldn’t find it.
I leaned against a tree and sighed. My buzz was totally gone and the night was ruined. There was no way I was going to tell any of my friends I went crawling back to Spencer to be humiliated after the night started with them hailing me as a campus hero, so I had to put on a bright, shiny, everything-is-awesome face and meet them on the green like nothing had ever happened. I decided to take the long way through the village to cool down, and I began to walk away from the lake toward the darkened shops.
“Katie.”
I turned back toward Spencer.
“Can I fix this?”
“I said everything I have to say to you.”
“I can’t undo what I did. I can’t make her disappear.”
“I can make myself disappear.”
As I walked away, I heard the sound of shattering glass somewhere behind me.
* * *
? ? ?
I WATCH SPENCER carefully across the table. “Where did you go after I left you that night?”
“Home.” He doesn’t break eye contact.
I decide to put all the cards on the table. “I think my bottle was the murder weapon.”
“It crossed my mind.”
“That I killed Jessica?”
“You were pretty adamant that I get rid of her.”
It suddenly hits me that this whole time everything I’ve been trying not to think about because it makes him look guilty has been weighing on him, too. Except to him, I’m the one who looks like the murderer. I was the one who kept insisting that she had to go. “I didn’t know who she was yet, Spencer. I heard you say the name Jess, but that could have been over a dozen people, and I’d never heard of Jessica Lane.”
“What about that prank?”
“It was anonymous,” I say desperately. The tables just turned on me dizzyingly quickly.
“And Maddy? You just happened to be there to find her? You happened to be there to find both of them?”
I feel my eyes welling up. “Spencer, you think I did this? I thought you would be behind me.”
“No, you thought I killed them.” His eyes harden.
“I didn’t think it. I just don’t know what to think. It’s you or me.”
“Just because that’s all the police have come up with doesn’t mean that’s all there is. Are you sure Greg is out?”
I gnaw on the lip of my cup until it begins to crumble in my mouth. “He says he is.” Spencer rolls his eyes. “I trust him. He has no link to Maddy, no easy access to campus. I’ve ruled him out.”
“And how do I apply for that status?”
“How about one more game of I Never?”
“It could be arranged.”
I kick my suitcase at him. “I’m staying at your place tonight. Too many enemies on campus.”
“Does that mean I’m officially cleared?”
“It means all things considered, I think I’m safer with one potential murderer than a campus full of them.”
“I’ll take it.”
27
I feel like a fugitive revisiting the scene of the crime as I sit on Spencer’s bed in my pajamas. I haven’t been here since the night he walked in on me and Brie. So much has happened since then. This used to be such a safe and familiar place. I lie down and press my face into the pillow and inhale deeply. It smells like the apple-scented hair product he pretends not to use. I miss that smell. Then I notice another smell, something like patchouli. I wonder if he and Jessica had sex in his bed, and I sit up abruptly. Just then there’s a knock at the door.
“Yes?” I always use my super-polite voice at Spencer’s house. I want his mother to love me. I don’t know why. She’s just this adorable woman and you can tell she has a tough time of it. I want her to think I’m perfect. I guess it doesn’t matter anymore. I hope his next girlfriend kisses her ass accordingly.