Only Killers and Thieves(39)

“Have you always lived here, Tommy? Around here, I mean?”

“Yeah,” he said, shrugging.

“You’re lucky. I mean, I know this is a terrible time for you, but at least you’re where you’re supposed to be. I’ve gone from snow in winter to seasons of dust and heat; city trams to no roads at all. You have to be born to it, I think. I don’t know how you all stand it here, but somehow you do.”

“You don’t like it, then?”

“No, I don’t.” She leaned close and lowered her voice to a whisper. “But don’t tell John I said that. He thinks this place is paradise.”

“So why’d you come? Why not leave?”

She inclined her head ruefully. “You mean it, don’t you—you really are that naive. It’s adorable, actually. But you must have wondered about us, or your parents must have talked? Everyone in the district knows. Besides, it’s obvious—I’m closer to you in age than I am to John.”

“Daddy didn’t like us talking about Mr. Sullivan at home.”

“Well, that’s very polite of him. And I’ve not been here so long, I suppose: we only married last year, the same day I turned eighteen. John wants a son, you see, is desperate for one, in fact, and his first wife, Jacqueline, well, she wasn’t up to the job. His freemartin, he calls her—can you imagine! So he moved her on quietly and came down to Melbourne looking for a new wife . . . and, lo and behold, found me!”

She spread her arms when she said this. Her neck had reddened, her cheeks too, and her voice had become harsh. Tommy went to speak but she waved her hand to silence him.

“Oh, don’t worry, there’s nothing to be done, it’s just the way of the world. Think yourself lucky you’re a man, that’s all I can say. John bought me off my father no different than a cow. I’m his prize breeder now, Tommy, that’s what I am. A breeder meant to give him a son.”

She drained her drink and went to the table, laughing as she poured. When she turned around again she was damp-eyed and her lips ticked from grin to grimace and back again.

“And so,” she said shakily, sipping, “here I am, waiting to breed, stuck where I don’t belong. Which is bad enough but now . . . now there’s a war coming, these blacks killing families right here in their homes.” She crossed herself. “In Melbourne they wouldn’t have dared—I don’t mean to sound callous, talking like this when you’ve suffered so much, but this problem with the natives: it’s all of ours, Tommy, John’s right about that. If this is what they’re capable of, none of us is truly safe.”

She pulled a handkerchief from her sleeve and dabbed carefully at her eyes. Tommy crunched the lolly and ground it between his teeth, glancing at the door and the chance to leave.

“I know this must seem overwhelming, but John’ll take care of you, and your brother and sister. He’s not such a bad man. Do you go to church, Tommy?”

“Not really. Ma did sometimes.”

“No, John doesn’t either. He’s quite scornful about it, actually. But he has his principles, which is something. He’ll see that you’re alright.”

“Him and Daddy didn’t exactly get along.”

“Well, John doesn’t have what you’d call friends. But you’re our neighbors, and didn’t your father used to work here, I believe?”

“Once. A long time ago.”

“Still . . .”

“They didn’t see things the same. About the blacks, Noone.”

She shook her head. “Which only makes this all the more tragic.”

There was a silence. Tommy took a breath and said, “What he was saying at dinner, though, about going out after Joseph and them Kurrong . . . maybe if you spoke to him he might change his mind about that, see if we couldn’t—”

Tommy stalled. Her eyes had hardened and her lips were drawn tight.

“I think perhaps you misunderstand me, Tommy. I might not approve of how John speaks to the houseboy, but he’s my husband, I stand at his side. These natives, from what I’ve seen, they’ve been given every opportunity and still they refuse to change. Work, education, we’ve tried to civilize them but the savagery is in their blood. I’ve even heard they eat their own young, for heaven’s sake. And yet they’re all around us, we have them in our house! There’s knives in the kitchen, firearms . . . most of them are as familiar with a rifle as they are with a spear. Honestly, it’s terrifying. In fact, I wish there were a hundred Mr. Noones out there, Tommy, making sure that we’re safe.” She shook her head determinedly. “No, justice must be done, then perhaps the wretches might think twice about attacking a white family again. Surely you of all people cannot disagree?”

“No,” Tommy mumbled.

“Well, good. I’m glad to hear it.” She stepped a pace closer and delicately lifted his chin with her fingertip. “Look at you, you’re exhausted, poor thing. It’s no wonder you’re not thinking straight. Why not go up to bed, get a good night’s rest?”

“Alright.”

“God bless you, then.”

He nodded faintly, backtracked, hurried across the room, then paused in the doorway and turned.

“Thanks for the lolly. It was really good.”