One More Time(29)

That’s when I realized I had to let her go.

I told my friends I didn’t have time to keep chasing her and stay focused on my acting. The truth was I believed she didn’t have time for our relationship and her career. She’d been giving up so much for me, and if I explained the truth about the video to her, she’d go right back to sacrificing again.

So she ran, but I let her go.

I let her go, and I don’t regret my reasons, but I regret losing her.

And I regret that she thinks that I cheated on her, that I would ever hurt her like that. I want to punch the smarmy host right in the TV screen about now. And then find those asshole pranksters that set me up for the Kiss Cam charade and punch them. And then maybe even chew out Natalia for being so gullible.

But I know I should be kicking myself in the ass, too. I’m not only responsible for what happened that day, but I’m also responsible for what happened after. For losing her. For losing us.

I just kept thinking I’d find an opportunity to make it right, but I never did.

And the worst part is that it was all for nothing. Even stepping away, her career hasn’t blossomed the way it should have. The way I hoped it would. So, when Three Spot Films took me up on my suggestion to co-produce a Janner reunion film, I knew they agreed because of the money that could be made from the publicity. But I put together this opportunity because it was time for the world to see the star Jenna was meant to be. And because I was tired of waiting for the universe to offer me a second chance. This time, I made my own chance, and I’m determined not to screw it up.

I don’t have any scenes on the shooting schedule for today, but I decide to head to set anyway. When you’re in production mode and away from home, there isn’t much else to do. I can’t risk heading to the beach; I might get a sunburn and the make-up department would rake me over the coals. I’d rather not hang around town because paparazzi will probably swarm with questions about filming. And there’s also the fact that Jenna is on set…shooting a scene where she works out with her character’s best friend…wearing what I can only imagine are skin tight spandex pants and a sports bra.

I find a spot to successfully hide out and watch while Jenna and Kit shoot the scene. I’m pretty sure the camera guy hiding me knows exactly what’s up, but I don’t give a shit. He has an even better view of Jenna in action.

I was right—the wardrobe is skintight black spandex pants and a hot yellow sports bra. Jenna looks fucking amazing. And she’s doing an amazing job. I can’t take my eyes off her in this scene. She’s a natural, like I always told her she would be. Watching her I’m filled with this weird sense of pride – like that’s my Jenna getting it done out there. It feels good to have that connection to her again. It feels good to be around her every day again.

Why the fuck did I wait so long to try to make things right?

That decision makes zero sense as I stand here now, eyes fixed on the gorgeous, perfect girlfriend I let get away all those years ago. I don’t want to lose her again. And I definitely don’t want to lose the chance to feel myself deep inside her over and over and over.

Maybe that’s where I’ll start, and maybe I can appeal to the new actor in her. I can convince her that if we keep having sex it will be good for character chemistry.

Is that conniving?

A little.

But it’s a necessary means to a beautiful end. At least that’s what I’m telling myself as I prepare to chat with Jenna after her scene. I’ll casually stroll up to her in the crafty tent and tell her I just came to set to pick up something from my trailer. Then I’ll just as casually propose this little plan.

To my surprise it’s Jenna who finds me near the taco truck fifteen minutes later. She walks right up. There’s a determined glare in her eyes, which can only mean one thing—It’s “never again” spiel time.

But I’m prepared to cut her off and change the game. I’ve got my own spiel.

“Hey,” Jenna says with a smile that totally throws me off. “I didn’t expect to see you on set. I’m glad you came. Did you see my scenes? I think it went well.”

“Uh…” She’s so easygoing. So laid-back that I nearly forget my lines. “Yeah. I did. I came to grab something and I caught the last few takes.”

“Oh good.” She brushes her hair behind her ear. And did she just take a step closer? “I was actually going to head back to your hotel room later if you weren’t on set.”

“Yeah?” My voice sounds too high. And my mind goes blank.

“I want to talk to you about something.”

Here we go…Shit. I have to pull myself together. “Right. Listen, Jenna,” I say before she can dive into whatever she means to say. “I know that you’re nervous about us continuing to…you know, but what if we think about it differently?”

“Oh. I’m not nervous. I’m fine with it. More than fine, in fact. I just wanted to set some sex ground rules.”

I’m so fucking shocked that I don’t reply.

I just stand there with what I assume is my mouth open while Jenna says something about only having sex during the shoot and keeping all this from the press and being super secretive.

And then she drops the line that truly blows me away: “It’s good for character development,” she says, “Like method acting, right?”