One Baby Daddy (Dating by Numbers #3)(82)

Sitting on a bench, she curls her legs close to her body and wraps her long cardigan around her knees, bringing them close to her chest.

Not even bothering with the flowers anymore, I set them in front of her and take a seat, one of my arms spanning across the length of the bench, the other dragging my hand over my face. “What the fuck, Adalyn? You didn’t tell me douche nugget was moving out here.”

“I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“Easy.” I give her my attention. “You pick up the damn phone when I call you and you tell me.”

“You already hate him, I didn’t—”

“You’re damn right I hate him. I mean . . . fuck,” I press my fingers into my brow, squeezing my eyes shut, “Are you seeing him?”

“Like as in dating?”

“Yeah, are you two dating?”

Fiddling with her cardigan, she doesn’t answer me right away, making my heart stammer in my chest and my skin prickle with pure hatred.

“No,” she finally answers.

“Why did it take you so long to answer?”

Turning her head toward the fountain in the middle of the courtyard, she says, “This is none of your business, Hayden. I moved out here for you. If I bring someone with me, that’s my choice, not yours.”

“This is my business when that douche is sharing an apartment with my girl.” The word slips past my lips before I stop it. Adalyn tilts her head in my direction, a slight shake to it.

“I’m not your girl.”

Well I’m fucking aware of that now.

“But you’re his?” She doesn’t answer, sending me into a heated frenzy. “So basically you’re going to give that shithead a second chance when he treated you with nothing but disrespect after he slept with you, but you’re not looking at me twice when I had no choice in our breaking up, when I wanted nothing more than to try to continue seeing you.” I stand now, pacing back and forth, my mind whirling. “Fuck, Adalyn, do you realize what this is doing to me? That kind of pain you’re putting me through? Why him? Why not me?”

“Because . . .” Her lips quiver, her inability to look me in the eye driving me insane. “You make me hurt too much.”

Halting my pacing, I drop my hand from the back of my neck. “What?”

“He’s easy, Hayden. He’s mindless. He doesn’t make me ache like you do. I’ve had a bad enough pregnancy, I don’t want to make it any harder on myself.”

“So you’re going to fuck a guy I hate with every bone in my body and play house with him, with my baby, because he’s easy? Are you hearing what you’re saying?”

“We’re not fucking as you so eloquently stated.”

“Does he kiss you?” I hold my breath, waiting for her answer. I want those lips for me and me alone. Luscious and plump, so addicting I could spend hours pressing my mouth against hers. I don’t think I can stand knowing Logan gets that privilege, gets to taste her, touch her . . .

“We’re friends, Hayden.”

“But he wants more.” It’s not a question; it’s a statement. I’m not an idiot, I know when a guy is infatuated, when he’s fucking lost over a girl because that dumb-as-shit look Logan gives Adalyn is the same damn look I have on my face.

“I have a feeling he does.” She presses her chin on her knees, staring down at the bench.

Scratching the heavy scruff on my jaw, I decide to try to calm myself, tamping down my anger because that’s not going to get me anywhere. Instead, I go for a more gentle approach. Sitting down next to her, I rub my thumb over her cheek, drawing her attention.

“Adalyn, do you hear what you’re saying? You are aware he has feelings for you. Why would you do this to him? Aren’t you playing him? Using him?”

“No, I’m not. He’s only a—”

“Not in his eyes. And I don’t believe that you, someone so kindhearted, so giving and selfless normally, would do that.”

She looks away, and I can see she’s trying to deny what I’m saying is true. If she wasn’t confused, weakened by the weeks of being sick, I’d run now, because I don’t want someone so thoughtless handling my heart either. I know it’s not the real her, though. Unless I have read her very badly, but I no longer think so. But I don’t want her focusing on him. I want her heart as it is completely interwoven with mine.

"What can I do to make this work between us?"

She searches my eyes, her brown to my brown. “Hayden,” she sighs, “It was a fling, let’s keep it—”

“Don’t you fucking lie to me about what we had. Respect me enough to never use that word again. It’s an insult, one I don’t deserve.”

Giving in, she says, “I’m sorry, but it still doesn’t change anything. I don’t think I’m cut out for the world you live in, Hayden.”

“How do you know? You haven’t been a part of my world for long enough, you haven’t given me a full chance to show how you and the baby can fit perfectly into it.”

She shakes her head. “You’re caught up in the pregnancy. If it weren’t for the baby, we would still be three thousand miles apart.”

“Not in my fucking heart.” Taking her hand, I press it against my chest, letting her feel how wildly it beats for her. “You have been buried inside here since the day I first met you. Why do you think I traveled around Binghamton going from hospital to hospital looking for you? Because I knew leaving Racer’s house without your number was one of the biggest mistakes of my life, second to letting you walk out of the cottage the day I was traded. This isn’t a fling for me, this isn’t because of us having a baby together, and this isn’t because you live out here now. This feeling I have for you, this powerful, all-consuming feeling, it’s fucking real and I’ll be damned if I don’t try to earn your heart every day for the rest of my life.”