Moonlight Over Manhattan(73)

She realized that far from not talking, she’d done nothing but talk and she clamped her mouth shut, embarrassed.

He gave her a searching look. “What’s wrong?”

What was wrong was that she didn’t want this date to be pretend. She wanted it to be real. She wanted to be sitting across from him, hearing about his day and talking while she told him about hers.

And then she wanted to go home with him, rip all his clothes off, and do things Harriet Knight had never done in her life before.

She thought about the night she’d undressed him, the glimpse of his hard strong body. She couldn’t stop thinking about it.

“Harriet?”

“Sorry? What? Yes—” Please don’t let her have said any of that out loud. “What did you say?”

“I asked what was wrong.”

She’d got her fantasy mixed up with reality, that was what was wrong. “I realized I’ve been doing that thing I hate. Talking nonstop without coming up for air.”

“You weren’t talking nonstop. I talked too.”

“Not as much.” And she was mortified. He’d probably been thinking all the things she’d been thinking when she sat across from those men who didn’t know when to be quiet. “Why didn’t you stop me?”

“Because I found it interesting. I find you interesting. I didn’t want to stop you.”

“It was a monologue.” She knew her cheeks were pink. This was why she didn’t use blush. Combined with her own natural tendency to color up at the slightest hint of an awkward situation, she’d end up looking like a clown.

“It was not a monologue, but it did give me an insight into who you are. I feel I know you a little better now, which is good.”

“A little better? I gave you my whole life history. You know everything there is to know. Apart from the fact I had appendicitis when I was eight.”

He smiled. “Good to have your medical history too. Any allergies?”

“You mean apart from online dating?”

Why was it good that he knew her better? Why? What was the point?

What happened next? If she really fumbled her way through it perhaps he’d decide she needed more practice and date her again. If she was clever about it, it could wind up being her longest relationship ever.

Dessert arrived, a whipped confection of cream and she stared at it, thinking that it was like her life right now, sweet and perfect. But you couldn’t live on dessert, could you? And she wasn’t going to have a date like this again.

The candlelight sent flickers of light across his face, highlighting his lean, handsome features and those blue eyes that saw far too much. There was a faint hint of amusement in the curve of his mouth. She wished all dates could be as easy and relaxed as this one. She wished every moment of her life could feel like this, as if she were on the verge of something exciting and incredible.

She was enjoying herself so much she never wanted the evening to end.

Her head was spinning and she knew it wasn’t just as a result of the wine she’d drunk. It was being with Ethan.

She wondered what he’d be like in bed.

Confident.

Skilled.

Her face flamed. “Debra adores you. She used to talk about you all the time when I went round there. Her brother, the doctor. She’s very proud. You’re lucky being part of such a close family.”

“You’re close to your sister and brother.”

“Yes, but right now—” She broke off, feeling disloyal talking about it. She adored Fliss and Daniel, but they didn’t seem to understand that she didn’t need them to fix her life all the time. “They’re both super protective, and when I was younger I was grateful for that. But sometimes now it gets to be an issue. If I’m struggling with something, Fliss wants to fix it and Daniel wants to take out an immediate lawsuit. They don’t understand that if something needs fixing, I need to fix it for myself. And if it can’t be fixed, then I need to adjust the way I’m thinking to accept that.”

“Is this what Challenge Harriet is all about? Are you sending a message to your family?”

“No. Challenge Harriet is for me.” She finished her wine, wondering how much to say. “The thing is, in the last year both of them have fallen in love. I’m not sure Fliss ever fell out of love, but that’s another story. And because they’re in love, they feel guilty. They feel that they’re excluding me and the easiest way to fix that is by finding someone for me too. It would stop them worrying about me.”

He nodded. “So what you’re saying is that they’ve been pairing you up. Is that why you started internet dating?”

“Molly suggested it, but I’d already thought it was a good idea simply because it was the last thing in the world I wanted to do. Why are you laughing?”

“Because every other person I know avoids doing the last thing in the world they want to do. That’s why it’s called the last thing. And what you’re describing just seems to be the natural order of things. Siblings want you to be as happy as they are. Parents want grandchildren.”

Hers didn’t. Her mother had finally started living the life she wanted to live and was traveling all over the world. Her father had made it clear that he didn’t want his children in his life, so it seemed doubtful he’d want grandchildren. “But Debra has already given your parents grandchildren.”