Missing Dixie(15)

Red is very confused by this. I am, too—a little. The old me would’ve told her to meet me out back or in the kitchen or wherever my mind could conjure up on the spot. Technically I should be cock-blocking the hell out of Eaton for his previous f*ckup, but he was genuinely sorry and he’s the reason Leaving Amarillo got into Austin MusicFest to begin with, so in a weird way I kind of owe him. Guess this is the new me. Apparently I repay favors and shit. My addiction counselor would be so proud.

“Oh-kay,” she says slowly, with a noncommittal shrug. “Maybe I’ll do that. Your loss.”

“You’re absolutely right. Have a good night.” I nod curtly, dismissing her because I’m ready to be alone so I can figure out where the hell Dixie got off to. McKinley is dancing with the bride and Dallas is shooting the shit with his buddy the sound guy.

“Where did you go, Bluebird?” I mutter mostly to myself.

“Dance with me, drummer boy,” a voice calls out as I pass.

Well, shit. This time the woman making the demand is Robyn Breeland-Lark.

I may not be an expert on weddings, but I know you sure as hell don’t turn down the bride.

“Your wish is my command.” I smile and try not to bare my teeth at McKinley as he hands Robyn over to me.

She feels tiny and fragile in my arms and I’m almost afraid for her. She’s pregnant, something only a few people here know, which is nuts because Texas is Texas and shit gets around. Being privy to that delicate knowledge makes me feel like she’s made of glass, and I handle her accordingly.

“She’s outside decorating Dallas’s truck with lingerie and shaving cream and balloons and tin cans and all that silly, traditional stuff.”

“What?”

Robyn scoffs at me. “Come on, Gav. It may be my wedding day, so I’m a little distracted, but I know who you’re looking for. Who you’re always looking for.”

I smile in spite of the awkwardness of being busted. “Yeah? That obvious, huh?”

Robyn smiles and I realize she actually is glowing. I thought that was some sort of myth or a trick of lighting, but her skin seems to have a light of its own and it’s strangely comforting.

“Pretty obvious. You know what’s not obvious?”

“What’s that?” I spin Robyn in a circle and catch Dallas’s eye. He’s watching closely. I don’t know why this hurts my feelings, maybe because I just recently discovered that I have them, but it does. Dallas Lark knows all my shit and is on a first-name basis with my addictions and issues, but surely he knows me better than that. This is his wife, for f*ck’s sakes, and if anyone knows how deeply in love I am with his sister, it’s him. But I see it, the wolflike glint in his eye warning me to behave myself.

“Why you don’t just tell her the truth?”

My heart stutters in my chest. This is Dallas’s wife and Dixie’s best friend I’m talking to. She knows all my secrets and is close with the one person I never want to know them.

“Meaning?” I choke out over the significant stone of fear rising in my chest.

“Meaning you have been in love with Dixie Lark since we were kids, Gavin. And you and I both know how she feels about you. Even Dallas knows and has known, though he would rather not think about it, I’m sure. But this game you are playing, you and Dixie,” she clarifies. “It won’t end well if you aren’t honest with each other. Every second you spend in the dark about your feelings for each other is dangerous. People do stupid things when they’re hurt or sad or confused. Stop torturing each other and lay it out there. Or . . .”

“Or?”

“Or let her go, Gav,” she says softly. “Man up if you can’t be what she needs and deserves and let her go already. I can’t stand to see her hurting and closing herself off to everyone and everything while she waits for you to decide if she’s worth it or not. Life is too short to spend it pining for someone who will never come around, wishing for something you will never have, and holding on to something or someone that doesn’t want to be held.”

“Pregnancy has made you wise. And blunt.” I wink, and Robyn punches me playfully me in the chest.

“I was always honest. You know that. That’s why Dallas loves me, because I tell it like it is.”

“I love you for lots of reasons, babe.” Dallas reaches out to cut in and I step back and allow him to take my place.

“Good thing, because you went and knocked me up. Now you’re stuck with me.” Robyn winks, and I laugh, but in Dallas’s face I see pure love and adoration. If anything, she’s stuck with him because when Dallas Lark looks at any woman like that she is undeniably his for life.

“For the record, I was behaving myself,” I say quietly to Dallas. “That’s your wife, man. Congratulations. I’m happy for you.”

Dallas looks confused and I know the offense I took at his warning look and cutting in is probably misplaced.

“I know you were, Garrison. Far as I know, you want to see your next birthday, right?”

I shrug.

Honestly?

I could give a shit.

“Hey,” Dallas says, placing a hand on my chest. “I didn’t come over here to protect Robyn from you, man. I came over to protect you from her when I saw her punch you. She may be my wife but she’s also my sister’s best friend, so you are currently on the * list where Dixie is concerned. I didn’t want her getting her blood pressure up and decking you for real. Then I would’ve had to deck you for hurting her hand on your thick skull.”