Misadventures of a College Girl (Misadventures #9)(52)
I press my lips together.
“Plus, consider this. All those years you’ll be here at school, doing your thing, you’re going to be meeting lots of guys. And they’re all gonna want you the same way I did when I first laid eyes on you. The same way Hanalei did. The same way Jake did. The way everyone does when they see you.”
Jake? Hanalei? What?
“And maybe you’re going to want some of those guys in return, baby. Why not? You’ll be nineteen, twenty years old and understandably wanting to have some fun. God knows I’ve had my fun in college. Lots of it. Why shouldn’t you get to do that?”
“I’ll never want anyone but you,” I say evenly.
He smiles at me like I’m a puppy chasing my own tail. “I know you think that now, sweetheart. Thank you. But even if we somehow manage to slog through the next three or four years of an exclusive long-distance relationship during which we never see each other, we still wouldn’t get our happy ending after all that suffering. After graduation, you’ll be heading to New York to chase your dreams, exactly as you should. Exactly as you’ve promised you’ll do. And God knows where I’ll be.”
I’m drowning in panic. Completely blindsided. Hyperventilating.
Out of nowhere, an epiphany slams into me, and I grasp at it like a lifeline. TBD. Surely, Tyler included that line item under Phase Two of the syllabus because some piece of his brain wanted to leave the tiniest opening for us to continue together past the stupid five-week mark. Because Tyler knew in his bones we’d fall in love! “What was TBD?” I demand, my tone much harsher than intended. By God, I’m going to use Tyler’s own premonition of our love against him. I’m not going down without a fight!
Tyler stares at me blankly.
“On the syllabus,” I say. “You listed TBD as the last item under Phase Two. What did it refer to?”
Tyler looks at me ruefully but doesn’t speak.
“Tell me, Tyler. You knew you’d extend the five weeks even back then, didn’t you? You knew it!”
“It was a threesome, Zooey,” Tyler says flatly. “With Jake.”
I gasp.
“It was what Jake demanded to agree to swap Social Psych partners with me.”
I consciously close my hanging jaw.
“Jake had seen us together on the dance floor at the party, and he assumed we’d fucked upstairs right after that. Based on what he saw of you on the dance floor, he figured you were the kind of girl who’d jump at the chance to get double-fucked by the two biggest stars on the football team.” He scoffs. “Of course, I didn’t tell him the real deal about you or what actually happened between us that night. I don’t kiss and tell, unlike Jake the Snake.” He rolls his eyes. “God, Jake’s such a fucking douchebag these days, you have no idea. Ever since his break-up, Jake’s been on quite the tear with the ladies. Talk about a guy who only cares about getting his dick wet.”
The hair on my arms stands up.
“So, anyway, Jake wouldn’t agree to switch partners with me unless I promised to ask you about the threesome idea at some point during our partnership. So I was like, ‘Sure, Jake. Whatever. No promises, of course, but I’ll float the idea with her when the time is right.’ Honestly, Zooey, at that point, I would have said anything to get you as my partner.” His eyes darken. “And, yeah, if I’m being completely honest with you, the idea of both of us fucking you back then turned me on.”
“Tyler.”
“But all it took was our first night together, and I knew I’d never ask you about Jake. In fact, just that fast, the thought of him—or any man—laying so much as a pinky on you made me feel fucking homicidal.” He clenches his jaw. His eyes are blazing. “You want to know why I’ve been playing like a fucking maniac since I met you? Why I’ve been hitting twice as hard and making twice as many tackles and interceptions as I did last year?” He cups my face in his large hands. I’m trembling in his palms. “Because when I’m playing, all I have to do is imagine the ball is you, and I go fucking insane whenever anyone else so much as touches it.” He swallows hard. “Because that ball is mine.”
I open my mouth and close it. Holy shit.
“I love you, Zooey Cartwright,” Tyler says, his voice low and intense. “You’re the answer to a prayer I didn’t even know I had. You make me feel completely alive for the first time in my life. I’m a new man, thanks to you. Now that I’ve got you in my life, I can’t even imagine how I’m going to be happy without you ever again. But that’s exactly why I keep thinking maybe I should break things off with you now—just to save myself from getting absolutely decimated later. Let’s face it, baby, the only thing loving you is going to get me in the end is a broken heart.” He takes a deep, shuddering breath. His eyes are glistening and full of pain. “Zooey, baby, I’ve already had enough heartbreak to last me a fucking lifetime. I can’t take any more.”
Tears are streaming down my cheeks. He wipes them with his thumbs.
“Tyler, sweetheart, no one knows the future. Anything can happen. Think about it. Did you ever think in a million years you’d fall in love with me when you first met me at that party? And yet, here we are.”
Tyler runs the pad of his thumb over my lips. “Of course, I thought I’d fall in love with you when I met you at the party. I thought I’d fall in love with you the minute I saw you. Why do you think I turned you away that first night? Babe, I felt like I’d been struck by a thunderbolt, and it scared the shit out of me.”