Misadventures of a College Girl (Misadventures #9)(29)

“You’d better.”

“I take it things went well with Tyler?” Dimitri says to me. “After the way he lost his shit about you today on campus, I figured he’d turn on the charm.”

“It went great.” I exchange a loaded look with Clarissa. “He’s sweet.”

“Yeah? Glad to hear it. He’s got a rep for being a bit of a cocky dick sometimes, actually.”

“Not at all. He’s wonderful. He made me dinner. We did our homework. Made out a little. I’m seeing him again tomorrow night. Well, actually, tonight, I guess. We’re assigned to work on two class projects together, so we’ll be seeing a lot of each other this quarter.”

“Cool.” Dimitri heads toward the door. “If he’s ever a dick to you, though, let me know. I’ll beat him up for you.”

Clarissa and I giggle.

“Oh, hey, Dimitri,” I say. “I almost forgot. Tyler and I have to do some experiments for Social Psych, and we were wondering if you’d help us out?” I explain briefly what we’re planning to do, and both Clarissa and Dimitri say they’d be happy to assist us.

Finally, Dimitri leaves and Clarissa immediately leaps out of her bed, her face aglow.

“Did you and Tyler do it?” she asks.

“Three times.”

Clarissa squeals. “My little girl’s all grown up! And? Was Tyler’s T-shirt truth in advertising?”

“One hundred percent. He was a sex god, Clarissa. I couldn’t have picked a better de-virginizer if I searched the world over.” I sigh happily. “Tonight was sheer perfection.”

We plop ourselves down onto Clarissa’s bed, and I proceed to regale her with details of the night, and she oohs and aahs and squeals enthusiastically throughout my story. When I’m done talking, Clarissa tells me about how she and Dimitri hooked up tonight to “watch a movie”…and how midway through the opening credits that nerd shocked her by taking her into his arms and kissing the heck out of her.

“So are the rumors about nerds true?” I ask.

“I don’t know yet,” Clarissa says. “We just made out. But it was really hot and heavy. I’ve got high hopes it’s going to be damned good when it happens.”

“Oh, Dimitri’s been promoted from an ‘if’ to a ‘when’?”

“Definitely. But enough about me. I want to hear more about you and Tyler. Do you truly think you can handle sleeping with him for five whole weeks?”

“Well, if you mean will I die of sheer pleasure after five weeks with him, that’s a very real possibility.”

“No, I mean do you think you’ll be able to handle being his friend and nothing more after the five weeks are up?”

“Oh, that.” I bite the inside of my cheek. “Yeah, I think… Hmm.” I twist my lips, deep in thought. “Can I ask you something, Clarissa? When you had all that mind-blowing sex with that basketball player douchebag in high school, was there ever a moment when you felt like maybe you were falling for him? Not all the time, just when you were in the midst of pure ecstasy and—”

“No.”

“Hang on. I mean, not in real life, but when you were in the throes of ecstasy, and your toes were curling, and his voice was in your ear, and he smelled so good, and everything he did turned you on, did you ever think—”

“No. Not once, Zooey. Never did I ever think, even for a nanosecond, I might be falling for the douchebag.”

My stomach drops into my toes. “Oh.”

“You think you’re falling for Tyler?”

I shake my head. But then slowly nod. “Maybe?” I sigh. “I think if I’m not careful here, I’m in serious danger of turning into a Stage Five Clinger on him. Like, seriously.”

Clarissa twists her mouth. “Then I guess you’d better be careful, huh?”

I flap my lips together. “Crap.”





Chapter Sixteen





“A syllabus?” I ask incredulously, staring at the type-written paper Tyler just handed me.

Tyler’s eyes are sparkling. “I didn’t want to risk forgetting something important.”

I look down at the paper again.

SYLLABUS

The Miseducation of Zooey Cartwright

Instructor: Tyler Caldwell

Student: Zooey Cartwright

Course Objective: The complete sexual education and satisfaction of Miss Zooey Cartwright aka Eager Beaver.

Course Length: Five Weeks



The body of the document is broken up into two phases, each containing a laundry list of line items. In Phase One, the “suggested but not required” course topics are listed as:

Beginning Sexual Positions

Beginning Sexual Locations

The Art of the Blow Job

Zooey Gets Good at Getting Off During Oral

Zooey Gets Off During Intercourse!

Extra Credit: Zooey Gets Off While Giving Head



I look up from the paper again. “You’ve put some thought into this.”

“That’s the understatement of the century.”

My crotch is tingling. “How long do you think Phase One will last?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never done this before. We’ll just have to play it by ear. Do you have any questions about Phase One before we move on?”