Loving Dallas(77)

The last thought that flits through my brain before everything goes black is that I’m going to die without ever seeing my kid.

I’m going to die when I’ve only just realized I’ve been living my life all wrong.

The f*cking irony.





39 | Robyn

“HEY,” KATIE SAYS, POPPING HER HEAD INTO MY OFFICE. “I’M heading out and grabbing some dinner with Drew. I’ll probably stay at his place tonight but do you want me to go to your appointment with you tomorrow?”

I close out my email because my eyes are crossing. It’s finally here. Or it will be tomorrow anyway. The day I learn the sex of my baby. “Nah. I was going to ask Dallas’s sister to come. Or maybe my mom. She took the news better than I expected. But it’s like you said. This isn’t a conventional situation so I might as well get used to doing things on my own, right?”

“Robyn,” Katie says softly, stepping all the way into the room. “I didn’t mean it as a bad thing. I just meant—”

“It’s not a bad thing. It’s just . . . different.”

Katie gives me a weak smile. “I can only imagine just how different it is. But I’m also here for you, if you need anything. And just because he isn’t here doesn’t mean you have to do everything alone. You have me, and Dallas’s sister from the sound of it. And your mom, of course.”

My mom was beside herself ecstatic about becoming a grandma. I was expecting a lecture, or at least a strict talking to about responsibility. All I got were happy tears and hugs and promises that she is going to be here for me every step of the way.

I nod. “Thanks. I appreciate that.”

“I stocked the freezer full of ice cream last night, by the way. Help yourself,” she says as she stands to leave. “Promise you’ll tell me if there’s anything I can do. I was my sister-in-law’s Lamaze coach when my brother was serving overseas. I have excellent recommendations on my labor-assisting skills.”

I smile. “Thanks, roomie. I’ll keep that in mind.”

A pang of loneliness hits me unexpectedly. Katie won’t be my roomie much longer. She shouldn’t have to be woken up all hours of the night by a screaming baby. She’s not the one who got knocked up.

After shutting down my computer for the day, I grab my purse and head downstairs. Voices clamor up to me and I see a small crowd gathered around the front desk.

Alex and Bennett Martin are both standing with two police officers and a few girls from reception.

“ . . . serious injuries,” a voice from the speakerphone on the front desk says. “But we’re trying to find out about Renee now.”

“What’s going on?” I approach the group carefully. I can’t justify how I know that whatever’s going on somehow affects me, but I do. I can feel it.

Alex Martin turns to me, but it’s Katie’s face I see. She’s behind the group, standing with Drew, and she’s pale, looking at me like she’s afraid I might have yet another emotional meltdown.

“There was an accident on the BR-101. The convoy taking Jase Wade and his crew was involved. Renee Vasquez was among the injured, but she’s getting medical attention and should be fine.”

Renee is an international consultant for Midnight Bay. I’ve met her a few times but I don’t know her well.

“And the others?” My voice is leaving me as I yank my phone out of my purse.

My clumsy fingers drop my phone and Katie steps around and hands it to me. “Robyn . . . I have to tell you something. It’s about Dallas.”

No. No no no.

This isn’t happening. My Dallas, my sweet backward-ball-cap-wearing boyfriend from high school, the handsome man who exuded so much raw masculinity I was liquid in his hands every time he touched me, the famous musician who charmed a diner full of little girls, the father of my baby, he has to be okay.

He has to be.

“Breathe, Robyn,” Katie says, wrapping an arm around me. “They didn’t say he was hurt or anything. It’s just that he isn’t accounted for.”

“What does that even mean?”

I’m losing my shit in front of both of my bosses, but they’re still busy with the man on the speakerphone.

“It could mean anything. Maybe he’s fine and didn’t need medical attention.”

Or maybe he’s dead.

No, he can’t be. I would be able to feel that, wouldn’t I?

My hands are shaking, or maybe that’s my knees. All I know is that the world is moving too fast and I want to get off this ride right this second.

“Let’s get you home, okay?” Katie’s eyes are wide with concern and I watch helplessly as she motions Drew over.

“No,” I practically yell. “I’m staying right here by this phone until they say he’s okay.”

“We’ll keep you posted, Robyn,” Drew promises. “Go home and try to rest and I swear, the second we hear anything, you’ll be the first person I get in touch with. Cross my heart.” He makes a motion over his heart.

“He has to be okay,” I tell Katie as she practically drags me out of the building and to her car. “He has to be.”





40 | Dallas

THE FIRST THING I’M AWARE OF IS THE BLOOD. IT’S WARM, TRICKLING red trails down my arm.