Living Out Loud (Austen, #3)(53)

I offered another weak smile. “Rose’s best friend is with the New York City Ballet.”

She looked confused. “Well, thank you. But…why do you have them? Were they for you and me?”

“You said you’d never been to a Broadway show, and this isn’t a musical, but it’s actually on Broadway.”

“You didn’t answer me.”

I watched her for a moment. “Yeah, but you should go with your boyfriend.”

Her face shifted; the corners of her lips slipped down as her brows gently came together, and her eyes, which were already so big and shining, somehow grew in both size and depth. “What do you mean? Do you not want to go with me anymore? Are you…are you mad at me?”

“No,” I said as sick sadness wound through my guts and up into my chest, squeezing my heart until it stung. “No, I’m not mad at you, Annie.” The words were soft and serious.

“Tell me what happened with Will.” She searched my face, her sadness blooming. “He…he told me about your sister, and I—”

My jaw clamped shut. “What did he tell you?” I asked through my teeth. “Because he’s a liar, Annie.”

“Only his side. I’ve wanted to talk to you for days, but I’ve barely seen you to ask to hear yours. Please, tell me.”

I drew a long breath and chose my words very carefully. “He dated my sister in high school.”

She nodded, encouraging me to continue. I didn’t want to. But I did.

“He’s the master of saying all the right things at exactly the right time, and the longer it went on, the clearer it became that he didn’t care about her at all. He’s selfish and entitled, they fought constantly. And she accepted that behavior because she loved him. She broke up with him at a party, and there were rumors, rumors that had started with Will, all because he didn’t get his way.”

Her eyes widened, but she didn’t speak.

“I know you don’t know my sister, but I do. She loved him desperately, and he ruined her, made her life hell until she left for college. And I know this is just high school drama, but people like Will don’t change. Someone who would treat another with so little respect or regard doesn’t just grow up. It’s a dark part of them that doesn’t go away.” I sighed. “There are two versions of him—the one who wants something and the one who didn’t get what he wants. So, please—just promise me you’ll be careful.”

“I promise.” Her eyes shone with understanding. “If one of my sisters were hurt in any way, in any context, I would be unforgiving.”

“I know. And that’s why he and I can’t ever be friends.”

She reached for my hand, her fingers warm and soft around mine, her face wholeheartedly sincere. “Thank you for telling me how you feel and the other side of what happened. I…I hate that this happened between you, and I hate that I’m caught in the middle. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do, but I feel like I’m supposed to choose.”

Do it. Choose me. But I couldn’t do that to her. I couldn’t do it to myself.

My throat clicked when I swallowed. “I won’t make you choose, Annie.”

Annie looked down at our fingers. “You’re my friend, and I care about you. I don’t want to give you up any more than I want to give him up; your friendship is just as important to me as being with Will is. But I want to see this ballet with you.”

When she met my eyes again, her face was so ardent, so open, so absolutely beautiful in its honesty that I only gazed at her with my heart aching.

“Will you come with me?”

The word no had no place in my heart, not when it came to her. “Are you sure Will will be okay with it?”

“If he’s not, then we’ll have a bigger problem.”

The possibility of bigger problems with Will had its own appeal.

Could I do it? Could I be her friend? Could I put my feelings aside and take what I could get?

If the alternative was no Annie at all, there was only one thing to say.

“Anything you want, Annie.”

She brightened up again, eyes full of sunshine and spring grass, and I sighed, knowing what a magnificent mistake the whole thing was.

But with her happy, it was hard to care.

I didn’t see Annie much of the rest of the day, although we did eat enough of those donuts to almost make ourselves sick. There were only three left by the time her shift was ending, which was impressive by anyone’s standards.

As the time approached for her to leave, I found myself dreading it, wishing I had an excuse to get her to stay or get her to leave with me. It was relief I felt, a respite from the wanting, from the words that had hung between us since she’d walked through the door on Will’s arm. For an afternoon, things were like they used to be. Before him.

Just before Annie was off, a girl walked in and headed to the bar. She almost made it onto the stool when Annie pounced on her with a hug.

The girl laughed and hugged her back, and when Annie pulled away, she turned to me with her cheeks high and smiling.

“Greg, this is my big sister, Elle.”

“Nice to finally meet you,” she said with a smile and extended her hand, which I took.

“You too. I’ve heard a lot about you.”