Lilac Lane (Chesapeake Shores #14)(41)
“Okay, so this is what you’ve been telling me for weeks now that you really wanted to do. You’ve told your stepfather and he’s okay with it. Why don’t you look happier? Or at least relieved to have the discussion behind you?”
“Maybe reality’s setting in and I’m just seeing that changing directions like this is a whole lot scarier than I thought it would be,” she said carefully. She thought that sounded perfectly plausible, but she could read the skepticism in her roommate’s eyes. Behind that airhead persona was a straight-A student with a kind and generous heart and better intuition than Deanna had credited her with.
“You’re one of the bravest, most determined people I know,” Juliette said. “Why the second thoughts? Were you counting on your stepfather to stop you?”
Deanna actually paused to consider that possibility. It would have been less scary to stay on the road they’d always assumed she’d travel. Now, though, after this past weekend, it simply wasn’t possible. Too much had changed forever.
“You could be right,” she admitted. “Maybe on some level, I was hoping he’d say no and I’d do the safe thing, but it would have been the wrong choice. I wasn’t that excited by any of my business courses, and while I loved going to work with Ash when I was little and could wear the little hard hat he’d bought me, construction wasn’t in my blood, as it was in his.” She was confident of that much at least. And now she had all sorts of reasons to go to Baltimore that were even more compelling.
“So you’re going to Baltimore,” Juliette said. “Is Dr. Robbins ecstatic?”
“She had the arrangements made within an hour,” Deanna said, thinking of the one bright spot in all of this. Her mentor had, indeed, been ecstatic. But, then, she didn’t know the rest of the story, either.
Jules held out her hand. “Give me your book.”
Deanna regarded her with confusion. “Why?”
“Because if you don’t pass that anatomy exam with flying colors, none of this will mean much. I’m going to quiz you until you have it all down pat. I’m counting on your getting your degree in medicine and practicing right here in Charlottesville, so you can take care of my family, which I intend to start within months of graduating.”
Deanna chuckled. “Have you narrowed down the candidates you’ll consider marrying?”
Jules gave her a wicked grin. “The process is half the fun, but there are a few very good contenders. We’ll go over the list one of these days. You can give me your thoughts.”
“Given my lack of a social life, do you really think I’m remotely qualified to help you pick a husband?”
“You’ll be impartial. Some of them make me a little too giddy, so my judgment goes out the window. I want romance, of course, but I also want this to be a sound, rational decision.”
Deanna shook her head at the absurd declaration. “Something tells me you’re going to run off to a justice of the peace one night and my opinion won’t mean a blasted thing. Neither will anyone else’s.”
Juliette’s expression sobered. “Not a chance. That’s what my mother did the first time. And a couple of times after that,” she added ruefully. “My careful, methodical way is better, and nothing is going to throw me off course. I plan to marry only once, so I’d better get it right the very first time.”
Deanna didn’t want to tell her that life had a way of throwing you curveballs, just when you thought you had things all mapped out. Jules would learn that for herself soon enough. Deanna certainly had.
*
Taking Bryan at his word, early the next morning Kiera went over to the garden he’d planted, eager to spend an hour with her hands in the dirt doing something productive. She knew from her limited experience in Ireland just how close to nature it made her feel, how relaxing it could be.
She was about to tap on Bryan’s back door to let him know she planned to work in his yard, but the sound of his voice coming through the open kitchen window halted her hand in midair.
“It’s time to give up, isn’t it?” he said wearily to someone. “I should have done it years ago.”
Kiera was struck by the despondent note in his voice. She had a feeling whoever was on the other end of the line had given him yet more bad news. Perhaps it was the same person he’d been speaking to at the pub a couple weeks ago. That conversation had left him shaken in a way she didn’t entirely understand.
Though a part of her wanted to continue listening to try to get a sense of what was taking such an emotional toll on him, she couldn’t bring herself to eavesdrop a moment longer. She quickly retreated to the garden and knelt down, trying to focus on the task at hand.
The warmth of the sun on her shoulders would have been soothing at any other time, but she couldn’t seem to shake the memory of Bryan’s tone. If only he would open up with her, perhaps she could help. Something told her, though, that this was a burden he’d carried alone for a long time—long enough that he was finally conceding defeat. She knew what that was like. Hadn’t she given up on her attempts to help her sons straighten out their lives? Hadn’t it just about broken her heart to do so, even when she’d known there was no other choice? And hadn’t she been second-guessing herself ever since, especially when anyone questioned her about her sons?