Lev: a Shot Callers novel(30)
Lev was a blur, but in my mind, I could see every strong, powerful edge of his body as though the glass wasn’t even there. And what a sight it was. Impressive, fantasy as it was.
Part of me wanted to throw open the shower door and peer inside to look my fill.
I wondered what Lev’s reaction would be to that. Would he be offended, or would he be flattered? Would his body respond to blatant looks of appreciation? Putting my hand where I needed it most, I squeezed my legs together, desperate to find relief from the dull throbbing. All I really managed to do was make my nipples bead. I closed my eyes, biting the inside of my lip, savoring the warm flow taking over my body. Perhaps he’d pull me under the spray, take my mouth in a deep, feral kiss, and take me against the cool wall of the shower.
Yeah, right.
I removed my hand from between my legs, making my way over to the bathroom mirror. Rolling my eyes at the crazy thought, I wiped the foggy glass and stared at my flushed reflection. It was obvious I would never find out what Lev’s reaction would have been. I wasn’t that adventurous. He’d probably ask me to leave in that bored polite way that only Lev could pull off, leaving me humiliated.
I’d already had enough humiliation to last a lifetime. This was my time to shine, and if I wanted male companionship, I would have to look elsewhere.
My heart panged sorely. It was becoming clear I felt something for Lev. I spent the last few days trying to deny that fact, but I could no longer lie to myself. Why else would jealousy have my belly twisting in knots when Anika was around, touching Lev and pressing herself up against him?
I ran through it in my mind. I told myself that perhaps I had a deep regard for Lev, because he happened to be the person who saved me. Maybe if Sasha were the person to have helped me, I’d feel the same way for him that I do Lev.
My nose bunched. I understood that our circumstances were way out there, but somehow, I seriously doubted I’d ever feel for Sasha the way I felt about Lev.
It was more than an alliance, not quite a friendship. Not yet, anyway.
After speaking with Nas the previous week, I quickly came to realize that unless I was the person to make the effort, Lev and I would remain in this casual acquaintance. And I wanted more than that. I wanted to talk to Lev without feeling like I was intruding or prying. I wanted Lev to feel comfortable with me. I wanted a friendship.
And more than anything, I wanted to make him smile. Currently, Lidiya was the only person who could force a happy response from him. I wanted to change that.
Damn it. I was overstepping. I knew this. But it was now my mission. I would give anything to hear him laugh. I had a feeling it would be groundbreaking.
With a soft sigh, I flossed, picked up my toothbrush, brushed my teeth, rinsed with mouthwash, and then left the bathroom to sit on the bed and await Lev’s return.
I had a proposition for him.
Lying back on the bed, I didn’t have to wait long for the door to open and see Lev come out of the bathroom, dressed in black sweat pants and a tight white tee. The condensation on his body caused the shirt to stick, and I could easily make out his flat, dark nipples through the thin material.
“Working out?” I all but croaked out as I moved to sit up.
He let out an affirmative grunt, sitting on the edge of the sofa to put on his socks and sneakers. Then he looked up at me, his honeyed eyes narrowed in suspicion. “You’re up early.”
My lip twitched. “You say that like I have a motive.” I smiled and uttered an amused, “Okay, well, I sort of do.”
That statement caught his attention. His elbows on his knees, his arms hanging down between his open legs, he asked cautiously, “What do you need?”
I needed a lot more than he had up for offer, preferably those full lips on mine.
“I need,” I paused, pinning his eyes with my stare, “time to get to know you.”
Puzzlement crossed his face. “I don’t understand.”
That, I was coming to learn, was one of his favorite phrases. The other one being ‘I see’.
“I’ve lived here almost two weeks now. We’ve been under each other’s noses working together, eating together, living together, and still, I don’t know a thing about you, Lev. And I’d like to.”
His brows pulled low. “I see.”
And with that, I almost burst into a fit of laughter. But instead, I wove it into a bright smile. “Will you have lunch with me today? We’ll talk. Get to know each other a little better. Dig deeper than the surface.”
His face lost all expression and, for some reason, anxiety radiated from him.
I couldn’t handle it. I made my way over to him, taking his hand and sitting by his side. I spoke gently, “Why do you shut down when I ask you about yourself?”
His throat worked, and his response will stay with me forever. His voice equally as soft, he muttered, “I don’t know how to talk to people, Mina.” He squeezed my hand lightly. “I’m worried I’ll screw up, disappoint you.”
My reply was quiet but fierce. “You can talk to me about anything. I don’t think you could disappoint me, even if you tried. I just want honest conversation.”
Looking down at our hands, he ran his thumb over mine, straightened, and conceded, “Okay. Yes.” He paused then added, “I would like to have lunch with you, Mina.”
My shoulders bunched in time with my nose and, lifting my arms high in the air, I cheered, “Yay!”