Lead Me Home (Fight for Me #3)(31)

She reminded me a little of Nikki in that way, the way Nikki had been at her age, so eager to experience life; though, Nikki had done it with a tiny bit more fear.

Doses of hesitation coming on.

Careful.

It had always been Sydney who’d spur her on. Telling her to run. Jump. That she could do it.

I wondered when Nikki had decided to get so reckless.

Brave.

Which fucking sucked because the last thing I wanted was for her to be brave, constantly having to worry about the position she might be putting herself in. Stepping up when she thought it might right a wrong.

Make someone’s life better.

Even if it was just a conversation with a lonely old guy living on the street.

I beat back the direction my thoughts were going and instead focused on Frankie, who I was still spinning.

Her squeals of joy hit the air, and it didn’t take too long before I decided she had to have had enough and slowed to set her on her feet. Wasn’t surprised in the least when she went stumbling back toward the rest of the group, veering to the right, totally dizzy and off-kilter.

Had to admit, I felt a bit of that spin, too.

“She starts puking, and that’s on you. Hope you have a rag or two in your truck,” Rex shot in my direction as a smug grin tugged on his mouth.

He stood behind his tiny son, Ryland, who was facing out, both of the one-year-old boy’s hands in Rex’s as Rex helped him balance.

The little thing was doing his best to kick a soccer ball with his foot. Not moving it more than an inch but having a grand time doing it.

That shit was cute, that was for sure, the kid like a tiny version of his dad.

Sometimes it still fucked with my head to see Rex this way. Guy’d been one of my closest friends for pretty much all of my life.

He’d taken it about as hard as I had after Sydney had disappeared. Angry at the whole damned world because ours had been rocked, none of us able to make sense of something so brutal actually taking place.

Shocked.

Traumatized.

It’d taken that sweet little girl being born for his hardened pieces to start chipping away, meeting Rynna stripping the rest to the ground.

Disquiet tumbled through me. A rumble in that dark space. Sometimes it was hard to watch. Time moving on. People moving on. Sometimes, I wished that I could, too.

Didn’t matter if I wished for it or not. Knew I’d forever be a captive of that day.

I shoved the thoughts down and snatched up the ball where I’d dropped it and pointed it his direction. “You wish, man. Puke duty is not a part of my repertoire.”

Kale, who had been kneeling in front of Evan, pushed to standing and threw me a grin as he jumped into the conversation. “This from the guy who owns a bar and his sole purpose in life is to get people tanked. I’m pretty sure Olive’s has played host to a hurl or two.”

Kale was our opposite. All clean-cut lines and cleaner jaw, his title of pediatrician fitting him to a tee.

“Not a chance, man. Olive’s is the classiest of establishments. Assholes get trashed, and they’re out on their asses. Now you want to talk about what goes down on the front sidewalk in the middle of the night? That’s an entirely different story.”

“Language, man,” Rex said, angling his head to the side. Knew the look on his face. If we’d been fifteen, that would have been delivered with a punch.

“Sorry.”

Kale laughed. “Leave it to the bachelor not to be able to figure out how to act around kids.”

He glanced down when Evan reached up and tugged him by the hand to get his attention.

Evan’s hands flew through the air, quickly signing something I couldn’t read.

Kale smiled like a damned fool and signed back.

My chest tightened like the yank of a belt.

Evan’s adoption had just gone through. I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen the guy happier than that day.

Not that he needed the paper. Pretty sure the guy felt that way from moment one.

Loved seeing my crew happy. Finding love after all the bullshit that’d been tossed our way through the years.

Brutal blow after fucking brutal blow.

Two of them had always had my back, stood beside me during the toughest time of my life.

Both of them had handled it differently.

Rex had fallen into that anger and grief right along with me. Like he’d wanted to take some of it on, shoulder some of the burden like he might be able to grant me some relief, ridden with a dark empathy when I didn’t think he really had the first clue what I was going through.

Sydney hadn’t been his responsibility. Hadn’t been the one who was supposed to watch after her. Keep her safe.

Kale had stood up and become the rock and had been the one to eventually encourage me to move on. To find the bright side when my entire life had gone dark.

I waved back, moving Evan’s direction and leaning down in front of him. I ruffled a hand through his red hair.

“Hey, little man,” I told him, knowing he’d be able to read my lips. “Did you see what I brought?”

He dropped to his knees with that pad he used for communication, scribbled something quick. He turned it for me to see what he’d written, excitement streaking across the mass of freckles that dotted his pale face.

You brought my truck? I’m saving all my money from my chores so I can buy it when I get my license. I’ve got twenty dollars. Is that almost enough?