Lady Be Reckless (Duke's Daughters #2)(44)

“No. Not yet.” And maybe not ever, if what Pearl was suggesting and Olivia herself had wondered was true. Had she fallen out of love with Bennett? Had she ever been in love with him at all?

“What kind of kiss was it? The kind that says ‘thank you for the dance, I’ve had one glass too many of champagne, and there’s your cheek’?” But judging by the way Pearl said it, she knew perfectly well it wasn’t that kind of kiss.

“How would you know anything about any kisses at all?” Olivia glared at her sister, whose expression did not change.

Pearl was very good at keeping her own counsel. Nor would she be deterred when she had questions. “No, not that kind of kiss.” How could she put it? She settled herself cross-legged on the bed, dislodging the sleepy kitty, which growled and then went right back to sleep. The other kitten was playing with a ribbon on her gown.

“You know how when you’re reading one of those novels like that mystery one? And it’s so good and so enthralling, and you can’t believe the things that are happening in it. And you’re rushing so fast to read it, only you don’t want it to ever end, since then it will be over.”

“Ooohhh,” Pearl replied in a soft exhale. “That sounds wonderful.”

“It was.” Olivia lowered her face to stick her nose into Snapper’s fur. As much for the kitten’s cuteness as so Pearl couldn’t see her expression right then. Because she was fairly certain it would reveal a certain amount of regret, and her fascinated wish to do it again, and confusion about just how she felt now about everything.

And Pearl would see it all and would no doubt have something to say about it. For a relatively quiet person, Pearl could definitely talk a lot.

“So does that mean he is courting you? Are you the respectable lady who will marry him and make him respectable too?”

The thought should have occurred to her before, what with the kissing and all, but it simply hadn’t. She straightened like a shot, a few cat hairs wafting about in the air in front of her nose, and stared at Pearl.

“No, of course not.”

“Because you still think you’re going to marry Lord Carson?” Pearl asked in a gentle tone. The one she used right before she gave Olivia some hard truths.

Olivia thought she knew the truths already, so perhaps they could skip that part.

“I don’t think that any longer.” Now it was Pearl’s turn to look surprised.

It felt as though Olivia’s world was shifting, again. She’d thought for so long that she would marry Bennett—Lord Carson—that admitting it wasn’t true felt as revelatory as when she had realized there was more to life than parties and gowns.

She licked her lips, which had become dry. “I think if I am so easily able to kiss somebody like Mr. Wolcott without thinking of Lord Carson, then it is probably true that I am not, actually, in love with Lord Carson after all.” Dear lord. I am not in love with Bennett. I might never have been in love with Bennett.

Who am I? Who will I be?

The thoughts came fast, making her feel as though she were spinning in a circle, her brain going faster and faster until she couldn’t think anymore.

Pearl’s eyes widened as Olivia spoke, and then she smiled, a warm smile that felt lit up from the inside. “Oh, thank goodness. I was worried I was going to have to toss you over a horse and gallop away from the church with you. You can’t marry him—that’s clear enough.”

Olivia couldn’t help the pique in her tone. “Clear enough? Why is it clear enough? Because he is handsome and intelligent and wants to do the right things and is of our world and was supposed to marry Eleanor until his brother stole her?”

Pearl rolled her eyes. “Look, you and I agreeing on this very important matter—the matter of your future life—does not mean you should be defensive about it. It does happen, our agreeing sometimes.” She gestured to the kittens in Olivia’s lap. “We agreed these little ones should be saved from the Robinsons’ gardener, although we still don’t know what we’re going to do with them. They should be running around free somewhere, not stuck in our rooms in London.”

Olivia grinned at the thought that popped into her head, making Pearl look at her suspiciously.

“I have an idea,” she said.





Chapter 14




Offer gifts chosen for the recipient, not for the giver.

Lady Olivia’s Particular Guide to Being Reckless



Olivia approached the front door not with anxiety—she was never anxious; she always knew just what she was doing and why. No cause for concern, ever.

But she had to admit to feeling a little off. Whether it was that she’d realized she didn’t actually love the love of her life, of that the last time she’d seen Mr. Wolcott was supposed to have been the last time she’d see him.

And that same last time was also the last time she’d kissed him, and then he’d kissed her, and everything was a muddle, and she didn’t know what to think anymore, so it was not surprising she felt a little off. Which was a vast understatement of how confused and lost she felt.

Besides which, she had two wriggling kittens tucked into her jacket, and even her ability to withstand discomfort in the service of doing good was having trouble against all those tiny kitten claws.