Knocked up, by her best friend's dad.(5)
Jamie grunted. “Some motherfucker got Hannah pregnant, and from what I’ve gotten from her, it’s someone I know, because it happened at the house warming party.” He rubbed his head. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Dad, what am I going to do?”
My whole body froze. My heart beat so loud I was sure people down the block could hear it. I could hear Jamie talking, but after he said Hannah was pregnant, my whole world stopped.
How the fuck had I done it again? I never fucked without a condom, even when a woman said they were on the pill. I’d learned my lesson thanks to Jamie, not that if I was given the choice to go back and change things I would. I loved my son, he’d turned out to be the best thing to happen to me. A baby. Hadn’t I just gotten my life back, now that my nest was empty? Fuck, could I do it all again? At least this time I knew what to expect. I was stable now, owning my own company and house. I could have a child and a wife. This wasn’t the same as what happened with Jamie’s mother. No. I mentally shook my head. It was different this time, I loved the woman I’d gotten pregnant, and I knew without a doubt that Hannah would want to be a mother, and she would be an amazing one, that I was sure of.
Jamie shook me and yelled. “Dad. Hey, Dad. It’s okay. Snap out of it. Dad. Dad, it’s all good I’m going to kill the guy.”
Blinking and stepping back from Jamie, I grimaced as what he said sank in. Fucking hell, how was I going to tell him that the arsehole who’d knocked Hannah up was me? Scrubbing my face with my hand in frustration, I closed my eyes and tried and think of what I needed to do. Why hadn’t Hannah gotten in contact with me? Why was I only now finding out? I needed to talk to her. I didn’t want to tell Jamie anything until I’d spoken to Hannah.
“Dad, can we do tonight’s celebration tomorrow? I want to be with Hannah tonight. I feel she needs me more than us going out. She’s been really sick. Tonight, she was so bad her whole body was shaking for awhile after emptying the contents of her stomach. She’s lost weight, and I want to discuss an action plan with her. She needs to see a doctor.”
My chest puffed out and I was filled with so much pride, even as I wanted to tell him that what he wanted to do was my job, because the baby was mine. I was so proud that I raised him right; that he'd look after his friend above what he wanted for himself. I should be the grown up and confess, but I knew now was the time for me to learn how my son felt. “That’s okay, Jamie. I understand. You stay here and look after her. Why don’t we sit and talk for a moment first?”
He nodded. “You want a beer?”
“Yeah.” I moved to the lounge room and sat on the sofa. Not long after, Jamie followed and sat on a two-seater sofa across from me, passing me an open beer. I took a sip. “So how you feeling other than angry?”
Guilt assaulted me at my behavior, my feelings, and my actions, as my son’s shoulders dropped and he looked defeated.
“I thought when we moved in together, she would start to finally see that we're perfect for each other. I thought she’d see how good we are together.”
“You could be good with a lot of women. You’re best friends, so of course you’re good together. Are you in love with her, or do you think you could be?”
Jamie sat back on the seat and sighed. “I love her.”
“Yes, but are you in love with her? There are different kinds of love, Jamie. There's the friendship kind, the brother/sister kind, family love, and then there's the all-consuming, lust-filled can’t live without them, in love. Which are you? Think about it, especially now that she’s pregnant.” I was a douche, but I knew how I loved Hannah, and I needed to know where my son stood.
Jamie sat quiet for awhile and then in a small whisper he said, “I don’t know, Dad. I haven’t even ever kissed her, well not on the lips.”
“Okay, let me put it this way. How would you feel if the baby daddy came into play and she ended up dating, falling in love, and married him? How would you feel about that?”
“I…I…don’t know. I’d like to think I’d be happy as long as she was happy, but I don’t know.” He chuckled, but it was empty. “You know she's always had a huge crush on you, right?” He put his finger to his lips. “Shh, don’t tell her I told you.”
My throat seemed to close over and I couldn’t reply. It was for the best though, because I didn’t want to have to lie to Jamie. It was bad enough I wasn’t telling him what had happened and how I felt. My heart that was still beating loudly, quickened at the secret he told.
Jamie sat forward again and smirked at me. “Actually, I have always been jealous of how she feels about you. She’s told me she loves you, but you probably don’t feel the same, not like that, more like she’s a daughter.”
Choking on my spit, I felt my eyes go wide and I sputtered. “No. No, I don’t think of her as my daughter.” I was setting that straight right away. “Sure, she’s a part of our family, but I do not see her as your sister or anything like that.”
“Woah, Dad. It’s cool. I get it.”
Oh, I bet he didn’t, but until I spoke to Hannah, I wasn’t going to set my son to rights.
I stood. “I’ll leave you here to look after Hannah. I’ll come and cheek on her tomorrow while you’re at practice.” I would come after work. I finished on Saturdays at midday. If I told him I was checking on her tomorrow, Jamie wouldn’t rush home and that would give me a chance to talk to her.