Klara and the Sun(8)
Again I nodded, and this time Josie appeared to be reassured.
‘That’s so good.’ The smile returned to her face. ‘You’ll love it, I’ll make sure you do.’ She looked back, this time in triumph, calling: ‘Mom? See, she says she wants to come!’
The Mother gave a small nod, but otherwise didn’t respond. She was still staring at me, her fingers pinching at the coat material. When Josie turned back to me, her face had clouded again.
‘Listen,’ she said, but for the next few seconds remained silent. Then she said, ‘It’s so great you want to come. But I want things straight between us from the start, so I’m going to say this. Don’t worry, Mom can’t hear. Look, I think you’ll like our house. I think you’ll like my room, and that’s where you’ll be, not in some cupboard or anything. And we’ll do all these great things together all the time I’m growing up. Only thing is, sometimes, well…’ She glanced back quickly again, then lowering her voice further, said: ‘Maybe it’s because some days I’m not so well. I don’t know. But there might be something going on. I’m not sure what it is. I don’t even know if it’s something bad. But things sometimes get, well, unusual. Don’t get me wrong, most times you wouldn’t feel it. But I wanted to be straight with you. Because you know how lousy it feels, people telling you how perfect things will be and they’re not being straight. That’s why I’m telling you now. Please say you still want to come. You’ll love my room, I know you will. And you’ll see where the Sun goes down, like I told you the last time. You still want to come, right?’
I nodded to her through the glass, as seriously as I knew how. I wanted also to tell her that if there was anything difficult, anything frightening, to be faced in her house, we would do so together. But I didn’t know how to convey such a complex message through the glass without words, and so I clasped my hands together and held them up, shaking them slightly, in a gesture I’d seen a taxi driver give from inside his moving taxi to someone who’d waved from the sidewalk, even though he’d had to take both hands off his steering wheel. Whatever Josie understood from it, it seemed to make her happy.
‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘Don’t get me wrong. It may not be anything bad. It may only be me thinking things…’
Just then the Mother called and started to move towards us, but there were tourists in her way, and Josie had time to say quickly: ‘I’ll be back really soon. Promise. Tomorrow if I can. Bye just for now.’
* * *
—
Josie didn’t return the following day, or the day after that. Then in the middle of our second week, our turn in the window came to an end.
Throughout our time, Manager had been warm and encouraging. Each morning, as we’d prepared ourselves on the Striped Sofa and waited for the grid to rise, she’d said something like, ‘You were both wonderful yesterday. See if you can do just as well today.’ And at the end of each day, she’d smiled and told us, ‘Well done, both of you. I’m so proud.’ So it never occurred to me we were doing anything wrong, and when the grid came down on our last day, I was expecting Manager to praise us again. I was surprised, then, when after locking the grid, she simply walked away, not waiting for us. Rosa gave me a puzzled look, and for a moment we remained on the Striped Sofa. But with the grid down, we were in near-darkness, and so after a while we rose and came down off the platform.
We were then facing the store, and I could see all the way to the Glass Table at the back, but the space had become partitioned into ten boxes, so that I no longer had a single unified picture of the view before me. The front alcove was in the box furthest to my right, as might be expected; and yet the magazines table, which was nearest the front alcove, had become divided between various boxes, so that one section of the table could even be seen in the box furthest to my left. By now the lights had been dimmed, and I spotted the other AFs in the backgrounds of several boxes, lining the walls mid-store, preparing for their sleep. But my attention was drawn to the three center boxes, at that moment containing aspects of Manager in the act of turning towards us. In one box she was visible only from her waist to the upper part of her neck, while the box immediately beside it was almost entirely taken up by her eyes. The eye closest to us was much larger than the other, but both were filled with kindness and sadness. And yet a third box showed a part of her jaw and most of her mouth, and I detected there anger and frustration. Then she had turned fully and was coming towards us, and the store became once more a single picture.
‘Thank you, both of you,’ she said, and reaching out, touched us gently in turn. ‘Thank you so much.’
Even so, I sensed something had changed – that we had somehow disappointed her.
* * *
—
We began after that our second period mid-store. Rosa and I were still often together, but Manager would now change our positions around, and I might spend a day standing beside Boy AF Rex or Girl AF Kiku. Most days, though, I’d still be able to see a section of the window, and so go on learning about the outside. When the Cootings Machine appeared, for instance, I was on the magazines table side, just in front of the middle alcove, and had almost as good a view as if I’d still been in the window.