King's Reign (Sydney Storm MC #6)(78)

I laughed. “Do you want some help, honey?”

She flashed me a huge grin. “I thought you’d never ask.”

We spent the next hour tidying up and getting the muffins packed and ready to be delivered to her mother later that day. At about two a.m. I crawled into bed, exhausted after a long day, but sleep eluded me. Thoughts of Storm and my life before I left assaulted me, and as much as I tried to avoid them, I couldn’t.

I’d been in a living hell for most of the year prior to leaving Brisbane. To be honest, it began before that. It started after Rob attacked me which was almost two years before I left, back when I was dating J, the guy who I thought would be my forever. Our relationship had never been the same after J killed Rob when he attacked me. J blamed himself for the attack and I blamed myself for J killing him.

That night had started like any other for me. I’d gone to work at Hyde’s, a local bar. Rob worked with me as a bartender and we’d had a fun night with all the regulars. However, after close, while I was waiting for J to pick me up, Rob had turned on me and attempted to rape me in the car park outside the bar. J was late picking me up and arrived mid attack, just as Rob had pulled a knife on me and slashed my arm. Five minutes later, Rob was dead after J shot him and so began our descent into hell.

J and I had been together for a little over two years at that point. We’d been great friends for a lot longer than that. He’d joined Storm when he was nineteen. I was a seventeen-year–old schoolgirl at the time and fell hard for him. However, nothing but flirting happened between us for six years, and during that time, we built a strong friendship. Our relationship as a couple had been fiery. We couldn’t get enough of each other, but at the same time, we argued constantly. Our main problem stemmed from the club. J didn’t involve me in club business, annoying the hell out of me. I wanted to be a part of every aspect of his life and when he refused to talk about the club with me, I felt closed off from part of him, which led to many arguments.

In the end though, what tore us apart was our inability to deal with the fallout from Rob’s death. After the attempted rape, J tried to wrap me in cotton wool. He constantly monitored my whereabouts and tried to dictate where I could go and what I could do. I was not a woman who could cope with that style of relationship. On top of that, I’d started drinking heavily. Feeling responsible for Rob’s death and being unable to work through my feelings associated with that, I’d resorted to shutting it all out by hitting the bar.

It started out as a bit of fun, but quickly spiralled into an addiction I couldn’t get under control. J had lived with an alcoholic parent and had no tolerance for drinking to excess. He tried desperately to get me help but I blocked all his attempts. This went on for almost a year and the final nail in our coffin had been Jodie, a club whore who J had supposedly cheated on me with. I’d believed the rumours, or perhaps I had wanted to, simply to have an excuse to walk away from the hard work our relationship had become. Sometimes it didn’t seem like love was enough when everything else was a struggle.

The year after I left J was the lowest point in my life. My drinking was worse. I had shut myself off from family and friends, and I had hooked up with a violent and controlling biker from Storm’s rival club, Black Deeds. Nix was the VP of Black Deeds and getting involved with him had angered my father, brother and J. This had been a good reason for me to continue the relationship because at the time, they were all pissing me off and it felt good to return the gesture. A couple of months into the relationship, I discovered that J hadn’t cheated on me. I was gutted that I’d thrown our relationship away so easily because of a lie, and went to him to apologise for not believing in him. That had been a turning point for me because we rekindled our friendship and he tried to help me get my life back on track. The problem was that Nix wasn’t about to give me up that easily. Although we had only been together for a very short time, he was committed to keeping us together. He didn’t like my friendship with J and the day he worked out I was still in love with him was the day he almost beat me to death. That was the day my life turned in a new direction and led me to where I was now.

I hadn’t spoken to J in over two years. I’d also stayed sober in that time. Moving away from Storm saved my life. The problem was, I felt dead on the inside. I was a twenty-nine year old single woman just going through the motions of life. Sure, I had a job, good friends, and a great social life. On the outside, my life looked like fun. But it wasn’t real. And I didn’t know how to make it any better.

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