Iniquity (The Premonition, #5)(13)

“What are you going to do?”

“Learn my secrets, Evie,” he says, “if you want to stay ahead of me.”

“Tell me why I’m here or I’m not telling you anything. What’s my mission?”

Xavier grips the steering wheel in front of him, bending it. “You came here for me.”

“Why would I do that?”

“It was the only way we could be together. You made some kind of deal—you agreed to come here for one last lifetime, and then...then we’re together forever—that’s what you told me before you came here.”

“Just like that? I push Russell away, like I never loved him? Like our lifetimes together meant nothing?”

“Not just like that. I’ve been your guardian from the day you were created. You’ve no idea what we’ve endured to be together. I’ll do whatever it takes. You’re worth it to me.”

My chest feels tight. “What’s the deal I made exactly? I said I wanted to be with you? I negotiated that?”

“I’m not sure exactly. You couldn’t tell me. I just know you promised to come here so that you could have a love of your own choosing.”

I hold up my hand. “Whoa. Hold up. You mean I didn’t name you?”

“You meant me,” he says with absolute certainty. “It’s me you love. I was with you in every one of your lifetimes. When you died and Russell stayed on Earth, we were together in Paradise. When he died first, I always stayed with you in the shadows, watching, waiting. Now, it will be you and me until the end of time.”

I don’t want to believe him. I push that aside. “What, exactly, am I supposed to do here? What is the goal of my mission?” I raise my arms and look around. “What did I have to agree to so that I could be with you?”

“You had to come here and you did that. You don’t have to do anything else. I’ll do the rest.”

“But if I was sent here—”

Xavier rubs his forehead in irritation. “No one is playing by the rules anymore, Evie,” he growls. “I’m not going to lose you because they might see a compromise as the better option.”

“Who are they—Heaven? I’ve been told Heaven doesn’t compromise. Brennus believes there’s another like me—a half-breed human angel with a soul—and I’m not talking about Russell.”

Xavier looks murderous, as if I’ve just delivered the worst news of his life. “Brennus cannot be trusted.”

“I believe him. He has connections and his connections say that Sheol has created a half-breed angel—a male version of me.”

“If it’s true, I’ll kill the spawn,” he replies.

My eyes widen at the slur. “The spawn?”

“The demon half-breed—Sheol’s abomination.”

“You think I’m an abomination?”

Xavier scowls at me. “You’re nothing like the monster from Sheol. You’re a divine half-angel, not a fallen demon’s offspring with a corrupted soul. When did Brennus tell you about the evil half-breed? Was it while he was attempting to murder you at his castle?”

His derision isn’t lost on me. “Not exactly,” I fumble. I don’t want to explain how I was given this information. “Why did Heaven make you ascend, and then let you come back?”

“Sheol adapts.” A humorless smile spreads as his lips thin. “Heaven had to adapt as well. You needed to learn certain skills that they were sure would be taught more effectively by others, at least that’s what they told me when I was taken back.”

“Like what?” I whisper. “What did I need to learn?”

“Survival.” He drops his chin as he confesses, “I sent you Jim...in the cave in Houghton—when Brennus nearly killed you. I thought your uncle would help. Did he?” Instantly, my eyes brighten with tears. I fight them and manage not to shed any, but I’m only capable of responding with a nod. Xavier looks away from me, out the window at some distant memory. “I didn’t know what to do. Your dying meant your soul would come back to me...but then we’d never be allowed to be together. Whatever your mission is, you have to win it no matter what. If you don’t, you and I will be separated. I will no longer be your guardian angel.

“I became too emotional after that. From then on, they cut me out of most of the intel on you. Tau was the only one who’d tell me what was happening with you, but they weren’t giving out much information to him either.”

“Why kill the other half-breed angel—”

His eyes snap back to mine. “I told you, he’s not a half-breed angel. He’s a demon—spawned from a fallen angel with a thoroughly damned soul.”

“How am I supposed to find him?”

“I’ll find him.”

I shiver. “Why does he have to die? He could’ve so easily been me. There was a time when I thought that I was an evil demon half-breed, X,” I whisper my confession, looking at my hands in my lap before glancing at him.

Sadness shows in his eyes. “How could you think that, Evie? There’s nothing evil about you.”

I force a shrug as I say in a small voice, “I just did.”

With quiet rage, Xavier says, “If I’d been here, you’d never have thought that. Not for one moment.”