In A Holidaze(14)

“You didn’t, by chance, get into my little blue bag, did you?” he asks.

“No, of course not!”

“Okay, good. Because I had this friend who grows mushrooms in his closet, and he gave me—”

“Benny, I’m not high, I’m not drunk, I’m not on mushrooms! I’m being serious. This is freaking me out!”

“I know it is, Mae. Okay, I’m thinking.”

Downstairs, I hear the faint sounds of everyone making their way to the living room for welcome cocktails. I screw my eyes shut, trying to pull forward all the tiny details that I never expected to be important, but which are the difference now between Benny believing me or not. Kyle’s round, theatrical voice carries upstairs, followed by Ricky’s deep, booming laugh.

“Oh. Oh.” I snap, pointing at the door. “Kyle just showed Ricky his new tattoo.”

Benny stretches, listening. “Did you hear that all the way up here? Wow.”

“No,” I say. “I remembered it.”

I can tell he doesn’t totally buy that.

Zachary’s elated laughter reaches us, and I can’t help it—despite all the chaos in my head, I’m smiling. “Okay. Miso is licking Zacky’s toes. Listen to him laughing.”

“A pretty safe guess,” Benny hedges. “That dog loves the twins.”

I sigh. “Come on. Believe me.”

“I want to, but you know how this sounds.”

The problem is, I do.

“Let’s say you’re right,” he whispers, “and what you’re telling me is really happening. It’s sort of like Back to the Future, except the past. Wait.” He shakes his head. “He went to the past in that one, didn’t he?”

I nod, and then keep nodding because exhaustion drags through me so heavily that I could honestly pass out right now.

“Does that make me Doc?” he asks.

I laugh. “Sure.” But my amusement quickly fades. “But what do I do? Is this happening so I don’t kiss Theo again? This seems like a pretty lame flex, Universe.”

“But without kissing Theo you wouldn’t be here,” he reasons.

“No. Kissing Theo is where I messed things up . . . right?”

“No. It’s like in Avengers, where they want to go back and kill the guy with the stones, but if they had killed him then they wouldn’t be having the conversation to begin with.” He pauses. “Holy shit, time travel is confusing.”

I rub my temples. “Benny.”

He gazes at me, and I stick the tip of my thumb in my mouth, chewing. “I think you should go talk to Dan,” he finally says.

“Dad? He’s the most literal and scientific person I’ve ever met. He would not for a second believe that I’m either a time traveler, a superhero, or clairvoyant.”

Benny laughs. “I mean because he’s a doctor.”

“Yes, a doctor who knows birth canals and umbilical cords.”

His voice is gentler now, because I’m clearly not following along. “I’m sure he remembers the basics enough to check your pupils and reflexes.”

Oh.

“Like for a head injury? That’s really what you think this is?”

Benny squares his hands on my shoulders. “I believe that something’s going on with you. But that’s all I’m qualified to do—believe you. I’m not sure I’m qualified to help. Your dad can tell you if everything seems to be working the way it should.”

Maybe that’s the ideal situation—something neurological happening. I mean, otherwise this is impossible, right?

“Okay.” I kiss Benny’s cheek and step back, nodding. “Plan A: assume I’m injured or crazy.”

Benny’s sweet smile crashes. “I did not say that.”

“I’m kidding. I’ll go talk to Dad.”

With a little wave, I turn to the attic steps but I miss the first one. My leg comes out from under me and instead of falling backward, I pitch forward, slip, and—





chapter seven


“AHHHHHHHH!” I wake up shouting loudly, startling from the sensation of falling down a steep flight of stairs. My arm shoots out to the side to catch the banister. But there’s no banister there, no stairs. I smack my brother directly in the face again.

He lets out a rough oof and catches my arm. “Dude. What the hell, Mae?”

Bolting upright, I’m already sweating. I reach for my neck. Do I look like a corkscrew? Is my head on the right way? Can I see my own butt? I slump with relief until I notice the same white-noise hum of an engine, the same dry, recirculated air. The same everything.

“No,” I whisper, heart pounding. Not again.





chapter eight


Benny stares at me. He blinks slowly, and I silently watch him try to process all of this. Again.

“I feel like I’m following you down this road pretty easily, friend.” He frowns, worried. “Are you sure you’re not having some sort of altitude-poisoning thing?”

Taking a deep breath, I rub my temples and remind myself to be patient; Benny doesn’t know he’s been through this before. He doesn’t know he just asked me this same question. Whatever time loop I’ve tripped into isn’t his fault.