Honor Among Thieves (The Honors #1)(27)

Carefully I drew my hand away and followed Marko into what I recognized from the orientation classes as our common room. The furnishings were lush and human-made, and I wondered if all this human-added stuff felt uncomfortable for the ship, like a human wearing braces on his teeth.

There was also a familiar data console—again, like the one I’d used in orientation week classes, with all its inputs. Marko recapped how to use it while I stared up at the curves and hollows of the ceiling; it reminded me first of a church, and then of the top of a human mouth. It was impossible not to feel a little overwhelmed by the collision of the familiar and the strange.

“Zara? Are you listening?” Marko sounded just a touch impatient. I quickly pulled my attention back to him.

“Sure,” I lied, and I could see he knew it.

“For the first day, you’ll be free to relax a bit. Then Nadim will take you on a short trip. By which I mean, within the Sol system. After that, the second phase of your training begins. The console has all the information regarding your schedule and the goals you must achieve.”

“Question,” I said. “What if we don’t? Achieve. Do you bring us back to Earth?” Not that I was intending to fail, but better to be prepared. Next to me, Beatriz still seemed blurry from the relaxers. I couldn’t tell if she was going to be able to handle this.

Nadim answered me. “I’m certain you will do fine,” he offered, “and I will be of assistance in any way I can. The projects you will be working on are of benefit to both of our species. If you fail, then I fail too.”

He absolutely had a mind of his own, though I should ask about pronouns. Regardless, it sounded like he intended to be a partner. In a way, that was great because there were three of us here, not just two. But it also meant that if Nadim had his own goals, and his own agendas . . . then we could be at odds.

That put me on edge, again. Because as soon as we left orbit, there would be nowhere left to run. My breath went in a sudden rush. Maybe space wasn’t freedom after all. What if it was a wasteland, and I was in a lifeboat that could turn on me at any time? Something clearly went wrong for Gregory Valenzuela. Maybe that was just his own latent problems that bubbled up, or maybe it was something more. Stay alert.

Marko wasn’t paying attention to me; he was talking to Beatriz, who’d finally focused enough to ask some questions. I stood there frozen, heart pounding, wondering if I could make a break for the shuttle. Go home.

Home to what? Derry sold you out. Deluca will be waiting.

I closed my eyes, and I was surprised to hear Nadim say, very quietly, “Are you all right, Zara Cole?”

I looked at Beatriz and Marko, who stood a short distance away; neither of them acted like they’d heard a thing. It was incredible that a ship could manage the equivalent of a whisper. It was in my head, but it sounded like someone standing a respectful distance away, speaking quietly.

It was in my head. That should have felt weird, but . . . it didn’t. Sounds, after all, were just vibrations that got interpreted in the brain; he was just cutting out the step and tapping directly in. It didn’t feel strange at all.

Which was strange, in itself.

“I’m only speaking to you,” he said helpfully. “How may I help you feel more at home? The first day, I know, can be difficult.”

I turned my back on the others and walked a little distance off, so they couldn’t overhear. I lowered my voice to a whisper. “Look, I don’t know—I thought this was a good idea, but now . . .”

I felt . . . something. Not my own emotion. It was like a shadow had brushed over me, but a shadow on my soul, not on my skin. Took me a second to identify what it was, but I recognized the feeling instinctively: Nadim. And Nadim was sad. There had been some talk of possibly perceiving a ship’s emotions in training, but damned Deluca had kept me from absorbing as much as I should during my Earthside sessions.

It felt weird. And at the same time, it felt like something I’d always, unconsciously, needed—sound, where there’d only been silence. Presence, where there’d been loneliness. I didn’t know why. In the training they’d talked about it as some kind of thing to be avoided. Why would anyone avoid this? Was it dangerous?

“I would be unhappy to lose you so quickly,” he told me. “You are . . .” He hesitated, as if he didn’t quite know how to put it. “Bright.”

“Bottom of my class,” I muttered. “Sure. I’m bright.”

“That is not what I—”

Nadim’s voice got cut off midsentence as Marko turned toward me and said, “Zara? Beatriz and I were discussing meals. Nadim has more than enough food stores, so you can eat well during your Tour. They’re prepack, vacuum-seal meals, but . . .” Marko lifted his hands. “You get used to it. The WHSC tried to stock things you like.”

A shiver of amusement ran down my back. Nadim’s feeling, not mine. I was going to have to figure out how to push that away, if I wanted to keep my distance. “Hey!” I said, and turned around, not sure where to face him. “Food’s important to us. What do you eat?”

“Starlight,” he said, in that calm, warm voice. “Your sun is quite young and has a spice to it. Very strong.”

“That’s not weird at all,” I said.

“I find your ways strange sometimes too. But interesting.”