Honeysuckle Summer (The Sweet Magnolias #7)(96)

She took one more step, then another. When the mailman turned the corner, then paused to put the mail into the box, she even managed a jaunty, casual wave.

But the second he’d walked on and she’d retrieved the mail, the sense of triumph she’d experienced faded and suddenly she couldn’t breathe. She stopped where she was, her throat closing up. She regarded Dr. McDaniels with dismay, unable to squeeze out a single word.

“It’s okay,” the doctor soothed. “You’re fine. You’re in a safe place, and I’m with you. Just stand here and take a deep breath and try to relax.”

Raylene clutched at her throat. All of the old, terrifying sensations washed over her.

“Can’t breathe,” she choked out.

“Yes, you can,” Dr. McDaniels insisted. She put a comforting hand on Raylene’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “Give it a minute. In and out, just like we practiced. Not too fast, or you’ll hyperventilate.”

Closing her eyes, Raylene concentrated on taking measured breaths until they started to come naturally. In what was probably less than a minute, though it felt like much longer, she felt calmer. She was able to move forward, back to the house, back to safety.

As shaken as she’d been, she allowed herself a small moment of triumph. She’d been to the mailbox and back! It was such a short distance, but the victory seemed huge.

But even that walk, as amazing as it had been, had left her miles and miles away from the freedom of having her life back.



Sarah burst through the front door at midafternoon, scaring Raylene half to death.

“What on earth?” she murmured, when her friend embraced her and danced her around.

“Lynn called me at the station,” Sarah said gleefully. “She said she saw you at the mailbox!”

“It wasn’t worthy of an announcement on the midday news,” Raylene said, then grinned. “But it was pretty cool. I only panicked once. Then I did the breathing exercises, and it got better just the way Dr. McDaniels had said it would. I just have to consciously take control of my breathing. I can almost imagine doing it on my own.” She sighed. “But that seems like it could take forever.”

Sarah was undaunted. “This week the mailbox, next week you’ll be sitting in the studio with me at the station or having breakfast at Wharton’s or going to Sullivan’s with Carter!”

“I think you’re being overly ambitious. I still haven’t left the yard, Sarah.”

“But you will. I can feel it. You’re going to put this whole episode behind you.”

Raylene studied her exuberant expression. “I wish I shared your faith.”

“Oh, come on. Don’t be a sourpuss. This is huge. Let’s invite everyone over and celebrate.”

“You want to celebrate my walk to the mailbox? That’s pathetic.”

“No. It’s a triumph. I can hardly wait to see Carter’s face when he finds out.”

Raylene was shaking her head before the words were out of Sarah’s mouth. “No. No celebration and we’re not saying a word to Carter about this. I can’t get his hopes up.”

Sarah rolled her eyes. “I have a feeling if you didn’t want to get his hopes up, maybe you shouldn’t have slept with him.”

Raylene just stared at her. “How on earth do you know about that?”

“Thin walls and an ex-husband with a big mouth,” Sarah said with a grin. “Walter could hardly wait to tell me.”

Raylene winced. “He heard us?” She hadn’t thought the walls in the house were that thin, or that she and Carter had been that loud. It was embarrassing.

“Not really, but he said you were positively glowing at breakfast yesterday morning. He guessed the rest.”

“I’m going to kill Walter,” Raylene said grimly.

“Don’t be mad. You know how much he adores you. He only told me because he was so happy for you and knew I would be, too. You’re getting your life back, Raylene! I think it’s fantastic. So will everyone else. Please, let us celebrate this with you.”

She shook her head. “No,” she said again, “it won’t be much of a life if Paul has his way,” Raylene said realistically, ignoring all the rest. What more was there to say about her night with Carter, anyway?

“Something tells me that danger is going to pass, too,” Sarah said confidently.

Raylene chuckled at her determined optimism. “You’re very cheery today. Is something going on with you?”

“Travis and I have set our wedding date,” she admitted. “Finally. I heard from my mom today, and my dad’s gotten an okay from his doctor to make the trip.”

Raylene hugged her. “That’s wonderful!” she said with genuine enthusiasm. “I’m so glad he’s better. I know how worried you’ve been and how much you’ve wanted him to be here.”

“As important as that is, it’s just as important that you be able to walk down the aisle as my bridesmaid. And now you can! Talk about perfect timing. When I married Walter, we had such a small ceremony, and none of my friends were there. This time I’m going to be surrounded by everyone I love.”

Raylene hated to put a damper on her excitement, but she had to. “Sweetie, walking to the mailbox is a far cry from being able to walk down the aisle of a church with you, much as I would love that. You absolutely cannot count on that.”