Her One Mistake(92)
“Of course I would’ve,” Charlotte says, but Harriet hears the moment’s pause that’s just a fraction too long.
“Do you regret what you said to the police?”
Charlotte looks down at her untouched cake. “Actually I don’t,” she admits. “Because I don’t think the alternative was a better option. But there’s something else—” Her heart is beating hard. She isn’t even sure she wants to hear the answer anymore. “I know you can swim, Harriet. Alice told me when we were on the beach. She said you used to take her swimming but that it was a big secret. She actually told me so I wouldn’t worry about you in that boat.”
Harriet continues to look at Charlotte and gives a barely perceptible nod. Her hand is shaking as it grips the fork again.
“What happened to Brian?” Charlotte says as a cry erupts from above them. “Did you—did it happen on purpose?”
Harriet looks up to the ceiling but doesn’t move. The cry stops and she glances back at Charlotte, eyes wide in shock, and now Charlotte really doesn’t want to hear her answer.
The crying starts again, this time a persistent wail, and Harriet hurries out of the kitchen. Charlotte slumps back in her chair. She shouldn’t have asked.
Harriet comes back holding her baby, who is tightly swaddled against her chest, and gently peels the blanket away so Charlotte can get a better look.
Baby George has a head of dark hair and tiny features, and when he opens his brown eyes Charlotte sees the resemblance immediately. The baby is identical to Brian. She hopes she hasn’t reacted badly as she runs a hand over his soft hair, but for a moment she can’t breathe. “He’s lovely,” she says eventually, because of course he is, whether he looks like his dad or not.
Harriet presses her lips against her son’s head and continues to watch Charlotte, who in turn is wondering if Harriet can see the similarities or whether she only sees her son. She prays it’s the latter.
“The first time I felt protective over George was when I was on that boat with Brian,” Harriet says. “Before then I’d tried to ignore the fact I was pregnant. I couldn’t imagine bringing another child into our family the way it was.”
Charlotte keeps looking at George as she strokes his tiny head.
“Brian had started controlling Alice, too,” she says. “I couldn’t let him do any more damage.”
“Harriet, I shouldn’t have said anything—” Charlotte starts, but Harriet interrupts her.
“He could have killed me. He would have taken me from Alice, and once he knew he had a son—” Harriet pauses and closes her eyes as she nestles deeper against her son’s head. “Children are our priority, aren’t they?”
Charlotte shuffles nervously in her chair, looks toward the door, then back at Harriet and her precious baby.
“Tell me what you would have done, Charlotte,” Harriet murmurs.
“I really don’t know,” she says honestly. She’d never have been able to consider that she could be capable of murder, but then being a mother can make you go to extraordinary lengths.
“I know I’ve asked so much of you already and I have no right to ask any more.” Harriet shakes her head as tears escape from the corners of her eyes. “But I beg you—”
Charlotte shakes her head, her heart in her throat. “You don’t have to ask, I’m not going to say anything.”
“Thank you,” Harriet whispers. “Oh God, thank you.”
? ? ?
“MUMMY! I’M HUNGRY.” Alice runs into the room and falls against her mum dramatically, dropping a kiss on her baby brother’s head. “Can I have another piece of cake?”
“No.” Harriet smiles, rubbing her daughter’s tummy. “You’ll spoil your dinner. Will you stay?” she asks Charlotte.
“Thank you, but I need to get going.” Charlotte pushes her plate away and gets up from the table. She’s booked a hotel for the night so she doesn’t have to go straight home, but for now she needs to be on her own.
“Did you know that when you told me you and Tom were splitting up, I was envious of you?” Harriet says as she gets up too and waits for Charlotte to pick up her bag and the flowers Alice had given her. “I know it sounds mad, but it summed up everything I wanted. I was also sad because I knew Tom was a good man, but you weren’t happy and you did something about it. I craved having the ability to make a choice and live with it.
“I’ve started a gardening class,” Harriet goes on.
“Really?”
She nods. “One evening a week. I have an elderly neighbor who watches the children. You gave us this security,” she says. “And I’m sorry for the way I did it, I really am. It was wrong on so many levels, but I won’t ever stop paying for it.”
Harriet steps aside and follows Charlotte into the hallway. “I’m glad you came,” she says. “I miss you.”
Charlotte stops at the door, standing aside to let Harriet open it. “I know you’re sorry,” she says quietly. It would be so easy to tell Harriet she forgives her. Maybe one day she will, but for today she feels—well, a little bit lighter, she supposes. A little bit more like she can go home to those amazing kids she has and give them a big hug. Tell Aud she wants to dress up and go out for a few drinks, and, sod it, she’ll even call Tom and say thank you. Because even though they didn’t make a very good husband and wife, he’s been a wonderful friend to her over the last year. She is lucky, she realizes. She’s always been one of the lucky ones and she doesn’t need more than what she has.