Girls of Summer(27)

Theo brought his knees to his chest, keeping the sheet over them, and folded his arms on his knees. “You really love him, don’t you?”

Beth turned bright pink. “Sure, I love him, I mean I care for him, but he’s not…not my one true love.” She couldn’t look at Theo. “I mean, he’s so smart and he can be so funny, but he can be hard work at times, and I feel more like his, oh, psychiatric nurse than his girlfriend.” She covered her face with her hands. “That’s an awful thing to say, isn’t it?”

“So would you ever, um, date someone else?”

Beth looked at Theo. She was still bright pink. “I couldn’t, Theo, not while Atticus is so unhappy.”

For one long moment, Theo’s eyes met Beth’s, and a warmth spread through his chest, through his limbs, through his face.

They both looked away.

“I’ll call Atticus and see about tonight,” Theo promised.

“Thanks, Theo.” Beth flashed him a quick smile as she rose. As she went out his door, she turned back. “Bye.”

After he heard the front door shut, Theo rose, showered, dressed, and went into the kitchen to have breakfast.

Then he called Atticus.

“Hey, I haven’t seen you in forever. Can I pull you away from your girlfriend and hang out tonight?”

   There was a long pause. “I don’t know, Theo. I’m kind of in a bad mood.”

“Oh, and this is something new?” Theo taunted.

“Fine. Let’s meet at the Jetties.”



* * *



—

They met at the playground in the dunes. In his backpack Theo carried a six-pack of beer he’d stolen from his mother’s supply. They sat on the swings for a while, idly drinking.

“How’s Beth?” Theo asked, hoping he sounded casual.

Atticus shrugged. “Annoying.”

“What?”

“Maybe it’s not her fault. Maybe I think everyone’s annoying these days.”

“What do your parents say?”

“They want me to see a shrink.”

“That might be a good idea.” Theo gazed out at the water as he spoke, not wanting to get too intense about Atticus’s depression.

“I’ve got a better idea.”

“Oh?”

“Let’s walk.” Atticus rose and headed around the turn where the sharp dark rocks of the jetties began.

Theo ambled along beside him. The water was calm, the waves splashing quietly on the beach. Far in the distance a ferry light glowed. It was spring, but it was still cold. Both guys wore jackets.

“Here’s a good place,” Atticus said. He dropped down in the shallow sand between two dunes.

Theo sat next to him. “Want another beer?”

“Not yet. No. I want you to try this.” Atticus reached into his pocket, pulled out a plastic vial, and shook a couple of white pills into his hand.

“What is it?”

“Oxy.”

   “Oh, man.” Theo shook his head. “Don’t do that.”

“Hey, I do it almost every night, and believe me, it’s the best high I’ve ever had.”

“It’s addictive, Atticus.”

“It’s addictive, Atticus,” Atticus mocked in a whiny voice. “Look, try one. One won’t get you hooked. If you want to know what I’ve been up to, this is it.”

“Atticus, come on.”

“You come on. Don’t be a wuss.”

Reluctantly, Theo took a pill.

“Chew it up. It will get in your system faster. Doesn’t taste good, but wash it down with some beer.”

Theo obeyed. “So you’d rather be out here doing this with me than be with Beth?” he asked.

“Beth’s too conservative. She won’t try it with me. She’s become a real nag.”

“That’s a shit thing to say, Atticus,” Theo said. “What’s wrong with you? She’s a…” The rush hit him. “Wow,” he said. “I’ve got to lie down.”

Theo fell back against the sand and lay there with an odd gentle ecstasy rushing through his veins. “I really love you, man,” he said to Atticus.

“Yeah, bro. Me, too.”

Maybe an hour later, Theo woke up to find himself alone in the dune. He called for Atticus, but no answer came. He sat for a while, thinking about the experience. He’d been drunk before, and in high school his sister had brought home some pot and they’d smoked it out in the yard while their mom was at a friend’s house. Unfortunately, they both discovered pot made them anxious, a terrible gripping anxiety causing them to think they couldn’t breathe. They sat outside trying to calm each other, laughing hysterically as the marijuana faded, and Theo vowed he’d never try it again.

Well, oxy was different. He’d totally found that out, and it had been a rush, but not one he wanted to repeat. He liked being in charge of himself. He was learning to surf, and surfing was a natural high, an exhilaration and sense of triumph and a feeling of being truly plugged in to the world.

   Eventually Theo pulled himself together and went home. The next morning, Atticus phoned.

Without preamble, Atticus asked, “How did you like that?”