Gifted Connections: Book 2(48)
“You know why” I communicated with him silently.
“It is you!” he rounded on me, his eyes large. His mouth never opened. “Where have you been?!”
“I had a block on me” I gently reminded him.
I was so busy communicating with Jaxson, I hadn’t noticed that Collin was watching me. “It’s Jaxson and Noah, isn’t it? They’re your connections?” he asked quietly.
“Doesn’t Noah and Jaxson have girlfriends, though?” Rachel asked perplexed.
“I did,” Noah said quickly, running a hand through his auburn curls. “I didn’t think it was fair to have a girlfriend when I started to develop feelings for another girl. I actually broke it off with her a week or so ago.” He looked over at me. “Truth be told, I had been separating myself from her for some time now, and I haven’t been…physical with her for weeks.”
I met his eyes, mine widening. I was reminded of Ella’s premonition, and realized not all of them were true. Noah had left Stacey. Jaxson and Tamara hadn’t ganged up against me, because I never attended school with them. That only left one premonition I still wondered about…
“Then who is she connected with?” Rachel asked bluntly. “Inquiring minds want to know.”
“How can we know if he can be trusted?” Jemmy said as she pointed at Collin.
“We don’t,” Remy stated. “For all we know, he’s spilling the beans because he wants to save his own hide. He already admitted that he’s easily bought.”
Collin stood up agitated. “After seeing those kids in there, there’s no way I can ever work for him again. I never knew he would stoop so low for his cause,” he said with an impassioned plea.
“And that’s the truth,” Rachel said quietly.
My head was spinning as Will took Collin, Gavin, Jemmy, and Rachel out of the room. He had asked them to leave so they could continue to talk to Collin, to figure out where we were going from here. Decisions had to be made if we continued to trust Collin or if we just transferred him to a facility up into the mountains where we took all our ‘dangerously’ gifted individuals. Will also believed Collin had more information that could be useful to us, even if Collin didn’t think he did.
I had a feeling that Will had left us alone in here, so we could finally reconnect.
“You’re our connected,” Troy immediately stated the moment he felt it was safe to talk.
I nodded, suddenly very self-conscious in my hospital gown. I ran a nervous hand through my hair and noticed it was wilder than normal. I suspected I was also pale because I had been ill the day before, and any traces of makeup was long gone. This wasn’t how I thought I would look after we were reunited by our forced separation.
“Running up the mountain to my spot,” Remy said after several moments of tense silence.
“Memory,” I responded, knowing what he was asking.
“The carriage ride through central park,” Troy spoke.
“Memory,” I answered.
“Late night conversations, chasing away your demons.” Jaxson knitted his eyebrows.
“Memory,” I retorted.
“Singing on a stage with Ben, Rick, Taylor, and Mike.” Noah ran another hand through his hair as he leaned his head back on the wall he had been sitting up against.
I felt a smile curve my lips at the memory of singing, being in a band. I had been so uncertain whether that was a path I had wanted to take. I had thought I had been forced along for the ride. But I missed it. I knew now that I wanted to stay on the ride to the very end. “Memory,” I stated finally.
“Studying on the couch listening to my iPod, before we went into the kitchen to cook together,” Drake looked almost pained as he said it. My heart felt heavy for him. For us.
“Almost every day,” I responded.
“An audition video on the piano,” Jace finally said after a few moments of silence.
“Memory,” I nodded.
“Why was it so easy for them to separate us? Why weren’t we able to stop them, if we knew it was coming?” Jaxson stood up and started to pace.
“Not all our connections were made,” I felt tears welling in my eyes. “You guys were being patient with me, but it had been a huge adjustment for me. We all led busy lives.”
“It didn’t help that I was fighting it myself,” Noah braced his elbows on his knees as he put his face in his hands. His voice was muffled as he continued, “I never thought I was good enough for her. How can I compete with you guys? I was a child with no flaws and my own parents didn’t want me. Now I am a man with many. How was my connected supposed to want me? How can I expect someone who was supposed to finally mean something to me, want me if my own parents didn’t want me? Helping children in third-world countries was more important than being with their own child. They were so determined to leave me, they died because of it.”
My heart dropped suddenly as everything clicked into place. His inability to commit to anyone before. His constant need for attention from women to bolster his self-esteem. The reason he had kept Stacey around before, while pushing me away. His spiral out of control because of his own insecurities.
I left my chair and quickly crossed the room. I pushed his legs down onto the floor, so I could straddle his legs and pull his hands away from his face. As tears coursed down my face, I was determined that he meet my eyes. I cupped his face in my hands, seeing the hurt he was so adept at hiding. “There was never a competition with any of you. I came to you guys broken. I carried scars too deep to see. Don’t you understand? When the glass was shattered and the pieces were put back together again, no pieces were the same—but all the pieces needed to be put together again if we were to be made whole.”