Forgive Me(78)

She came out from behind her desk with her face lit up and arms open wide.

Nadine looked to her mother, but then saw the smile on Angie’s face and her fleeting moment of apprehension fell away. The two embraced, and when they finally parted, both sets of eyes had filled with tears. Carolyn’s eyes were red as well, and it was not long before all three were huddled together in a long group hug.

In closer proximity, Angie picked up a scent on Carolyn’s breath. She wondered if the mother’s eyes were red from crying or something else. Angie wasn’t so na?ve as to think that finding Nadine had fixed all the things that made her run away in the first place.

Nadine, as if reading Angie’s thoughts, took that moment to announce she had driven from Potomac to Arlington on her learner’s permit. The subtext was obvious. Mom’s too drunk to drive, but I got us here safely and I’ll get us back home, too.

And there it was again, the image of Angie’s mother, impaired, driving on a rain-soaked road, heading toward a young girl in a yellow rain slicker.

“Come, have a seat,” Angie said, pulling an extra chair over to her desk.

The three sat a moment looking at each other, unsure where or how to begin.

“You look so great,” Angie finally said. “Really, Nadine, I’m beyond happy you’re here. I can’t believe I finally get to set my eyes on you.”

Nadine made a slight laugh and returned a half smile. This couldn’t be an easy meeting for her. Angie was a reminder of all she had endured.

From her purse, Nadine removed a gift-wrapped box and set it on the desk in front of Angie. “I brought this for you.” Her soft voice sounded different without a coating of fear. The timbre was sweet to the ears, rich with innocence.

It masked horrific memories Angie wouldn’t dare ask about. Details of Nadine’s ordeal inside Markovich’s operation were for Nadine and her therapists to sort through.

Angie smiled warmly and picked up the small package that fit into the palm of her hand. She unwrapped the shiny blue paper gently, careful not to make any tears, then lifted the lid on a cardboard box. Inside she found a second box made of wood. This box had a wind up handle. It was much smaller than her mother’s jewelry box up in the attic, the one with a hidden compartment. Right away, Angie recognized it as something from Nadine’s bedroom.

She opened the top, knowing the mechanics for a music box would be found inside, and wound the handle. The notes of “Canon in D Major” chimed out. It was a tune as recognizable as “The Blue Danube.”

“It’s beautiful,” Angie said.

“It’s from my bedroom, I didn’t buy it,” Nadine said, sounding a bit embarrassed.

“Oh, sweetheart. If it’s important to you, please I wouldn’t want to take it.”

“I wouldn’t have been able to give it you if you didn’t find me,” Nadine said. “I wanted you to have something from me, something personal, not just something I bought.”

Angie stood and encouraged Nadine to do the same. She embraced the girl once more.

“You’re going to come through this just fine,” Angie whispered in Nadine’s ear. “You’re so strong and I’m so proud of you.” Angie gave Nadine a gentle kiss on the cheek and retook her seat.

Carolyn said, “Her father sends his thanks. Well, he sent you a bonus. That’s his way.”

Nadine shot her mother an aggrieved look. “Mom, please.”

“Please nothing,” Carolyn said with a wave. “How many times has he seen you since you’ve been home?”

Nadine folded her arms and looked to the ceiling. “Whatever.”

“How are you doing?” Angie asked, directing her question to Carolyn.

“I’m fine,” Carolyn said.

“Good,” Angie said.

Reentry was a tricky process even without such massive obstacles to overcome. In most cases it was the child who had disobeyed parental rules, who had pushed boundaries and limits, who’d dealt with addiction issues. Here the roles were somewhat reversed. Nadine needed her mother sober and her father present. Those should have been the ground rules for reentry, but it wasn’t Angie’s place to make such demands.

“How about you, Nadine? How are you holding up?”

Nadine looked to the floor. “Yeah, it’s not easy, you know. Like my friends are cool, well, some of them, but I dunno. I’m all right, I guess.” She blinked rapidly and her breathing turned shallow. Sharing even a little bit of her experience was difficult.

Angie wrote something on the back of her business card and handed the card to Nadine. “I’m not sure if you still have my cell phone number, but here it is again. Call anytime. I mean it. Anytime, day or night, for any reason. Just to say hello, or talk, or vent, whatever. I’m here for you.”

Nadine took the card and returned an appreciative nod. Her gaze went to Angie’s walls of photographs. “What’s with all the pictures?” She pointed behind Angie.

Angie turned to look at the many smiling faces framed nicely beneath glass. “Those are the runaways I’ve helped to find and their parents and loved ones. I’m glad you asked, because I was hoping to get a picture of you and your mom for the wall.”

Angie got out her phone that had become a replacement for her camera. Carolyn and Nadine draped their arms around each other. They didn’t have to put the defroster on high to get close. Angie took the picture and showed them the results.