Forever, Interrupted(16)

“Awesome! Two only children! I knew I liked you.” He high-fived me sloppily as he kept one hand on the wheel.

“Do I get any hints about where we are going yet?” I asked, as he merged from one freeway onto the next.

“It’s Mexican” was all I could get out of him.

After two games of Twenty Questions and one game of I Spy, we finally made it to our destination. It was a shack. Quite literally. It was a shack in the middle of the road called Cactus Tacos. I was underwhelmed, but Ben’s face lit up.

“We’re here!” he said as he flicked off his seat belt and opened his car door. I gathered my things, and he came around to my side. He opened the door for me before I could open it for myself.

“Why, thank you!” I said over the dinging of his car, reminding us that the door needed to be closed.

“Certainly.”

I crawled out and stood next to him.

“So this is the place, huh?” I said. He shut the door behind me and the dinging relented.

“I know it doesn’t look like much. But you said you were up for an adventure and these are honestly the best tacos I’ve ever had in my life. Do you like horchata?”

“What is horchata?”

“It’s rice milk with cinnamon. Just—trust me. You gotta try one.” As we walked toward the taco stand, he put his hand on the small of my back, guiding me ever so gently. It felt so comforting and so natural that it made me want to turn around into his arms. It made me want to touch more of him with more of me. Instead, I stood and stared at the menu.

“If it’s okay,” Ben said, moving his hand up my back and now onto my shoulder, “I’ll order for you. I fully respect your right to order for yourself. It’s just that I’ve been here many, many times and I know everything on this menu.”

“Be my guest,” I said.

“Do you like chicken, steak, pork?”

“No pork,” I said.

“No pork?” Ben said, incredulous. “I’m kidding. I don’t like pork either. All right!” He rubbed his hands together eagerly.

“Perdón?” he said through the window to the man behind the counter. “Queria cuatro tacos tinga de pollo y cuatro tacos carne asada, por favor? Queso extra en todos. Ah, y dos horchatas, por favor.”

The man showed him the size of the horchatas with a look that said, “Are you sure you want two of these?” and Ben nodded. “Sí, sí, lo sé. Dos. Por favor.”

I don’t know what it was exactly that made Ben seem so irresistible at that moment. I don’t know if it was because he seemed so knowledgeable about something I knew nothing about (Spanish), or whether it was because any time a man spoke another language it was inherently sexy to me (because that was also true). I don’t know. I just know that as I stood there, unable to understand what was being communicated around me, I thought Ben Ross was the sexiest man I’d ever seen. He was so secure in himself, so sure that this would all turn out okay. That’s what it was. It was the confidence. He spoke Spanish to the man at the taco stand like it never occurred to him he might sound like a complete idiot. And that was exactly why he did not sound like a complete idiot.

“Wow,” I said, as he handed me my horchata. “That’s impressive.”

“I swear that’s about the extent of my knowledge,” he said as he unwrapped a straw and put it in my drink. “But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t hoping to impress you.”

“Well, so far, so good.” I took a sip of the drink. It was sweet and cold, creamy and yet easy to drink in big gulps. “Wow, this is great too.”

Ben smiled as he took a sip of his own. “I’m doing okay?” he asked.

“You’re doing great,” I told him. I was overwhelmed, to be honest. It had been so long since I’d had a crush on someone I’d forgotten how exciting it makes everything you do.

When our tacos were ready, Ben grabbed them from the window. They came stuffed in red and white checkered cartons. He grabbed all of them and balanced them over his forearms and in his hands.

There were no places to sit at Cactus Tacos, and so Ben suggested we sit on the hood of his car.

“These tacos look messy. I’ll spill pico de gallo all over your car.”

“It’s a ten-year-old Honda. I’m not exactly precious about it.”

“Fine. But I feel like you should know that I’m very clumsy and messy.”

“And you forget your keys a lot.”

“Well, I forget everything a lot.”

“So far, it’s all good by me.”

We sat on his hood and we talked about our jobs and if we liked living in Los Angeles, and sure enough, I dripped taco grease onto his bumper. Ben just smiled at me. Ana called me as I was feebly attempting to clean it up and I put her through to voice mail. Ben and I talked long after the tacos were gone.

Eventually, Ben asked me if I wanted dessert.

“You have somewhere else in mind?” I asked.

“No,” he said. “I thought it would be lady’s choice.”

“Oh,” I said. I was somewhat at a loss as to what to suggest. I had no idea where we were, no idea what was around us. “Actually,” I said. “Are you up for another adventure?”