Force of Nature (Aaron Falk #2)(54)

‘Let’s find the road.’ She handed the map to Alice, hesitated, and passed the compass to Lauren. ‘I know you don’t agree, but we’re all stuck in this together.’

They’d shared the mouthful of rainwater collected in the bottle, Bree’s allocated sip only making her thirst worse. Then they had started to walk, ignoring their twisting stomachs and sore limbs.

Bree kept her eyes on the ground, putting one foot after the other. They had been going for nearly three hours when she felt something land with a gentle thump near her boot. She stopped. A tiny egg lay shattered on the ground, its core leaking out, clear and gelatinous. Bree looked up. High above, the branches were rocking in the wind and among them, a small brown bird peered down. It twitched its head. Bree couldn’t tell if it understood what had happened. Would the bird miss its little lost egg, or had it forgotten it already?

Bree could hear her sister approaching from behind, her smoker’s lungs giving her away.

Get some perspective. It’s just a bloody job.

It wasn’t, though. Bree had been twenty-one and four days away from graduating with honours when she’d realised she was pregnant. Her boyfriend of eighteen months, who she’d known had been secretly browsing rings on the Tiffany website, had said nothing for ten minutes while he paced around the kitchen of their student flat. That was one of the things she remembered most clearly. Wishing he’d sit down. Finally, he had and had placed his hand over hers.

‘You’ve worked so hard,’ he said. ‘What about your internship?’ His own internship in New York was due to start four weeks later, followed by a place on a post-graduate law degree course. ‘How many graduates a year does BaileyTennants take again?’

One. BaileyTennants took one graduate a year for its development program. He knew this. That year it would be Bree McKenzie.

‘You’re so excited.’ That was true. She had been thrilled at the prospect. She still was, surely. He had added his other hand at this point, cupping her palm in both of his.

‘It’s mind-blowing. It is. And I love you so much. It’s just –’ His eyes showed true terror. ‘Bad timing.’

At last, she had nodded, and by the next morning, he had helped her schedule the necessary appointment.

‘Our kids will be proud, one day,’ he’d said. He had definitely said ‘our’. She remembered that distinctly. ‘It makes so much sense to get your career under your belt first. You deserve to make the most of your opportunities.’

Yes, she had told herself later, many times. She’d done it for her career and for all those great opportunities lying in store. She had definitely not done it for him. Which was lucky, because he had never once called her again after he left for New York.

Bree looked down now at the smashed egg. Above, the mother bird had disappeared. With her boot, Bree swept some dried leaves over the broken shell. She couldn’t think what else to do.

‘Stop here.’ Jill’s voice floated forward. She was trailing the pack. ‘Let’s rest for a minute.’

‘Here?’ Alice turned and looked back. The trees were still tight, but the path had grown a little wider and no longer disappeared underfoot.

Jill dropped her pack without answering. She was red-faced, her hair sticking out in tufts. She was reaching for something in her jacket pockets when she stopped, her gaze snagging on a broken tree stump at the side of the path.

Without a word, she moved towards it. A pool of rainwater had collected in the bowl of the stump. Jill, who Bree had once seen refuse a herbal tea because the leaves had infused too long, suddenly dipped her cupped hands into the stump, lifted them to her lips and swallowed deeply. She paused to pick something black from her mouth, flicking it off her finger before dipping her hands in again.

Bree swallowed, her own tongue immediately swollen and dry, and stepped up to the stump. She plunged her hands in, the first scoop sloshing over her knuckles as her arm collided with Jill’s. She went in again, lifting her palms to her lips more hastily this time. The water tasted dank and coarse, but she didn’t stop, dipping in again, now jostling for space with four other pairs of hands. Someone pushed her hands out of the way, and Bree shoved back, ignoring the pain as her fingers bent backwards. She plunged in again, fighting for her share, the sound of grunts and swallows loud in her ears. She kept her head down, determined to cram as much into her mouth as possible. Before she realised it, the water was gone, and her fingernails were scraping the mossy bottom.

She stepped back quickly. Her mouth was gritty and she felt unbalanced, like she’d crossed a line she hadn’t known existed. She thought she wasn’t the only one; she could see her surprise and shame echoed on the faces around her. The water churned in her empty stomach and she had to bite her lip to stop herself vomiting.

One by one, they edged further away from the stump, avoiding eye contact. Bree sat down on her pack and watched as Jill pulled one boot off and peeled back her sock. Her heel looked bloodied and raw. Nearby, Lauren was checking the compass for the thousandth time. Bree hoped it was telling her something.

There was the flick of a lighter and the faint hint of cigarette smoke.

‘Seriously, do you really have to do that now?’ Alice said.

‘Yes. That’s why it’s called an addiction.’ Beth didn’t look up, but Bree felt an uneasy ripple run through the group.