Fallen Woman(37)

The knock on the front door alerted me to the arrival of my date. I slid on my four-inch heels and sauntered to the door. The dress he’d chosen was very sexy and very revealing, but I felt powerful in it. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had this much confidence. I hoped he had picked appropriately for the occasion. Otherwise, I’d be receiving attention I wasn’t interested in getting.

When I opened the front door, I could tell by the expression on his face that he, too, thought I looked amazing, and his eyes hinted at more. “You—you’re stunning, Gianna. Absolutely breathtaking.” He motioned for me to twirl, which I obliged, before he smacked me playfully on the rear end. I couldn’t help but grin—the attention felt good, it was just the wrong man.

Dinner had been fantastic and the conversation easy. He knew my circumstances, and when we were alone at the table, he’d asked about the mugging and Miss Pearl. I told him about Jase being adamant he didn’t want me taking public transportation, but I refused to let him buy me a car. He laughed at how protective Jase was of me and joked that if people heard him talk, they’d think we were together. I played it off as though that would be preposterous, but I hung onto every word he said, hoping to get a clue of whether or not Jase felt more than friendship. When Holland never broached the subject again, I didn’t think I could ask without raising questions. I’d probably told him too much about my financial issues and my desire to help Pearl, but heck, he picked me up in the projects, so he couldn’t be totally clueless. I’d kept Emmy’s secret, though not by much.

I played my role dutifully, but the more wine Holland had to drink, the more handsy he became. I knew he was flirting and I should have stopped it when it started, but it played into the tone of the evening. It boosted my confidence and lifted my morale. While dancing with him, his hand would inch down my waist until he had cupped my butt; he’d pull me into him and tuck his head into my neck. The warmth of his breath sent heat to my lady bits—alcohol induced desire. It had been so long since a man had touched me with any intention. Fermented grapes clouded my judgment, and I allowed his hands to wander. As they came up my sides, he settled one on my hip while the other continued to travel up, past my rib cage. His thumb grazed the bit of my breast exposed by the side of the dress, and I pictured them being Jase’s hands on my body, pleading in my mind for him to touch more of me. With every song the band played, Holland got more familiar, and my mind convinced me he was safe. We were friends enjoying the feel of each other’s skin on a dance floor.

By the time we left, I was notably more intoxicated than Holland, although he was tipsy enough he’d called his driver to come pick us up instead of driving home. When his car arrived, the chauffeur stepped around the car to open the door for us. I climbed in first, and Holland briefly closed the door behind me before reopening it and joining me in the back.

“Everything okay?” I asked half lit.

He tucked a piece of hair behind my ear. “Yeah, just thought it would be nice to go for a ride before taking you home.” His eyes raked my body as he spoke.

I didn’t object. The kids were with Miss Pearl and wouldn’t be home until morning. Going home alone with a buzz wasn’t my idea of a great way to end the evening. He opened the sunroof and allowed the breeze to flow into the seat and provide a view of the brilliant night sky. I closed my eyes and permitted the cool air to wash over me, which somehow heightened my buzz. When his hand landed on my thigh, the warmth was so inviting I didn’t think to fight it off. I felt him shift in the seat next to me but didn’t turn to see what he was doing. The caress of his soft fingers on my thigh sent a shiver up my spine.

As he snuck closer to the end of the rainbow, I didn’t make a move to halt his progression. I knew I should have, but I wanted the moment of pleasure—the feel of intimate contact. His nose traced the outline of my ear, and his breath teased my neck. The moment his finger traced the fabric of my panties over my sex, I nearly lost my composure. His teeth nipped at my ear as he stroked, ever so faintly, the outline of my slit covered in satin. I turned my face toward his, burying him in my neck, silently encouraging his progression. But in my imagination, it was Jase’s tongue licking my skin and Jase’s hand tempting me. Except, when I opened my eyes, Holland’s face was before me.

The sound of his zipper brought me back to reality, even if it was still hazy. In the blink of an eye, he’d taken my hand in his while releasing his beast from captivity. I gawked at his nakedness as he wrapped my fingers around his penis and stroked his hand over my own. The skin was soft and smooth, but it was all wrong.

“Holland…” His name came out like a breathless moan of desire, not a command to stop. I watched him close his eyelids; his head fell back, and the pressure in his grasp increased along with the speed in which we both stroked his shaft. When I finally had the wherewithal to pull my hand from his grasp, he looked at me with confused eyes.

“What’s wrong, Gianna?”

“I can’t do this.” My words were merely a whisper. I knew I’d led him on and didn’t want to be considered a tease, but I couldn’t ruin the possibility of a lifetime with Jase for a moment of pleasure with Holland.

He regarded me with hooded eyes. “You’re attracted to me, so what’s holding you back?”

I was having a hard time formulating rational thoughts, much less those that wouldn’t give me away. “I just can’t.”